Selections For Book Project
Viewing comments for Chapter 30 "M1 Carbine Musings"possible selections for inclusion in book project
16 total reviews
Comment from catch22
Hi Mikey, I don't think you've gotten into the mind of a sniper but a serial killer instead. I don't know much about military psychology but this poem describes a sociopath and not all soldiers fall into that mindset. Good use of rhythm and rhyme in this free verse though.
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Hi Mikey, I don't think you've gotten into the mind of a sniper but a serial killer instead. I don't know much about military psychology but this poem describes a sociopath and not all soldiers fall into that mindset. Good use of rhythm and rhyme in this free verse though.
Comment Written 12-Nov-2017
Comment from apky
You have certainly written a great poem, Michael, free verse which I always find more enjoyable to read. You still included those amazing rhythms, making the words move in themselves with great choreography.
Simply wonderful.
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You have certainly written a great poem, Michael, free verse which I always find more enjoyable to read. You still included those amazing rhythms, making the words move in themselves with great choreography.
Simply wonderful.
Comment Written 12-Nov-2017
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I enjoyed reading your challenge entry. It makes one think. I wish there were no wars, no weapons, but that would be a prefect world. Not our world. Thank you for sharing.
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I enjoyed reading your challenge entry. It makes one think. I wish there were no wars, no weapons, but that would be a prefect world. Not our world. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 12-Nov-2017
Comment from Heather Knight
This is a great poem, Michael. Even though it's free verse, the rhythm is wonderful.
I love this:
bouncing on the hill
like marbles dropped
from a cloud
Thanks for sharing.
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This is a great poem, Michael. Even though it's free verse, the rhythm is wonderful.
I love this:
bouncing on the hill
like marbles dropped
from a cloud
Thanks for sharing.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 12-Nov-2017
Comment from BOO ghost
You are a sniper! them M-1 carbines were tough weapons. They could eat sand and spit it out. This was a beauty! talking about being creative. Oh no,
a souvenir from my
long reaching arm
enters the chamber
where your memories
are stored
I take them
and insure
there will be no more.
Yep, you will end his misery. yep,he had a family, until...
I can see you in that gully suit laying in your own fecal mater. taking a breath and holding it, and the crisp pull of the trigger with your finger tip. Loved it, Mikey! Good thing I was not thinking sniper. I put six bullets into the magazine and wait for Zipper heads. Crack! crack! Awesome! this is great!
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You are a sniper! them M-1 carbines were tough weapons. They could eat sand and spit it out. This was a beauty! talking about being creative. Oh no,
a souvenir from my
long reaching arm
enters the chamber
where your memories
are stored
I take them
and insure
there will be no more.
Yep, you will end his misery. yep,he had a family, until...
I can see you in that gully suit laying in your own fecal mater. taking a breath and holding it, and the crisp pull of the trigger with your finger tip. Loved it, Mikey! Good thing I was not thinking sniper. I put six bullets into the magazine and wait for Zipper heads. Crack! crack! Awesome! this is great!
Comment Written 12-Nov-2017
Comment from Ricky1024
War is war and always will be always ends with the shot of a rifle into a human being to end the suffering of War we did it to Japan with the Hiroshima nuclear explosion and Nagasaki finally the Imperial Army surrendered even though they were Imperial to us there will be one day perhaps a World War 3 and God knows destruction this will cause I wrote a piece entitled 5015 the future of this planet and even though there is a World War 3 and 4 which is an attack from an outside aliens Source in the planet is mostly charred and burned it still are survivors and it eventually does not die that way the earth I believe will be knocked out of orbit possibly by that World War 4 alien striking the missiles into the sun where it will accelerate along with other previous human beings on the planet good right doctor Ricky 1024
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War is war and always will be always ends with the shot of a rifle into a human being to end the suffering of War we did it to Japan with the Hiroshima nuclear explosion and Nagasaki finally the Imperial Army surrendered even though they were Imperial to us there will be one day perhaps a World War 3 and God knows destruction this will cause I wrote a piece entitled 5015 the future of this planet and even though there is a World War 3 and 4 which is an attack from an outside aliens Source in the planet is mostly charred and burned it still are survivors and it eventually does not die that way the earth I believe will be knocked out of orbit possibly by that World War 4 alien striking the missiles into the sun where it will accelerate along with other previous human beings on the planet good right doctor Ricky 1024
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 12-Nov-2017