Constantine in Hell
Everything has a price19 total reviews
Comment from Ben B.
I love Constantine and the CW show. I must however advise you find another name other than Sarah; for a moment I thought you meant Sarah Lance who died and got resurrected on the Arrow show.
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2020
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I love Constantine and the CW show. I must however advise you find another name other than Sarah; for a moment I thought you meant Sarah Lance who died and got resurrected on the Arrow show.
Comment Written 11-Oct-2020
reply by the author on 11-Oct-2020
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Oh Man, You're right. I forgot about her. I will change the name.
Thank you, Ben.
Comment from teols2016
Nice, but a bit quickl. That's the nature of Flash Fiction. You told a great story , leaving me wanting more. Well done and best of luck in the contest.
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Nice, but a bit quickl. That's the nature of Flash Fiction. You told a great story , leaving me wanting more. Well done and best of luck in the contest.
Comment Written 11-Oct-2020
Comment from LJbutterfly
It sounds as though stories of John Constantine is a series. If so, this was my first intriguing episode. You selected the perfect picture which helped my imagination. Your tight writing style provides a lot of action and description of the scene and characters in just a few words. John's chant was especially creative. Flash fiction is not the easiest form of story-telling. The explanation at the end was also very helpful.
Lorraine
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It sounds as though stories of John Constantine is a series. If so, this was my first intriguing episode. You selected the perfect picture which helped my imagination. Your tight writing style provides a lot of action and description of the scene and characters in just a few words. John's chant was especially creative. Flash fiction is not the easiest form of story-telling. The explanation at the end was also very helpful.
Lorraine
Comment Written 11-Oct-2020
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
That was an excellent flash fiction, one that could be brought back as a novel. Did he deflower her? Is she pregnant with a demon child? You really should cultivate this flash fiction after you've won. Yes, it's a winner in my mind. Well done and good luck! :) Sandra xx
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That was an excellent flash fiction, one that could be brought back as a novel. Did he deflower her? Is she pregnant with a demon child? You really should cultivate this flash fiction after you've won. Yes, it's a winner in my mind. Well done and good luck! :) Sandra xx
Comment Written 11-Oct-2020
Comment from thaities, Rebecca V.
This is indeed a horror filled entry for the Supernatural Flash Fiction writing prompt. It sent shivers up my spine just reading it. Good luck in the contest.
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This is indeed a horror filled entry for the Supernatural Flash Fiction writing prompt. It sent shivers up my spine just reading it. Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 11-Oct-2020
Comment from Sanku
It was an interesting story .Te fear element was sustained through out and at the same time we could laugh in relief at the end. But Sarah losing her mind is a sad thing.all the best for the contest.
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It was an interesting story .Te fear element was sustained through out and at the same time we could laugh in relief at the end. But Sarah losing her mind is a sad thing.all the best for the contest.
Comment Written 11-Oct-2020
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written supernatural flash fiction. The hero of the story Constantine saves the girl from the monstrous demon but no one can tell that she is really saved before nine months passed.
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A very well-written supernatural flash fiction. The hero of the story Constantine saves the girl from the monstrous demon but no one can tell that she is really saved before nine months passed.
Comment Written 11-Oct-2020
Comment from royowen
Poor Sarah, will she ever recover, and he's a sorcerer, and overcame the demon, very skilfully and very cleverly, fancy thinking getting the bullets blessed by the Archbishop, to really fool the demon. But then beating the demon at his own game is a feather in his cap, still apprehensive about demon spawns, well done blessings Roy
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Poor Sarah, will she ever recover, and he's a sorcerer, and overcame the demon, very skilfully and very cleverly, fancy thinking getting the bullets blessed by the Archbishop, to really fool the demon. But then beating the demon at his own game is a feather in his cap, still apprehensive about demon spawns, well done blessings Roy
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 11-Oct-2020
Comment from phill doran
Hello Anon
Very good. Lots of story and an interesting character - in a very small working area. This was interesting and highly amusing.
In passing, some of your punctuation needs to be addressed;
"...student John, was hired to find knelt nude..." I think the comma should be after "find" (and perhaps 'nude' should be 'naked' as you used 'nude' in your opening?)
"...his knees with a smoking black hole in its..." I am not too sure you can go from 'his' to 'its' - it should be one or the other.
"...Arch Bishop..." one word 'archbishop'
"...Damn, right..." no comma required.
"...understand, though ignorant..." a full stop after 'understand'
"...spawns..." I think should be spawn - spawns is the less common plural.
"...gorilla-sized Choas demon..." should be Chaos
As I say, I found this amusing - just tidy it up and you have a good entry I think.
Cheers
phill
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
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Hello Anon
Very good. Lots of story and an interesting character - in a very small working area. This was interesting and highly amusing.
In passing, some of your punctuation needs to be addressed;
"...student John, was hired to find knelt nude..." I think the comma should be after "find" (and perhaps 'nude' should be 'naked' as you used 'nude' in your opening?)
"...his knees with a smoking black hole in its..." I am not too sure you can go from 'his' to 'its' - it should be one or the other.
"...Arch Bishop..." one word 'archbishop'
"...Damn, right..." no comma required.
"...understand, though ignorant..." a full stop after 'understand'
"...spawns..." I think should be spawn - spawns is the less common plural.
"...gorilla-sized Choas demon..." should be Chaos
As I say, I found this amusing - just tidy it up and you have a good entry I think.
Cheers
phill
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 11-Oct-2020