2017 JAPANESE POETRY
Viewing comments for Chapter 36 "Senryu (he holds grandpa's hand)"A collection of Japanese poetry
27 total reviews
Comment from Grasshopper2
Haijin-Sensei,
I really like this one, especially the first two lines. Your satori (for me) is slightly off based on your notes. Think about "cycle of life" changed to "cycle of love." Either way, I enjyed reading.
Grasshopper
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
Haijin-Sensei,
I really like this one, especially the first two lines. Your satori (for me) is slightly off based on your notes. Think about "cycle of life" changed to "cycle of love." Either way, I enjyed reading.
Grasshopper
Comment Written 06-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
-
I said cycle of life because we start our lives fragility and dependent on others and we end our lives the same way.
Thank you for the review and feedback.
Gypsy
-
I now am enlightened, Haijin-Sensei. It is sad to end the way we begin, but that is life.
-
Yes, that's life :)
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written senryu. Just to see a young child helping his grandpa is a wonderful sight to see. Today most of the younger generation have too many activities to find time for their parents or grandparents.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
A very well-written senryu. Just to see a young child helping his grandpa is a wonderful sight to see. Today most of the younger generation have too many activities to find time for their parents or grandparents.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
-
Thank you for the review and kind words.
Gypsy
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
This is so true and we go full circle don't we? A poignant warm write, both my grand fathers died before I got to know them, but I enjoyed the company of my grand mothers, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
This is so true and we go full circle don't we? A poignant warm write, both my grand fathers died before I got to know them, but I enjoyed the company of my grand mothers, love Dolly x
Comment Written 06-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
-
Thank you for the review and kind words, my friend.
Gypsy
Comment from Lindagail Hall
What a great thing to see, when all we hear nowadays is how the youth don't care enough about family. I like your word choice and love the ending.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
What a great thing to see, when all we hear nowadays is how the youth don't care enough about family. I like your word choice and love the ending.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
-
Thank you for the review and kind words my friend
Gypsy
Comment from MizKat
Hi Gypsy,
I loved reading your poem as you're always great at writing them.
The picture of the old man fits well with the poem too.
I always look forward to read the poetry that you write.
Kat
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
Hi Gypsy,
I loved reading your poem as you're always great at writing them.
The picture of the old man fits well with the poem too.
I always look forward to read the poetry that you write.
Kat
Comment Written 06-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
-
Thank you for the review and kind words
Gypsy
-
You're very thankful, Gypsy. Kat
Comment from Bill Schott
This senryu, He Holds Grandpa's Hand, uses sixteen syllables to create a scene where the roles reverse and a child shall lead us. Having that child in our lives will be our reward.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
This senryu, He Holds Grandpa's Hand, uses sixteen syllables to create a scene where the roles reverse and a child shall lead us. Having that child in our lives will be our reward.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
-
Thank you for the review.
Gypsy
Comment from Rasmine
Hello, Gypsy!
Good senryu! I think that people should care for the older people instead of locking them away in nursing homes. This society has become a throw-away culture. If you don't want to deal with them, put them in a nursing home.
Thank you, for this. :)
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
Hello, Gypsy!
Good senryu! I think that people should care for the older people instead of locking them away in nursing homes. This society has become a throw-away culture. If you don't want to deal with them, put them in a nursing home.
Thank you, for this. :)
Comment Written 06-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
-
Thank you for the review and kind words sweetie pie.
Gypsy
Comment from Mark Valentine
My mom recently moved in with us and I often have to hold her hand as she walks, so this one really hit home. You touch upon an aspect of our existence that makes us think about the big picture - "cycle of life" sums it up. Well done, Gypsy.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
My mom recently moved in with us and I often have to hold her hand as she walks, so this one really hit home. You touch upon an aspect of our existence that makes us think about the big picture - "cycle of life" sums it up. Well done, Gypsy.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
-
Thank you for the review and kind words, my friend. I'm happy for you and your mom.
Gypsy
Comment from apky
That's our natural cycle of life indeed. We actually live it cycle after cycle yet we're too arrogant or ignorant to let the rest of nature too, "live" their own seasons as divinely as it was created to do.
Great, my friend.
Akin
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
That's our natural cycle of life indeed. We actually live it cycle after cycle yet we're too arrogant or ignorant to let the rest of nature too, "live" their own seasons as divinely as it was created to do.
Great, my friend.
Akin
Comment Written 06-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
-
Thank you for the review and kind words my friend
Gypsy
Comment from Hitcher
Nice! My girls still hold my hand at times when we are out and for that I am very happy. I'm guessing that will change as the get older though. A great little senryu created from your observation Gypsy : )
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
Nice! My girls still hold my hand at times when we are out and for that I am very happy. I'm guessing that will change as the get older though. A great little senryu created from your observation Gypsy : )
Comment Written 06-Jun-2017
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2017
-
Thank you, Wayne, I appreciate your review and kind words.
Gypsy