Left Behind
lune contest 5/3/526 total reviews
Comment from Jannypan (Jan)
You are right. Our treatment from those who know & should do better is atrocious when it comes to our Vets. We would not be here writing this/reviewing this poem if not for our Vets. They should be at the top of the list of things to fix. Thank you for speaking for them. Jan
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2017
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You are right. Our treatment from those who know & should do better is atrocious when it comes to our Vets. We would not be here writing this/reviewing this poem if not for our Vets. They should be at the top of the list of things to fix. Thank you for speaking for them. Jan
Comment Written 25-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2017
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Thank you for backing up my thoughts on the Vets situation. None of take enough time to consider, what these men have been through. And all of us in US should be ashamed there is not a service requirement in this country. It does not have to be the military, just a two year service of any kind. It could include health care, street cleaning, or working in a nursing home.
Comment from MSJVClarke
This is a very meaningful poem. It's short and sweet but the simplicity of the words tell a very strong story. I choose to read it as a soldier who lost a very important part of his life and left behind the dog tags so as not to have the bad memory.
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2017
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This is a very meaningful poem. It's short and sweet but the simplicity of the words tell a very strong story. I choose to read it as a soldier who lost a very important part of his life and left behind the dog tags so as not to have the bad memory.
Comment Written 25-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2017
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You chose to read it correctly Thank you for the review.
Comment from emptypage
You've created a mystery for me here. Why were the dog tags left behind in this old, beaten truck? Which military man left them, and why? Was he too traumatized by the war to want the tags anymore. Did he kill himself in this truck? The possibilities are endless.
Very thought provoking piece.
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2017
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You've created a mystery for me here. Why were the dog tags left behind in this old, beaten truck? Which military man left them, and why? Was he too traumatized by the war to want the tags anymore. Did he kill himself in this truck? The possibilities are endless.
Very thought provoking piece.
Comment Written 25-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 25-Jun-2017
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"Was he to traumatized by war to want the tags anymore" - that was exactly my point. Plus, he or she could not keep their lives together therefore the truck was deserted. Thank you for this very insightful review.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written Lune. The once shiny Chevy is now left behind to rust and decay in the weather, just like the soldiers once young and full of fire are now left on the street without hope or a future.
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2017
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A very well-written Lune. The once shiny Chevy is now left behind to rust and decay in the weather, just like the soldiers once young and full of fire are now left on the street without hope or a future.
Comment Written 23-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2017
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Yes, exactly. This is a very insightful review. Thank you.
Comment from kiwigirl2821
Hi Val. This is a great Lune piece of writing. I love your subject matter too. We do a lot of "celebrating" however, sometimes I too think it's misdirected. You use great descriptive words to make your point. Good luck. xoxo Kiwi
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2017
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Hi Val. This is a great Lune piece of writing. I love your subject matter too. We do a lot of "celebrating" however, sometimes I too think it's misdirected. You use great descriptive words to make your point. Good luck. xoxo Kiwi
Comment Written 23-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2017
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Thank you, Kiwi, and I agree wholeheartedly.
Comment from l.raven
HI Val, I am with you sweet girl...these men and women give their lives for us...I don't think some people really see that...they die for people they have never met...they should be honored for the rest of their lives...very well written...and a perfect picture...love ya Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2017
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HI Val, I am with you sweet girl...these men and women give their lives for us...I don't think some people really see that...they die for people they have never met...they should be honored for the rest of their lives...very well written...and a perfect picture...love ya Linda xxoo
Comment Written 23-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2017
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Thank you, Linda, and know people just don't get this. I personally feel there should be a two year mandatory service requirement. They have to go into the armed forces, but everyone can contribute in other ways. There is an extreme disconnect in this country, that really disturbs me.
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yes there is Val...we are in a sad state...your so welcome my sweet friend...love xxoo
Comment from lalajovanoski
Hello friend I really enjoyed reading this poem I think that this is a good entry for the contest and should do well good luck to you I like the structure in the flow thank you for sharing this
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2017
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Hello friend I really enjoyed reading this poem I think that this is a good entry for the contest and should do well good luck to you I like the structure in the flow thank you for sharing this
Comment Written 23-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2017
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Thank you for the review.
Comment from Dean Kuch
As a veteran of our nation's United States Marine Corps, Val, I couldn't agree with you more about the way this country often neglects its veterans.
That should NEVER happen, regardless of what war they happened to be involved in.
Good job, and good luck!
~Dean
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2017
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As a veteran of our nation's United States Marine Corps, Val, I couldn't agree with you more about the way this country often neglects its veterans.
That should NEVER happen, regardless of what war they happened to be involved in.
Good job, and good luck!
~Dean
Comment Written 22-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2017
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You were a Marine! Love that Dean. I have two Naval Academy Grads in my family. Also, this little thing was written for an old friend that served in Nam. I just wish there was any kind of demanded service, from all our citizens . Not that one would have to be in the military, but just sweeping the streets or helping out some way. Thank you for the review, please skip the glittery flag next time. LOL
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You're welcome.
Comment from Irish Rain
How beautifully, sadly, true. 'Dog tags left behind' to rust, as the rest of so many of their lives have done. Unappreciated, unacknowledged...deafening, the sound of those not here. Blessings....
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2017
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How beautifully, sadly, true. 'Dog tags left behind' to rust, as the rest of so many of their lives have done. Unappreciated, unacknowledged...deafening, the sound of those not here. Blessings....
Comment Written 22-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2017
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Thank you for your insightful review.
Comment from RodG
I really like how the picture and poem work together here.
Easy to visualize the rusty truck left deserted somewhere.
The last line is terrific because it can be read in two TONES. One way is amusing as we see the old license plates left on the truck. But if we regard them AND.the truck metaphorically/symbolically, we are reminded of dead soldiers lying on beaches like Normandy. Well done! Rod
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2017
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I really like how the picture and poem work together here.
Easy to visualize the rusty truck left deserted somewhere.
The last line is terrific because it can be read in two TONES. One way is amusing as we see the old license plates left on the truck. But if we regard them AND.the truck metaphorically/symbolically, we are reminded of dead soldiers lying on beaches like Normandy. Well done! Rod
Comment Written 22-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 22-Jun-2017
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Your second "tone" was my intention, but I honestly can see how the first would work too. My intention was to combine the idea of an abandoned old truck with the dog tags left in it, to show how we have abandoned so many of our Vets. I'm from a Navy family, so the subject is near and dear to my heart. I love it when my work brings up different ideas. Your exceptional made my day, and truly treasure the ones I receive. Great review. My deepest thanks.
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You are most welcome. Rod