Ate One Nut Too Many
....sorry to hear about Sammy Joe42 total reviews
Comment from Amy Greta
This is a clever light-hearted tombstone contest entry. I like the simplicity, the rhyme, and the story (even though it has a sad ending for Sammy Joe).
This sounds like something a parent could say to their child who's allergic to peanuts to ensure they stay away from them...you don't want to end up like Sammy Joe!
Well done,
Amy
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
This is a clever light-hearted tombstone contest entry. I like the simplicity, the rhyme, and the story (even though it has a sad ending for Sammy Joe).
This sounds like something a parent could say to their child who's allergic to peanuts to ensure they stay away from them...you don't want to end up like Sammy Joe!
Well done,
Amy
Comment Written 13-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
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Amy,
Thanks so much for your review and very kind comments. Blessings.....................Portia
Comment from c_lucas
Reminds me of a song in my youth..."Ate A Peanut." I enjoy reading this version. It is very well written with a humorous flow of word. Good luck in your contest.
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
Reminds me of a song in my youth..."Ate A Peanut." I enjoy reading this version. It is very well written with a humorous flow of word. Good luck in your contest.
Comment Written 13-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
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Thanks so much for your review, kind comments and best wishes, they are greatly appreciated. Blessings.....Portia
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You're welcome, Portia. Charlie
Comment from Bill O'Bier
The language you chose creates clear moving images. The art work complemented well the message of the poem. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
The language you chose creates clear moving images. The art work complemented well the message of the poem. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 12-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
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Thanks so much for your very kind review. Blessings..........................Portia
Comment from Jeffers63
Thanks for this fun Tombstone poem. I see why the squirrels come its their want to take every opportunity to feed. Thanks again.
Regards
Jeffers63
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
Thanks for this fun Tombstone poem. I see why the squirrels come its their want to take every opportunity to feed. Thanks again.
Regards
Jeffers63
Comment Written 12-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
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Thanks so much for your very kind review. Blessings..............................Portia
Comment from Debbie Noland
I love the humor in this scenario you create. I for one will heed this lesson to eat peanuts slowly if at all.
It is an interesting touch that, once the words tell us Sammy Joe is "out of control," you vary your meter just a bit and thus reinforce that loss of control with your rhythm. What fun!
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
I love the humor in this scenario you create. I for one will heed this lesson to eat peanuts slowly if at all.
It is an interesting touch that, once the words tell us Sammy Joe is "out of control," you vary your meter just a bit and thus reinforce that loss of control with your rhythm. What fun!
Comment Written 12-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
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Debbie,
Thanks so much for your review and very kind comments, they are greatly appreciated. Blessings......................Portia
Comment from mermaids
Love your last line 'squirrels ate the rest by his side". It adds humour to your poem. Excellent use of rhyming words and you have a smooth flow of lines. I wish you well in the contest, this is a great entry.
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
Love your last line 'squirrels ate the rest by his side". It adds humour to your poem. Excellent use of rhyming words and you have a smooth flow of lines. I wish you well in the contest, this is a great entry.
Comment Written 12-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
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Thanks so much for your very kind review. Blessings.......................................Portia
Comment from Liberty Justice
Poem is so cute and amusing. Excellent poem for contest. Verses are so musical and funny. Written as contest entry in tombstone poem. Good LUCK. liberty justice
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
Poem is so cute and amusing. Excellent poem for contest. Verses are so musical and funny. Written as contest entry in tombstone poem. Good LUCK. liberty justice
Comment Written 12-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
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Thanks so much for your review very kind comments and best wishes, they are greatly appreciated. Blessings.......Portia
Comment from MacMhuirich
This epitaph is a lot of fun. Good rhyme and form and such an easy read. The moral of the story is:- Don't eat peanuts in the presence of squirrels - your time might be up. Best wishes for the contest.
Bless you
John
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
This epitaph is a lot of fun. Good rhyme and form and such an easy read. The moral of the story is:- Don't eat peanuts in the presence of squirrels - your time might be up. Best wishes for the contest.
Bless you
John
Comment Written 12-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
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Thanks so much for your review, very kind comments and best wishes. Blessings........................Portia
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
This is really a very good Tombstone Poetry contest entry. It reads very rhythmically in 9/8/8/8. Good picture. A worthy entry and I wish you good luck. Warm regards Dorothy x
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
This is really a very good Tombstone Poetry contest entry. It reads very rhythmically in 9/8/8/8. Good picture. A worthy entry and I wish you good luck. Warm regards Dorothy x
Comment Written 12-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
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Dorothy,
Thanks so much for your review, very kind comments and best wishes. Blessings................Portia
Comment from scd41
The epitaph is so funny. Someone's loss is always a gain for another. The loss of Sammy Joe was windfall for the squirrels. If only squirrels could read the epitaph, they would jump around for having got peanuts on their platter.
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
The epitaph is so funny. Someone's loss is always a gain for another. The loss of Sammy Joe was windfall for the squirrels. If only squirrels could read the epitaph, they would jump around for having got peanuts on their platter.
Comment Written 12-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2016
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Thanks so much for your review and very kind comments. Blessings...............................Portia