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Viewing comments for Chapter 31 "with the wink of an eye"
possible selections for inclusion in book project

19 total reviews 
Comment from sandy montgomery
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Creative and just plain awesome. I loved this poem from the daisy's perspective. Convincingly written and just a wonderful read. How I wish I had six stars to give. I really enjoyed it. Thank you for sharing your work.

 Comment Written 11-Nov-2017

Comment from Sandra du Plessis
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A very well-written ekphrastic free verse poem about the battle for life not only humans have to fight for a place in the sun. The little flower seed struggled through mud and darkness to find the light of the sun.

 Comment Written 11-Nov-2017

Comment from Sharon Haiste
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A lovely poem.
Well written and well rhymed, and it plays well with the picture.
Ending with the question is clever.
Well done.
Thank you for sharing this with us.
Sharon

 Comment Written 11-Nov-2017

Comment from rama devi
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Wow, dear MIke, this is incredibly original and imaginative. Love the POV of the root shooting through cement cracks in the sidewalk. Superb extended metaphor in outstanding free verse style that uses formatting of indents and line breaks to sculpt phrasing and cadences to good effect for an effective delivery.

I am not quite sure what the closing means. I found it startling, which is good, but confusing, which is not necessarily bad...but I am jet lagging, so it might be just me.

Outstanding phrase and personification plus consonance of S:

the hush of darkness
whispers its plan
through the tiniest crack


LOve this too:
ancient tales
of light
arrive
through the seepage


Superb assonance of EE and EA here:

dampness
keeps hope shivering

unseen
'neath the clean
cement sea

Recommend reconsidering this cliche image and phrasing:

in the blink of an eye


Great job - almost a six, but I have none left...

Love,
rd

 Comment Written 11-Nov-2017

Comment from Mustang Patty
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Hi, Michael;
I enjoyed your interpretation of the 'Pix this' challenge. You've told the story from the plant's point of view and it was lovely. Thank you for sharing,

~patty~

 Comment Written 11-Nov-2017

Comment from patcelaw
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All of us will have our light go out one day and fly upward. However, in the meanwhile we will endure the struggles of our lives and hopefully we will be able to bloom where we have taken root. Patricia

 Comment Written 11-Nov-2017

Comment from DR DIP
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Are you what? Gay? lol I really enjoyed this write Michael as I have said to you before, you are the thinking poet's poet. I have now read several interpretations of this picture Michael and may I say, yours is the most interesting.

dip


 Comment Written 11-Nov-2017

Comment from Heather Knight
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This is a lovely interpretation of the Picture This Challenge. I like how you personify the little daisy. And as usual, I have enjoyed your unique style.
Thanks for sharing.

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 Comment Written 11-Nov-2017

Comment from frierajac
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This is an interesting poem with the shaping and making something with
humane thoughts into the flower. The is something that makes the reader wonder
if there is a dialogue here between the person and flower or if it is a monologue of
the writer.Interesting. a virtual 6.

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 Comment Written 11-Nov-2017