Comment from mountainwriter49

Excellent

Good Afternoon, Steve,

You did a fine job with his Rondeau Redouble. This is a complex form and you've executed it well. The meter is spot-on as are the end-rhymes. Some of the end rhymes are interesting and add flavor to the read. Importantly, the repeated lines do not sound forced or repeated.

The subject matter is amazing, as I'd never thought to write about death in this poetic form. But it works. My overall take on your theme is carpe diem.

-Ray

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 11-Jan-2016

Thanks, Ray, for the thoughtful and intelligent comment.

Steve

Comment from doggymad

Excellent

This poem danced along nicely, lightening the otherwise sombre content.

It was amusing and contained a lot of truth. Some of these methods are a bit far fetched for Ireland, but who know where we will end up, if only on holidays.

hugs

Freda

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 11-Jan-2016

Thanks, Freda.

Perhaps we are both fortunate in New Zealand and Ireland that some of the more violent ways to die are low down on the list of probabilities...

Steve

Comment from strandregs

Excellent

Interesting format that either shoots you in the eye yai yai
or brings you glorious ovation.
now I'll read again and decide.
that's the problem with a short memory:-))
Yeeah I suppose you did good for such a difficult
endeavour :-))
God I sound a right grump today:-))
Well done :-)) Z.

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 11-Jan-2016

Thank you - join the grumpy club! I'm a little that way inclined myself at the moment.

Steve

Comment from Sandra du Plessis

Excellent

An interesting form of the Rondeau, I thought I learned it all. Lol. We never know how or when our lives on earth may end, it is better to live from day to day and be the best person you can

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 11-Jan-2016

Thanks, Sandra.

I see you working your way through the various forms - this is a tough one!

Steve

Comment from Ekim777

Exceptional

Well I romped through this one with elation. I'm sure I gained as much pleasure reading it as the poet gained in writing it. I mean, don't we take ourselves too seriously? I'm sure I found some wisdom in between the lines. It almost me got me thinking. Some say that from the day we are born, we begin dying. -Ekim777

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 11-Jan-2016

Thanks, Mike.

Cardinal sin, taking our insignificant little selves too seriously. I know this, and yet I still need a kick occasionally to remind me!

Steve

Comment from Cumbrianlass

Excellent

Impressive, as always, Steve. And clever, too, having read your author notes. I love the image of the 'caverned eye'. Brilliant visual. Not up on the mechanics of poetry, really - I either like or don't like. The subject matter here is morbid, but as you mention, the ironic humour lifts it from a bleak observation of reality to smile-worthy entertainment.

:)

Av

 Comment Written 11-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 11-Jan-2016

Thanks, Av.

Yes, lots of mechanics in this one, but it's fun when it falls together, like finishing a puzzle.

Steve

Comment from Gloria ....

Excellent

Well congratulations Steve on your poem being published. I'm not really surprised as almost all your poetry is publish worthy in my humble opinion, except that one haiku about the jade. That one went waaaaaaay over my head. LOL.

This rondeau redouble on the other hand is undeniably, logically presented. The kind of thing I can get my head around without going through gymnast contortions.

I can see the irony here, you're going to die anyway so you might as well go hard.

This is written to perfection and I enjoyed every word of it.

Gloria

 Comment Written 10-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 11-Jan-2016

Gloria, thanks for the great review and the kind words. Somewhere that will pay me for my work is nice.

Steve

Comment from w.j.debi

Exceptional

You have a point, there are so many ways to go and we do all have to go one way or another. I've only written one Rondeau Redouble and it is a challenging form. Yours flows so well that you make it appear like it was easy to put together. You nailed it.

 Comment Written 10-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 11-Jan-2016

Thanks for the great review and the six stars.

Steve

Comment from angel123

Excellent

I enjoyed reading your interesting poem and your author notes. The poem type sounds complicated to write. It reads somewhat as a sonnet. Anyway, I like it very much. It also flows and rhymes well.

Angel123

 Comment Written 10-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 11-Jan-2016

Thank you. Yep, it's a tricky form.

Steve

Comment from Douglas Paul

Excellent

I am not familiar with this type of verse. It seems pretty complicated and challenging. Looks like you did it pretty well to me. Good job. I think you started out with a really good first verse and that flavor carried well through out the rest of the poem. Thank for the authors nots that explained it all

 Comment Written 10-Jan-2016

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reply by the author on 11-Jan-2016

Thanks, Douglas. Yes, it is a bit complicated - very satisfying when you succeed, though.

Steve