Comment from humpwhistle

Excellent

An excellent first Essence poem.
It's truly poetic. Some attempts meet the criteria,
but lack poetry.

Your last line is fine. But you might consider: as it blows o'er the hill

Just a thought.

Best of luck.

Peace, Lee

 Comment Written 13-Sep-2018

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reply by the author on 13-Sep-2018

Great thought. I wanted to use the but I couldn't find a way get it to work within the syllable count. I never thought of the more poetic version. Thanks you've been most helpful. Also much appreciate the excellent rating.

Comment from Sally Law

Excellent

You did great, no need to agonize! I think every writer over analyzes themselves. The picture you used was very hunting and beautiful. I could see the wind in the picture billowing over the hill. Thank you for this piece it was very well done. All my kindest regards to you and your family. Sally

 Comment Written 13-Sep-2018

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reply by the author on 13-Sep-2018

Thank you Sally Law. Your rating and kind comments mean more than words can truly express. Best regards to you and yours.

reply by Sally Law on 13-Sep-2018

Haunting, not hunting. Good grief. See what I mean? Maybe I do need to critique a little better...it really was a great work. I am not wrong about that.

Comment from Kelly Grim

Excellent

This is really good. This seems a tough form to write with pretty strict limitations but i think you did a fine job. The notion of the wind with a mind going where it will is great. The pic and presentation are dark and are wonderful! Nicely done!

 Comment Written 13-Sep-2018

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reply by the author on 13-Sep-2018

Thank you. I really appreciate the rating and comments. It was hard for me. It was my third attempt after stalling out on two other different ones.

Comment from Jannypan (Jan)

Excellent

I enjoyed your essence poem, Mystery Author. Everything seems to be in correct form. These are difficult to write given the strict syllable count and internal rhyme. Your picture is a nice pairing with your well-chosen words. Thanks for sharing. Best wishes. Jan

 Comment Written 13-Sep-2018

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reply by the author on 13-Sep-2018

Thank you. I am most grateful for the rating with your kind and encouraging words.

Comment from Earl Corp

Excellent

As far as I can see this poem fits the criteria for the contest. Rating this short piece of work with 150 characters is rough. The picture and color really enhance the reading experience. Good luck in the contest.

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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 13-Sep-2018

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reply by the author on 13-Sep-2018

Thank you. Your high rating and encouraging words are most appreciated.

Comment from Sis Cat

Excellent

This is a fine two line poem that reminds me of something in the Bible about the wind going where it wants to go. Your well rhymes essence poem speaks a truth in a few words. It also flows smoothly as one sentence.

Thank you for sharing. I wish you contest success.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 13-Sep-2018

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reply by the author on 13-Sep-2018

Thank you so much for the rating and your comments. Yes, I believe it was God's word that gave me the first line.