Genius in Love
Viewing comments for Chapter 4 "Genius in Love (Scene 4)"In Search of a Soul
29 total reviews
Comment from Ric Myworld
Like Cornelius, many of us, as children, and even adults makeup the story as we go along, and luckily we can often times block out the bad and enhance the good. Thanks for sharing another fine scene.
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Like Cornelius, many of us, as children, and even adults makeup the story as we go along, and luckily we can often times block out the bad and enhance the good. Thanks for sharing another fine scene.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Thank you, Ric, for brightening up my day! Sixes and kindness does that. Yes it does.
Comment from BethShelby
You are doing a great job of creating this autistic boy genius. I think what is going on in his head may be the kind of things that cause autistic children to act as they do. The anxiety and the rocking back and forth and the confusion with the world of normal people seems real. I'm enjoying this. Maybe you understand autism better than most.
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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You are doing a great job of creating this autistic boy genius. I think what is going on in his head may be the kind of things that cause autistic children to act as they do. The anxiety and the rocking back and forth and the confusion with the world of normal people seems real. I'm enjoying this. Maybe you understand autism better than most.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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I've been told I may have stumbled onto a grasp of autistic children. I hope it's enough not to offend anyone who is grappling with this problem with their children. Thanks so much for the six and your continued kindness, Beth.
Comment from Ulla
Hi Jay, I'm completely taken with this screen play and the story within. How well you are writing this and showing us who Cornelius really is and what his thoughts are. Bless him. How difficult it must be to suffer just because you're perceived to be different. A very interesting story and subject. All best, Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Hi Jay, I'm completely taken with this screen play and the story within. How well you are writing this and showing us who Cornelius really is and what his thoughts are. Bless him. How difficult it must be to suffer just because you're perceived to be different. A very interesting story and subject. All best, Ulla:)))
Comment Written 25-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Oh ... to have you aboard. You don't know how important that is to me. Thanks for your continued support and of course for the six stars.
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I'm glad. What a sweet thing to say.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Bless his heart. The verbal abuse these children and grown-ups have to put up with just because they are 'different' is awful. Having an autistic grandson makes me appreciate even more the problems of your lovely character Cornelius. I loved how something took him over and he was able to continue his story that his mother was reading aloud and without the normal clipped style of his speech. This story is progressing beautifully, Jay. Well done! I look forward to the next part. Have a lovely week. :)) Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Bless his heart. The verbal abuse these children and grown-ups have to put up with just because they are 'different' is awful. Having an autistic grandson makes me appreciate even more the problems of your lovely character Cornelius. I loved how something took him over and he was able to continue his story that his mother was reading aloud and without the normal clipped style of his speech. This story is progressing beautifully, Jay. Well done! I look forward to the next part. Have a lovely week. :)) Sandra xxx
Comment Written 25-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Bless you, Sandra. Bless you and your kindness and for using one of your (hard to hold onto) six stars. Thank you so much.
Comment from Leann DS
I really enjoyed reading this. The dialogue is great and there are lots of stage directions that help me visualize the scene.
If I may, I think there is a typo in the following paragraph:
"Cornelius. That's me. Pidely-Poo found me in Mrs. Gracely's classroom in Kindergarten. And Pidely-Poo stayed with me. He taught me the secret way to return to the Island of Ahhhhhhhhhmmmm--like that. And I did. And I went there with Pidely-Poo. And it was so beautiful and music was everywhere, in the trees, in the waterfalls, in the waves crashing all around the island. So beautiful, the music. And then, one day he was gone. He left me back here. I want Pidely-Poo to come back. I looked for him everywhere on the Island of Ahhhhhhhhhmmmm, but he is gone. What I daydream about most is Pidely-Poo coming back to me. I need Pidely-Poo to help me bring our mother back to the Island of Ahm because I can't do it myself. But Pidely-Poo doesn't come back to me. Anyway, that is my daydream. And it is true. Cornelius B. Plumb."
AHM should be AWM?
Well done, and I hope this was helpful. Hugs and blessings to you!
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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I really enjoyed reading this. The dialogue is great and there are lots of stage directions that help me visualize the scene.
If I may, I think there is a typo in the following paragraph:
"Cornelius. That's me. Pidely-Poo found me in Mrs. Gracely's classroom in Kindergarten. And Pidely-Poo stayed with me. He taught me the secret way to return to the Island of Ahhhhhhhhhmmmm--like that. And I did. And I went there with Pidely-Poo. And it was so beautiful and music was everywhere, in the trees, in the waterfalls, in the waves crashing all around the island. So beautiful, the music. And then, one day he was gone. He left me back here. I want Pidely-Poo to come back. I looked for him everywhere on the Island of Ahhhhhhhhhmmmm, but he is gone. What I daydream about most is Pidely-Poo coming back to me. I need Pidely-Poo to help me bring our mother back to the Island of Ahm because I can't do it myself. But Pidely-Poo doesn't come back to me. Anyway, that is my daydream. And it is true. Cornelius B. Plumb."
AHM should be AWM?
Well done, and I hope this was helpful. Hugs and blessings to you!
Comment Written 25-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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No, Leann, I intended Ahhhhhhhhmmmmm. Though oddly enough, I had tinkered with the idea of AWM, which was more inkeeping with the Buddhist mantra, AUM. What I was trying to do was duplicate verbally the sound of a long uninterrupted exhale, and ahhhhhhhhhmmmmm did that for me. I thought you might have caught an instance where I mistakenly used awwwwwwmmmm, so I looked back, but as far as I can see I was consistent. If you had something else in mind, please do let me know. Thank you in the meantime for your kind words about the rest of the play and for the lovely sparker.
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Oh, that is what you were trying to say! :-) I get it now. I thought I saw it spelled "OHM" somewhere before I went blind, but I looked it up and I found this:
https://www.yogapedia.com/2/8623/meditation/mantra/the-meaning-of-om-mani-padme-hum
So maybe it is spelled "om"?
Comment from Melodie Michelle
This is my first time reviewing a script! I think it's an excellent work that is quite well written and intriguing as the story unfolds;-)
The characters interact perfectly together and the storyline is awesome!
Thanxxx for sharing;-)
May God bless you and your family;-)
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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This is my first time reviewing a script! I think it's an excellent work that is quite well written and intriguing as the story unfolds;-)
The characters interact perfectly together and the storyline is awesome!
Thanxxx for sharing;-)
May God bless you and your family;-)
Comment Written 25-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Thank you so much, Melodie Michelle! (Is that your true name? I love it!) I hope I have you on board for the rest of Cornelius's journey.
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
This is an excellent continuation to the last scene, and the two as a whole are outstanding. I particularly liked the fact that Cornelius's voice pattern changed so dramatically when he recited his daydream from memory. I have seen the same thing happen with dementia patients. Habitually extremely slow to react, when it comes to speaking about a meal they have just enjoyed, or a game, they communicate like normal once more.
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reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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This is an excellent continuation to the last scene, and the two as a whole are outstanding. I particularly liked the fact that Cornelius's voice pattern changed so dramatically when he recited his daydream from memory. I have seen the same thing happen with dementia patients. Habitually extremely slow to react, when it comes to speaking about a meal they have just enjoyed, or a game, they communicate like normal once more.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Thank you, Katherine, for your kind words and your authentication of speech patterns of dementia patients. There is so much to learn about the human brain.
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meant to say, but forgot, that introducing this change in Cornelius brought strong realism to your scene.
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Yes... thank you for noticing that. I'd hoped it would.
Comment from Jasmine Girl
I love this screen play, the alternative reality and the real situation at school intertwined with each other. I can see the island of Ahm start popping up and taking over the screen. It seems to be his music muse, too. This is a wild screen play and can't wait to read more.
Exceptionally imaginative.
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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I love this screen play, the alternative reality and the real situation at school intertwined with each other. I can see the island of Ahm start popping up and taking over the screen. It seems to be his music muse, too. This is a wild screen play and can't wait to read more.
Exceptionally imaginative.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Thanks so much, Lisa. I don't want to let the fantasy element take over everything, though. I need to have it bedded in reality. Oh, your review and the lovely 6 stars make me smile!
Comment from Elizabeth Emerald
Compelling--good work conveying his concrete thinking re crying=sad and internalizing/extrapolating his father's belittling remarks. Sugg: in note make reference to "Howlward" for those not familiar with backstory.
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reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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Compelling--good work conveying his concrete thinking re crying=sad and internalizing/extrapolating his father's belittling remarks. Sugg: in note make reference to "Howlward" for those not familiar with backstory.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2021
reply by the author on 25-Apr-2021
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I was wondering about that. Or, perhaps have Toloache use Howard's name in her tirade against his saying that Cornelius didn't have an ounce of Pride. Just something to connect Howard with Howlword. Thanks, Liz! Your reviews are always appreciated.