Comment from Mark D. R.

Excellent

Hi Diana!

A smashing set of words and visuals for this contest posting.

Sprinkled throughout are all those sensational s-sound alliterations.

My favorite words are: sea-kissed, swash, briny depths, and ebbing.

Best of luck in the contest voting.

Mark

 Comment Written 22-Aug-2019

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reply by the author on 22-Aug-2019

Thank you so much, Mark! this is my first attempt at this style and was a little challenging, I must say! I appreciate your positive and encouraging review very much! I wish they would give us more reviewer nominations as you have been very supportive of all my work, but I won't have any more until the end of the month :( xoxo

reply by Mark D. R. on 22-Aug-2019

Diana,

Thank you! Your reply is my reward enough.

Mark

reply by the author on 22-Aug-2019

xoxoxo!! :)

Comment from Patty Palmer

Excellent

Your poem is relaxing to read! The picture is also beautiful and soothing. The music was an added treat putting me in the Hawii mindset. good work! Granddaughter so sweet!

 Comment Written 22-Aug-2019

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reply by the author on 22-Aug-2019

Thank you! First time trying this style! Appreciate your encouraging review :) xoxo

reply by Patty Palmer on 22-Aug-2019

You're welcome!
Patty

Comment from Debbie Pope

Excellent

I like this, Diana. Thank you for defining the word 'swash'. It is essential to the understanding of the poem, and I had no idea. I particularly like the last two lines. If it was me, I would change "caressing" to "caresses" to match the "recoils" verb. I would also put "swash caresses" as the second line because that is what is flowing. Then the sand line with two added syllables for your third line. For instance
flowing,
swash caresses
sea-kissed sand, then curtly
recoils seeking the briny depths,
ebbing

Good luck in the contest. Your images are lovely.

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 Comment Written 21-Aug-2019

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reply by the author on 01-Sep-2019

Thank you for your helpful suggestion and as promised it?s the first of the month! xoxo

reply by the author on 01-Sep-2019

Thank you for your helpful suggestion and as promised it?s the first of the month! xoxo

Comment from lyenochka

Excellent

Beautiful cinquain! I only knew "swash" as part of "swashbuckler" but now I know that it has another meaning. And I really like how you made the first and last lines antonyms with the middle of the poem showing us a romance between sea and shore.

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 Comment Written 21-Aug-2019

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reply by the author on 21-Aug-2019

Thank you so much! This is my first attempt at something like this so I wasn?t sure how it would read! I appreciate the encouragement! xoxo