Reviews from

2017 JAPANESE POETRY

Viewing comments for Chapter 16 "haibun (moving means)"
A collection of Japanese poetry

25 total reviews 
Comment from zanya
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Wow a topic rooted in many hearts -Moving - and how to go about it as painlessly as possible!! Well documented here in this Haibun prose without too much emotional entanglement as the Haiku serves to remind us wither comes the pain !

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
    Thank you very much for reading, my friend :) Thank you for the six stars... how did you have six stars this late in the week? I am not complaining. I am out of sixes by Tuesday. LoL

    namaste,


    Gypsy Haijin Sensei
    Fanstory Instructor and Poet
    Member of the Haiku Society of America
    ~*~ a new haiku class every month ~*~
    <>Haiga class starts on May 1st <>
Comment from MizKat
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hi Gypsy,

Again you've done a great job in writing your poem.
I enjoyed reading it as it was very good.
Thanks for sharing this with all of your friends on here.

Kat

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
    Thank you very much for reading, my friend :)

    namaste,


    Gypsy Haijin Sensei
    Fanstory Instructor and Poet
    Member of the Haiku Society of America
    ~*~ a new haiku class every month ~*~
    <>Haiga class starts on May 1st <>
reply by MizKat on 17-Apr-2017
    Hi Gypsy,

    I love reading what you write as you are so good at writing them.

    Kat
Comment from judiverse
Excellent
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It's been many years since we last moved, and I certainly wouldn't go through that again. It's good to get rid of some of the things you accumulated over the years. Sometimes you have to keep something that's practical, not just because it brings you joy. Certainly a good way to look at your wardrobe. I tossed a few things that I simply didn't like into the Goodwill bag. Good luck with your move and hope you're all settled in now. Excellent concluding Haiku. Sometimes we have to let go of those things from the past. That makes me feel for those who have to give up a lot of things when they move into a retirement home for instance. judi

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
    I feel sad for those folks who have to give up their homes and most of their possessions to move into a retirement home. It breaks my heart. I hope I never have to do that and I am able to live independently until I die. But who knows what is best? At least they are alive. Okay, I take it back. LOL Anyway... I know what you mean.

    Thank you very much for reading, have a great weekend,

    Gypsy
reply by judiverse on 15-Apr-2017
    You're welcome. Have a lovely Easter, and may the writing force be with you. judi
Comment from apky
Excellent
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GBR, I'm still going through the moving process.
Lots of boxes I keep opening and pusing aside for
various reasons: no space for these... can wait till I've organised that... must be packed again until there's space in that room..
I know it so well.
Best,
Apky

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
    Thank you very much for reading, have a great weekend,

    Gypsy
Comment from Grasshopper2
Excellent
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Lady Blue,
Moving...make it an adventure. A time to declutter your soul as well as all that stuff. This is an excellent haibun, a poignant moment in time that you are experiencing. Good luck in the contest. Thank you for posting.

Michael

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
    Thank you very much for reading, have a great weekend,

    Gypsy
Comment from TAB_that's me
Excellent
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Your prose is fairly tight. I like to see it a little more terse. It is all in the present tense. Your haiku expands on the prose yet it does take it in a different direct especially with the satori. Very good over all:)

(I took the haibun class from sgalletti a couple of years ago)

teresa

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
    Thank you very much for reading, have a great weekend,

    Gypsy
Comment from jusylee72
Excellent
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wonderful true Haibun relating to life in such a close yet loving way. We can't move on into will rid ourselves of the junk in our lives. Great job on this one good luck in the contest

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
    Thank you very much for reading, have a great weekend,

    Gypsy
Comment from Rasmine
Excellent
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Good haiban. My Grammarly says it's a misspelling (but it also says that Grammarly is a misspelling. Shake my head.
I liked your poem--I know about getting rid of stuff. It's hard.
I'm missing a broken wooden dragon--think it was thrown out by accident. :(
Happy Easter.

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
    Thank you very much for reading, have a great weekend,

    Gypsy
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Excellent
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I rather like the Haibun - you've worded this so well,
Gypsy -

moving's
time to let go of the past--
our love in a box

This one particularly appeals to me, as we are doing just that - the house is sold but we are intending to down-size and are still looking for a suitable place, but in the meantime, it's made us have a good clear out - declutter - giving lots away to charity, and also letting the family take away items that mean something to them. One collects so much over the years and there are some things that one just can't let go of.

Margaret

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
    Thank you very much for reading, have a great weekend,

    Gypsy
Comment from Sis Cat
Excellent
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Yes, our love's is in a box. In fact, it is in many boxes. I remember you telling me in your class you were moving. This haibun is a snapshot of the process--I moved two weeks ago but I am still unpacking. Ha! I know from experience that some boxes may never get unpacked. Then there is the agonizing thing of downsizing and giving away things. You end your prose with a haiku summing up this love and pain:

 moving's
time to let go of the past--
our love in a box

Thank you for sharing. I wish you success in the contest and in unpacking!

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2017


reply by the author on 15-Apr-2017
    Thank you very much for reading and the wonderful feedback, Andre, have a great weekend,

    Gypsy