Question Mark
There's no waking up from this nightmare.50 total reviews
Comment from bluedragon776
Wow, this is a really intense poem. The horror and uncertainty just leaps out at me. Yes, the whole thing feels like one big question mark because of all the goes back to that old saying of you never actually know someone. I don't pretend to understand the true reasons for suicide. but I hate to learn that parents kill their kids, partners and themselves. It's one's choice to take their own lives but killing others (especially loved ones is just selfish). Great poem.
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2017
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Wow, this is a really intense poem. The horror and uncertainty just leaps out at me. Yes, the whole thing feels like one big question mark because of all the goes back to that old saying of you never actually know someone. I don't pretend to understand the true reasons for suicide. but I hate to learn that parents kill their kids, partners and themselves. It's one's choice to take their own lives but killing others (especially loved ones is just selfish). Great poem.
Comment Written 27-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2017
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Yes, bluedragon776, at the memorial service for the family and still today people said Kevin was selfish to take his family to the grave with him. Not surprising, Kevin was buried out of state and not with his family. We will never understand the why of what he did. Thank you for your review of my intense, horrific song.
Comment from honeytree
The art work is really
great for these words
How horrible the outcome
Why does this happen
within our world
Why not share love
everyday and not kill
No way.
Honeytree
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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The art work is really
great for these words
How horrible the outcome
Why does this happen
within our world
Why not share love
everyday and not kill
No way.
Honeytree
Comment Written 27-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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Oh, thank you, Honeytree, for your heartfelt, six star review and condolences. I took the picture from the family's Memorial Site. This is how I want to remember them--smiling and laughing. Thanks again for your review and compasssionate response.
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That's fine Honeytree
Comment from GWHARGIS
First off. I'm not a crying type of person. But you nailed it with the lines , ... face a question mark. Suicide or murder, or the combo leaves nothing but questions. Your poem was stark, not romanticized and the fact that you showed so many perspectives she'd light on how many are affected by this type of tragedy. And yes, I she'd a tear. Well done! Gretchen
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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First off. I'm not a crying type of person. But you nailed it with the lines , ... face a question mark. Suicide or murder, or the combo leaves nothing but questions. Your poem was stark, not romanticized and the fact that you showed so many perspectives she'd light on how many are affected by this type of tragedy. And yes, I she'd a tear. Well done! Gretchen
Comment Written 27-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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Oh, thank you, Gretchen, for your generous, six star review of my devastating song of loss. I get testy eyed, too, when I remember the family and how they died. I just don't know why. Thanks for noting my poem was not romanticized and that it told the tragedy from multiple vantage points.
Comment from nancyjam
This is such a very sad story and it must have been difficult to
write about it and bring it all back again.
When I first read it - it was hard to understand - then I read your author notes and
it was clear. Maybe you should put a note at the top -"read author notes first"
It is a powerful piece and more so when you know the background. Good luck in the contest.
Nancy
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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This is such a very sad story and it must have been difficult to
write about it and bring it all back again.
When I first read it - it was hard to understand - then I read your author notes and
it was clear. Maybe you should put a note at the top -"read author notes first"
It is a powerful piece and more so when you know the background. Good luck in the contest.
Nancy
Comment Written 26-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 27-Sep-2017
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Thank you, Nancy, for your review and suggestion. The most common comment reviewers make is that they did not understand my song until they read the author's notes.
Yes, writing this song was difficult but cathartic because I haven't focused on my doctor and her family in ten years. I didn't want to talk about it back then, but I am glad I am writing about them now.
Thank you for wishing me good luck in the contest. It ended two days ago where this song placed third.
Thanks again for your review.
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I'm glad to hear it placed in the contest. That's wonderful. Nancy
Comment from Mitchell Brontė
Andre, this must have been a very traumatic write, having to trawl back into your memory and revisit this awful moment in time.
You have done a sterling job, you have my admiration.
Mitchell
reply by the author on 26-Sep-2017
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Andre, this must have been a very traumatic write, having to trawl back into your memory and revisit this awful moment in time.
You have done a sterling job, you have my admiration.
Mitchell
Comment Written 26-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 26-Sep-2017
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Yes, Mitchell. Ten years ago I quit my therapist because he wanted me to talk about it but I was not ready then. I feel release today facing this tragedy head on and accepting that the "Why" will never be known. Thank you for your kind review and compliments of my work.
Comment from Lulube
Oh wow, a nightmare is an understatement. A horror show!!! Love the way you broke up all the different stories, or flashes of stories. Has a bit of a sing song to it, just to keep it light. Good luck in the contest
lulube
reply by the author on 26-Sep-2017
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Oh wow, a nightmare is an understatement. A horror show!!! Love the way you broke up all the different stories, or flashes of stories. Has a bit of a sing song to it, just to keep it light. Good luck in the contest
lulube
Comment Written 26-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 26-Sep-2017
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Thank you, Lulube, for your review. My song placed third in the Worst Nightmare contest. Now I am sharing this with my songwriting class tonight. Yes, it was a horror show. Thanks again.
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What a great idea to take a songwriting course. I don't think there are anything like that in this smaller town I just moved to. bummer
lulube
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Oh and congratulations for your third in the contest
lulube
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Thank you. I am honored.
Comment from c_lucas
To be awakened, disoriented is not the best of feelings. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very interesting read. There is very good imagery.
reply by the author on 26-Sep-2017
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To be awakened, disoriented is not the best of feelings. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very interesting read. There is very good imagery.
Comment Written 26-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 26-Sep-2017
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Thank you, C_Lucas, for your review. Yes, waking can be disorienting.
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You're welcome, SC. Charlie
Comment from Hitcher
There are not many people in this world who would have had to endure the fallout of such brutal insanity. I thank my lucky stars i have not. I feel for you mate!! Definitely a poem that stops one in their tracks. Good luck, great write
reply by the author on 26-Sep-2017
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There are not many people in this world who would have had to endure the fallout of such brutal insanity. I thank my lucky stars i have not. I feel for you mate!! Definitely a poem that stops one in their tracks. Good luck, great write
Comment Written 26-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 26-Sep-2017
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Yes, Hitcher, even ten years later, I still experience the radioactive fallout from this brutal insanity. I can imagine their family--parents, siblings--who at the time did not want to talk to the press. The horror of an entire family being killed by a person we thought we knew.
Thank you for your review and condolences.
Comment from estory
I thought this was really strong, one of your all time best, actually. I really liked the repetitions that seemed to keep the experience going in circles, like a needle stuck in the groove of a record. There were all these unanswered questions, these semi connections between all sorts of people, in a kind of surreal, dream like state. People in cosmetologists offices, out walking their dog, kids playing, people passing in the street, making guesses at each other's past, connected by humanity, and yet disconnected by different experiences, and unable to break through the seperations and share their emotions. "My face a question mark" was a great refrain, a great repeating image. terrific job with this estory
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2017
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I thought this was really strong, one of your all time best, actually. I really liked the repetitions that seemed to keep the experience going in circles, like a needle stuck in the groove of a record. There were all these unanswered questions, these semi connections between all sorts of people, in a kind of surreal, dream like state. People in cosmetologists offices, out walking their dog, kids playing, people passing in the street, making guesses at each other's past, connected by humanity, and yet disconnected by different experiences, and unable to break through the seperations and share their emotions. "My face a question mark" was a great refrain, a great repeating image. terrific job with this estory
Comment Written 26-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 28-Sep-2017
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Yes, estory, Kevin was right in his suicide letter to state that people will be surprised that he killed his family and himself. He bought his gun two months earlier and moved among us as he planned--he left instructions to close the skin-care clinic, he trimmed the hedges to perfection, he held a backyard Father's Day party which coincided with Nikki's eighth birthday. The next day he took the family to the Little Farm petting zoo, after which, he shot his daughters in the back seat, his wife when she got out of the car and attempted to flee, and then himself. We have so many unanswered questions not only about why he did what he did, but if we could have stopped him if we had known.
Thank you for your generous, six star review and for calling my song one of my all time best. i appreciate it.
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Tough things to get through. You have to rely on God for redemption and salvation. I'll say a prayer for you and your family. estory
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Thank you. Much appreciated.
Comment from nomi338
I find it quite fitting that you referenced darkness in your awesome display of poetic artistry here. The darkness of mental distress that could possibly lead an otherwise sensible person to the breaking point where an unspeakable act such as this is even possible, is beyond my ability to comprehend it. I fervently pray that I am never forced to go there. What the people who do things like this can never see, is that the damage that is done to those who survive this and are left with questions. Why/ Why? Why?
reply by the author on 26-Sep-2017
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I find it quite fitting that you referenced darkness in your awesome display of poetic artistry here. The darkness of mental distress that could possibly lead an otherwise sensible person to the breaking point where an unspeakable act such as this is even possible, is beyond my ability to comprehend it. I fervently pray that I am never forced to go there. What the people who do things like this can never see, is that the damage that is done to those who survive this and are left with questions. Why/ Why? Why?
Comment Written 26-Sep-2017
reply by the author on 26-Sep-2017
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Yes, nomi338, even though Kevin explained in his suicide note that his family was under financial stress because of his wife's skin-care clinic, it does not explain why he could not get help or, at the very least, let the business go and focus on the family. How could he shoot his own wife and daughters in the head? Those who knew them kept asking "Why? Why? Why?" Thank you for your review.