Nashville Trashville - Chapter 2
Just Say no...(continued)22 total reviews
Comment from Thomas Bowling
Great story and great looking kids. Your husband must be handsome. My secretary came into my office and saw a picture of my kids. She said, "Wow, you must have been handsome when you were young."
She was good at her job. I hated to fire her.
You shouldn't have said you fell down. I would have thought you were praying.
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2016
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Great story and great looking kids. Your husband must be handsome. My secretary came into my office and saw a picture of my kids. She said, "Wow, you must have been handsome when you were young."
She was good at her job. I hated to fire her.
You shouldn't have said you fell down. I would have thought you were praying.
Comment Written 06-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2016
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Thank you, Thomas, for the RR&R and compliment. LOL on the firing. My desert feet did not do well on ice. I prayed each time I hit the ground-- that nothing snapped or broke :) Have a great week, and thanks again for your continued interest.
Comment from MelB
You were certainly right to question these four guys. There is no profile for a rapist unfortunately. You can never be too safe these days.
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2016
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You were certainly right to question these four guys. There is no profile for a rapist unfortunately. You can never be too safe these days.
Comment Written 06-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2016
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Your not kidding, Melissa, and your right about the profiling. I appreciate your RR&R and continued interest in my work. Have a wonderful week!
Comment from Gloria ....
This is a hoot, Mary. I very much enjoy your "voice" as it's one of a mother who is very much the responsible one, and is also still young enough to enjoy the great fun of adult children.
What a blast, I can't to read what happens next. I think you've got a good one here. The love among you all is palpable.
Great job!
Gloria
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2016
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This is a hoot, Mary. I very much enjoy your "voice" as it's one of a mother who is very much the responsible one, and is also still young enough to enjoy the great fun of adult children.
What a blast, I can't to read what happens next. I think you've got a good one here. The love among you all is palpable.
Great job!
Gloria
Comment Written 06-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2016
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Hi Gloria, thank you so very much for your RR&R and continued interest in Nashville Trashville :) I hope to have the next chapter up before the weekend, but it depends on how well my two year old dictator grandson cooperates to that end! Have a wonderful week, Gloria.
Comment from jlsavell
Mary,
Cannot wait for the next episode. Absolutely. Hey, I think I have been there, done all that, and even in the same church!!! Aww the life of our children and the stories we can tell.
Funny story. A few years back one of my sons had come to Houston with several of his co workers for a weeks safety seminar. By several I mean 10. He had asked me to join them all for dinner. I felt so honored. My son wanting me to have dinner with he and his peers. The night progressed with swapping stories of each ones childhood, place of birth, etc, etc, etc...after a while Steven needed to excuse hinself for the gentleman's room and pulled my chair out as a gesture to follow him. The table started laughing as sneered in fun he really was a Mamas boy. I followed him with a puzzling look on my face and asked him why he neeed my assistance, after all, he hadn't needed me since he learned to keep his superman briefs unsoiled.
He leaned in my ear and said," no Mom, this is assurance you are not going to tell them I sucked on your boobs till I was almost 3! " I assured him it was not sucking on boobs, it was nursing , a perfectly healthy normal thing. "Really Mom? Then why, oh why, everytime you tell it, it becomes the centre of my being? No, I cannot risk that. You are held hostage, right here. "
Well I never realized he felt so strongly about veing called the boob man... lol..
Okay, so enouh of my crazy story, yours is much more interesting.
Loved it
Jimi
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2016
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Mary,
Cannot wait for the next episode. Absolutely. Hey, I think I have been there, done all that, and even in the same church!!! Aww the life of our children and the stories we can tell.
Funny story. A few years back one of my sons had come to Houston with several of his co workers for a weeks safety seminar. By several I mean 10. He had asked me to join them all for dinner. I felt so honored. My son wanting me to have dinner with he and his peers. The night progressed with swapping stories of each ones childhood, place of birth, etc, etc, etc...after a while Steven needed to excuse hinself for the gentleman's room and pulled my chair out as a gesture to follow him. The table started laughing as sneered in fun he really was a Mamas boy. I followed him with a puzzling look on my face and asked him why he neeed my assistance, after all, he hadn't needed me since he learned to keep his superman briefs unsoiled.
He leaned in my ear and said," no Mom, this is assurance you are not going to tell them I sucked on your boobs till I was almost 3! " I assured him it was not sucking on boobs, it was nursing , a perfectly healthy normal thing. "Really Mom? Then why, oh why, everytime you tell it, it becomes the centre of my being? No, I cannot risk that. You are held hostage, right here. "
Well I never realized he felt so strongly about veing called the boob man... lol..
Okay, so enouh of my crazy story, yours is much more interesting.
Loved it
Jimi
Comment Written 06-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2016
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Jimi, that story of yours is a hoot! How funny that your son worried so much he pulled you aside for the "topic lockdown" come to Jesus meeting! Is this the same son that wrote that beautiful, moving letter from Afghanistan?
I hope to get the next chapter up before the weekend, all dependant on my little two year old dictator! He's sleeping now so I'm trying to catch up on thanking reviewers! I appreciate your RR&R and continued interest in my work, Jimi.
I hope you are healing up well and quickly!
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Good chapter. You have nice-looking kids. And you look great, yourself. Certainly not too old to have some fun in a bar. :)
dropping my daughter and I at the church <-- Common mistake but one that is easy to see once you learn how to tell. Here's a copypaste from Grammar Rules 1:
Me or I?
The word "I" is a subject pronoun. The word "me" is an object pronoun that will follow 1) transitive verbs (that take an object) and 2) prepositions such as to, for, from, by, with, between, and so on.
Examples
I have a book.
This book belongs to me.
These are obvious, right? Yes, but a problem occurs when we add a second person. Which sentence below is correct?:
Dad loaned the car to Mary and I.
Dad loaned the car to Mary and me.
The second one is correct. How can you tell? Just remove the other person's name, and it's obvious:
Obviously wrong: Dad loaned the car to I.
Therefore wrong: Dad loaned the car to Mary and I.
Obviously right: Dad loaned the car to me.
Therefore right: Dad loaned the car to Mary and me.
Always check by removing the other person, and you will not make this mistake in the future.
Examples with prepositions:
Wrong: Dad came with Mom and I.
Right: Dad came with Mom and me.
Why: Dad came with me. (Remove Mom.)
Wrong: Mark sits behind Jen and I.
Right: Mark sits behind Jen and me.
Why: Mark sits behind me. (Remove Jen.)
Wrong: This is between Jill and I.
Right: This is between Jill and me.
Why: This is [for] me.
(Remove Jill and use a different preposition if "between" doesn't make sense with just one person.)
Examples with transitive verbs:
Wrong: Jack beat Ben and I at Monopoly.
Right: Jack beat Ben and me at Monopoly.
Why: Jack beat me at Monopoly. (Remove Ben.)
Wrong: Dad punished Barb and I.
Right: Dad punished Barb and me.
Why: Dad punished me. (Remove Barb.)
________
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2016
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Good chapter. You have nice-looking kids. And you look great, yourself. Certainly not too old to have some fun in a bar. :)
dropping my daughter and I at the church <-- Common mistake but one that is easy to see once you learn how to tell. Here's a copypaste from Grammar Rules 1:
Me or I?
The word "I" is a subject pronoun. The word "me" is an object pronoun that will follow 1) transitive verbs (that take an object) and 2) prepositions such as to, for, from, by, with, between, and so on.
Examples
I have a book.
This book belongs to me.
These are obvious, right? Yes, but a problem occurs when we add a second person. Which sentence below is correct?:
Dad loaned the car to Mary and I.
Dad loaned the car to Mary and me.
The second one is correct. How can you tell? Just remove the other person's name, and it's obvious:
Obviously wrong: Dad loaned the car to I.
Therefore wrong: Dad loaned the car to Mary and I.
Obviously right: Dad loaned the car to me.
Therefore right: Dad loaned the car to Mary and me.
Always check by removing the other person, and you will not make this mistake in the future.
Examples with prepositions:
Wrong: Dad came with Mom and I.
Right: Dad came with Mom and me.
Why: Dad came with me. (Remove Mom.)
Wrong: Mark sits behind Jen and I.
Right: Mark sits behind Jen and me.
Why: Mark sits behind me. (Remove Jen.)
Wrong: This is between Jill and I.
Right: This is between Jill and me.
Why: This is [for] me.
(Remove Jill and use a different preposition if "between" doesn't make sense with just one person.)
Examples with transitive verbs:
Wrong: Jack beat Ben and I at Monopoly.
Right: Jack beat Ben and me at Monopoly.
Why: Jack beat me at Monopoly. (Remove Ben.)
Wrong: Dad punished Barb and I.
Right: Dad punished Barb and me.
Why: Dad punished me. (Remove Barb.)
________
Comment Written 06-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2016
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Hi Phyllis, thank you so much for the very helpful explanation of the me vs. I. You are a great instructor. I am going to copy and paste your review to a word document and save it for future reference. Thank you so much!!
I ended up changing the line to:
Squealing tires signaled my son speeding off for the Nashville bar scene after dropping us off at the Church of the Assumption.
I appreciate your continued follow, counsel, and interest in my work. Have an amazing week!
Comment from Barb Hensongispsaca
Has to have a six because of the humor, honesty, interest, and most of all Bruni. As a mother, I love her insight.lol
Very well written and I look forward to the next.
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2016
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Has to have a six because of the humor, honesty, interest, and most of all Bruni. As a mother, I love her insight.lol
Very well written and I look forward to the next.
Comment Written 06-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2016
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Hi Barb, thank you so much for your RR&R and the fabulous SIX! I so appreciate your continued follow and interest in my work. I am so happy you found this worthy of an elusive sixer. I hope to post the next chapter this week; all dependant on how well my two year old grandson, the mini- dictator cooperates! Have a great week!
Comment from bichonfrisegirl
Hahaha ... you are such a MOTHER, Mary! And I mean that in the best sense possible. :)
I loved this delightful tale of a mother's angst while accompanying her two grown-up kids who want to let loose with Mom's approval, yet Mom is still inwardly struggling with letting them totally fly the nest ... and rightly so!
You've created great imagery for your reader, and you have told this story with a great sense of humour. I loved it all, but my fave parts are:
- your daughter being tipsy and balancing on red wine, dressed in stilettos and a short dress. Hey, even I was impressed with that!!
- "I motioned with my eyes and a quick head nod (it's a family thing)" ... this just cracked me up!
- love how you told your husband "you won't believe what YOUR daughter did" ... haha ... if she's good she's yours, if she's bad, she's his. :)
Another terrific write, Mary! Keep 'em comin', girl!
Connie
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2016
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Hahaha ... you are such a MOTHER, Mary! And I mean that in the best sense possible. :)
I loved this delightful tale of a mother's angst while accompanying her two grown-up kids who want to let loose with Mom's approval, yet Mom is still inwardly struggling with letting them totally fly the nest ... and rightly so!
You've created great imagery for your reader, and you have told this story with a great sense of humour. I loved it all, but my fave parts are:
- your daughter being tipsy and balancing on red wine, dressed in stilettos and a short dress. Hey, even I was impressed with that!!
- "I motioned with my eyes and a quick head nod (it's a family thing)" ... this just cracked me up!
- love how you told your husband "you won't believe what YOUR daughter did" ... haha ... if she's good she's yours, if she's bad, she's his. :)
Another terrific write, Mary! Keep 'em comin', girl!
Connie
Comment Written 06-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 08-Nov-2016
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I can't help myself on the mom thing, no matter how old and independent they are!!! A struggle for sure! HAHA. I think I may have even channeled my departed uncle a few times on this trip! :)
Thank you so much for your RR&R and the fabulous SIX, Connie! I truly do appreciate your continued follow and interest in my work and was delighted you found this worthy of an elusive 'sixer'.
I hope to post the next chapter this week; all dependant on how well my two year old grandson, the mini- dictator cooperates! Have a great week! At one point, my computer kicked off and I lost everything on this chapter. I had to rebuild it and sadly, the first draft was better. Something about the computer being too far from the modem. I nearly cried, so your six was special for many reasons!
Your favorite parts were mine too!
Have a wonderful week, and thank you again, Connie. You are the best.
Comment from Mustang Patty
The story continues to keep me reading. I enjoy the main character's point of view. (I choose to believe I'm reading fiction, even though your author notes indicate this may be biographical.)
Your prose flow well, and I couldn't find any nits or spag. Great job. I will keep reading, as you post.
Thanks for sharing,
~patty~
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2016
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The story continues to keep me reading. I enjoy the main character's point of view. (I choose to believe I'm reading fiction, even though your author notes indicate this may be biographical.)
Your prose flow well, and I couldn't find any nits or spag. Great job. I will keep reading, as you post.
Thanks for sharing,
~patty~
Comment Written 06-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2016
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Hi Patty, thank you so much for your excellent review and comments. This is definitely biographical :) Thank you for your encouraging review!
Comment from Daniel Silverhawk
This was a fun read.Brunhilda definitely stole the show giving proper motherly advise rather than the expected witchery Brunhilda would normally offer. I could have sworn her name was Broomhilda. But that in no way took antlythingbaway from the story. Thanks for sharing your story
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2016
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This was a fun read.Brunhilda definitely stole the show giving proper motherly advise rather than the expected witchery Brunhilda would normally offer. I could have sworn her name was Broomhilda. But that in no way took antlythingbaway from the story. Thanks for sharing your story
Comment Written 06-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2016
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Thank you for RR&R, Daniel, I appreciate you taking the time to review and for your feedback. Brunhilda comes from a moniker we dubbed a friend's ex-wife eons ago, so when it came time to name my bitchy inner voice, she came to fruition...not to be confused with Django's wife :)
I enjoyed your review very much and appreciate your five stars! Have a great week!
Comment from F. Wehr3
Fun story! I enjoy your adventures and your inner voice. I found just one minor thing.
We had read about the mouth watering Nashville haunt before leaving Phoenix, and couldn't wait to try their renowned pancakes. --Suggest no comma before and.
Take care,
Russell
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2016
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Fun story! I enjoy your adventures and your inner voice. I found just one minor thing.
We had read about the mouth watering Nashville haunt before leaving Phoenix, and couldn't wait to try their renowned pancakes. --Suggest no comma before and.
Take care,
Russell
Comment Written 06-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 06-Nov-2016
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Hi Russell, thank you for your RR&R and appreciate your input on the comma. I have amended it likewise. I appreciate your continued interest. Have a great week!