Daylight Streams
Senryu: Hoping for relief16 total reviews
Comment from persevere
The temporary relief of sunlight is clearly portrayed in this senryu. Over time one wonders whether night terrors are ever overcome.This piece of work is thought provoking and I wish you luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2018
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The temporary relief of sunlight is clearly portrayed in this senryu. Over time one wonders whether night terrors are ever overcome.This piece of work is thought provoking and I wish you luck in the contest.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2018
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Hello!
So pleased you enjoyed!
Thank you for your kind and thoughtful review!
Comment from Debbie Pope
I enjoyed your poem. Hopefully it is not what you are feeling right now. But it is so true for moments in my life. To date, sunlight has usually brought much relief. I feel that the feelings of your poem are inevitable though or at least they hang as a possibility. Not much of review, but it tells what your poem made me think of. Good luck.
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2018
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I enjoyed your poem. Hopefully it is not what you are feeling right now. But it is so true for moments in my life. To date, sunlight has usually brought much relief. I feel that the feelings of your poem are inevitable though or at least they hang as a possibility. Not much of review, but it tells what your poem made me think of. Good luck.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2018
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Hello!
Thank you for your kind and thoughtful review.
Comment from Ricky1024
This Senryu was well written with great theme and imagery.
It flowed well and read well with no grammar issues as well.
Adjective Content was aligned well with Objective Content and Descriptive Measures aligned perfectly.
Good luck with this.
Dr Ricky 1024.
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2018
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This Senryu was well written with great theme and imagery.
It flowed well and read well with no grammar issues as well.
Adjective Content was aligned well with Objective Content and Descriptive Measures aligned perfectly.
Good luck with this.
Dr Ricky 1024.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2018
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Hello!
Thank you for your thoughtful review!
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
I liked your write but would have preferred the last night to have been more positive, something like 'peaceful rest ensued' or something like that. Because your night terrors are fading surely peaceful rest followed? This is just my feelings about your write, it is your write and your choice, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2018
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I liked your write but would have preferred the last night to have been more positive, something like 'peaceful rest ensued' or something like that. Because your night terrors are fading surely peaceful rest followed? This is just my feelings about your write, it is your write and your choice, love Dolly x
Comment Written 20-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2018
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Hello!
Thank you for your thoughtful review. I wrote the last line as it is as a senryu usually contains irony. One would think that "peaceful rest followed," but in this case it is just the opposite.
Comment from James H. Oldfield
Excellent, this one has so much to say, in so few words.
Nothing at all to fault, this is a really good poem.
Great job.
Take care.
-James
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reply by the author on 20-Jan-2018
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Excellent, this one has so much to say, in so few words.
Nothing at all to fault, this is a really good poem.
Great job.
Take care.
-James
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 20-Jan-2018
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Hello!
Honored.
Thank you for your kind review.
Comment from Sharon Haiste
This is well done for the 'Senry Poetry' writing prompt.
Well written and well said. The beautiful picture is a good match as well.
Thank you for sharing this and good luck to you with the competition.
Sharon
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2018
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This is well done for the 'Senry Poetry' writing prompt.
Well written and well said. The beautiful picture is a good match as well.
Thank you for sharing this and good luck to you with the competition.
Sharon
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Jan-2018
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2018
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Hello Sharon,
So pleased you enjoyed!
Thank you!