Malfunction, hopefully
I believe this isn't meant to happen.30 total reviews
Comment from harmony13
The first 2 lines of this poem flow and connect well. The last is is
eccentric! I tried to picture the walls stretching and am still pondering on
these words! The poem flows and connects well. The artwork is awesome
and compliments the words in this poem!
  |
The first 2 lines of this poem flow and connect well. The last is is
eccentric! I tried to picture the walls stretching and am still pondering on
these words! The poem flows and connects well. The artwork is awesome
and compliments the words in this poem!
Comment Written 26-Aug-2022
Comment from jake cosmos aller
love this poem that sounds like a bad ACID Trip as you go down the proverbial rabbit hole of reality as the drug scrambles reality all around you taking you to dark corners.
|
love this poem that sounds like a bad ACID Trip as you go down the proverbial rabbit hole of reality as the drug scrambles reality all around you taking you to dark corners.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2022
Comment from Eternal Muse
An amusing poem with a very find presentation and picture. I must admit, I had trouble with the last word of the second line (lol).
Good imagery, visuals and superb presentation. Best of luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2022
|
An amusing poem with a very find presentation and picture. I must admit, I had trouble with the last word of the second line (lol).
Good imagery, visuals and superb presentation. Best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2022
-
Thanks so much for the review! Don't worry, you weren't the first person who has had trouble. I clarified in the author's notes to make it less confusing. Thanks again!
-
Oh, thank you for clarifying, I see now!
Comment from Wendy G
Interesting, thought-provoking - and very different,and the image pairs well with your imaginative 5-7-5. Best wishes for your entry in the contest.
Wendy
|
Interesting, thought-provoking - and very different,and the image pairs well with your imaginative 5-7-5. Best wishes for your entry in the contest.
Wendy
Comment Written 26-Aug-2022
Comment from Gloria ....
This is most menacing as the place seems to be in another dimension, and possibly alive too. Clever use of sdrawkcab, and then followed by the stretching.
Well done with a most unique entry. Best of luck with the voters.
Gloria
|
This is most menacing as the place seems to be in another dimension, and possibly alive too. Clever use of sdrawkcab, and then followed by the stretching.
Well done with a most unique entry. Best of luck with the voters.
Gloria
Comment Written 26-Aug-2022
Comment from Bill Schott
This 5-7-5, Malfunction Hopefully, has the right set up and creates an odd scene where one would hope they are in a dreamscape that will disappear when waking. Whew!
|
This 5-7-5, Malfunction Hopefully, has the right set up and creates an odd scene where one would hope they are in a dreamscape that will disappear when waking. Whew!
Comment Written 26-Aug-2022
Comment from ImaginosBuzzardoDesdinova
Very interesting writing. Makes me think of a preoperative countdown. I like the use of the reversed backwards. Very effective. Nicely written poem. Looking forward to more.
|
Very interesting writing. Makes me think of a preoperative countdown. I like the use of the reversed backwards. Very effective. Nicely written poem. Looking forward to more.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2022
Comment from Fleedleflump
This is like a horror senryu, which is certainly something different. Combined with the image, you had me visualising all sorts of chilling movie scenes. Awesome stuff :-)
Mike
|
This is like a horror senryu, which is certainly something different. Combined with the image, you had me visualising all sorts of chilling movie scenes. Awesome stuff :-)
Mike
Comment Written 26-Aug-2022
Comment from royowen
You've certainly got the right amount of syllables, but I'm bamboozled as to what word we have here, my spellchecker doesn't like it, nor my interpretive text, but well done, good luck, blessings Roy
Query: Sdrawkcab?
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2022
|
You've certainly got the right amount of syllables, but I'm bamboozled as to what word we have here, my spellchecker doesn't like it, nor my interpretive text, but well done, good luck, blessings Roy
Query: Sdrawkcab?
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2022
reply by the author on 26-Aug-2022
-
Thanks for the review, Roy. the word is "backwards" spelt backwards!
-
Of course it is, perhaps explain that in your notes for dummies like me.
Comment from rspoet
This is an excellent 5-7-5 poem for the contest
with very good use of visuals like "backwards" and "glows"
appearing that way as well as "stretching."
Malfunction or just a test, either way an excellent entry.
Good luck in the voting.
Robert
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
|
This is an excellent 5-7-5 poem for the contest
with very good use of visuals like "backwards" and "glows"
appearing that way as well as "stretching."
Malfunction or just a test, either way an excellent entry.
Good luck in the voting.
Robert
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 26-Aug-2022