To Last Forever
Viewing comments for Chapter 35 "Guilty as ..."Poems by Michael
14 total reviews
Comment from MissMerri
A sad poem, describing the death of a city that was once proud and strong... "victim of corporate sins." The video was one of the saddest depictions I've ever witnessed. How heartbreaking that must be, to see a place so neglected and unspeakably decrepit. I thought your poem was well-done and the rhymes were subtle and very creative. Good writing, and an excellent description of a sad, abandoned city.
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2016
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A sad poem, describing the death of a city that was once proud and strong... "victim of corporate sins." The video was one of the saddest depictions I've ever witnessed. How heartbreaking that must be, to see a place so neglected and unspeakably decrepit. I thought your poem was well-done and the rhymes were subtle and very creative. Good writing, and an excellent description of a sad, abandoned city.
Comment Written 05-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2016
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Hi Meadow...-smile-
yes Maam, sad in the extreme. when I was a kid it started...um everyone that could moved from the city to the surrounding suburbs...working in city during the day. When the "powers that be" decided greed was "good" and pulled up their tents and moved to foreign lands...the city first and then surrounding suburbs slowly starved to death. Some of my family still lives their...in the suburbs. These human beings who are responsible for taking the substance of life away from their countrymen or murders and traitors...plain and simple. Thank you for stopping by...its good to see you. love to you ...Michael
Comment from Gloria ....
You know Michael this is bloody amazing. Such a fresh poem with incredibly vivid images of abandoned cars once home were once shiny things.
Your meter is fine and most importantly I am totally fucking impressed. This is a really fine octogram.
Sweeeeeeeet. :))
Gloria
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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You know Michael this is bloody amazing. Such a fresh poem with incredibly vivid images of abandoned cars once home were once shiny things.
Your meter is fine and most importantly I am totally fucking impressed. This is a really fine octogram.
Sweeeeeeeet. :))
Gloria
Comment Written 04-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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hm...well...yea, of course you you are...?
well maybe I'll promote it then...let everybody see...wha...what you said. -bigsmile-...thank you G...I feel much taller now. love to you ...Michael
Comment from MizKat
Hi Michael,
You sure know how to write all kinds of poems, although sometimes there are words I don't know. I'm falling apart having headaches every day with my whole body filled with aches and pains. It's what happens to some when they get as old as me. LOL Although I had an aunt who lived into her late nineties and was smart as a whip. LOL
Kat
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reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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Hi Michael,
You sure know how to write all kinds of poems, although sometimes there are words I don't know. I'm falling apart having headaches every day with my whole body filled with aches and pains. It's what happens to some when they get as old as me. LOL Although I had an aunt who lived into her late nineties and was smart as a whip. LOL
Kat
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Comment Written 04-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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Hi Mom...-smile-....well I am a poet Mom...I didn't wallow away my life inside my head for the nothing ya know....-headtilt-.....-smile- thank you Dear....I know the feeling of aches and pains its a big part of my life Mom...love to you...Michael
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Oh no, why didn't you tell long ago that you are having a lot of aches and pains too. It's no fun at all is it? MomKat
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I've been writing about them since my arrival Mom...nobody ever listens to me.....-smile-...I'm fine...night night-
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Well, like I told you, I'm OLD and Forgetful. LOL Have a good sleep son and I'll see you tomorrow. Mom
Comment from michaelcahill
Wow, Michael. This is stunning in form, rhyme, and the content is just brilliant and thought provoking. It really says a lot about this country to look at the rise and fall of Detroit. It's a little snapshot really with no photo shopping applied. Your entire presentation equals any long drawn out article on the subject. It ways it all and in a way that sticks.
crazy as that sounds common --on extra syllable here for perfection. "sounding" maybe?
An awesome piece, Michael. You do structure with reckless abandon. :)) mikey
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reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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Wow, Michael. This is stunning in form, rhyme, and the content is just brilliant and thought provoking. It really says a lot about this country to look at the rise and fall of Detroit. It's a little snapshot really with no photo shopping applied. Your entire presentation equals any long drawn out article on the subject. It ways it all and in a way that sticks.
crazy as that sounds common --on extra syllable here for perfection. "sounding" maybe?
An awesome piece, Michael. You do structure with reckless abandon. :)) mikey
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 04-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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-smile-...thank you Bro.
I wasn't going to...but I said I would. I don't want to do any more meter ones though...I have no idea if this one has any or not. and it sounds fine to me either way. ahahaha...appreciate you...i'll fix it so at least I'm half ass...-smile-...love to you...Michael
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No, this is top notch, Michael. You make the form work for you perfectly. Nothing half ass about it. It's full ass my friend. HAHAHA! We're twins, Bro. :)) mikey
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hahaha....alright at least I'm not alone anymore. so how you been...?
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I'm good. Ignoring the goings on here. LOL
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hm...I hope you have better luck then luckless...peace Bro-
