The Quest
Viewing comments for Chapter 7 "The Quest Part Seven"Finding My Roots
31 total reviews
Comment from ginnorm
Very impressive description of the anxiety felt at the thought of finally seeing the mother you had bee looking for. The ending is suspenseful. Over all capturing my interest even though I'm not sure of the previous parts of the story your recap helped me figure it out.
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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Very impressive description of the anxiety felt at the thought of finally seeing the mother you had bee looking for. The ending is suspenseful. Over all capturing my interest even though I'm not sure of the previous parts of the story your recap helped me figure it out.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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Thanks for the review. Ulla
Comment from light
Great description of the drive along the California beach. I could feel your aprehension about seeing your mother for the first time.
Well done
Elaine
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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Great description of the drive along the California beach. I could feel your aprehension about seeing your mother for the first time.
Well done
Elaine
Comment Written 18-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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Thank you so much, Elaine. I'm glad you liked it. All best, Ulla
Comment from justafan
Oh gosh, ya got my heart in my throat now, Ulla. I know this has to be the hardest thing in the world. So many doubts, but on the other hand, so many answered questions. Right?
This is a brilliant job your doing here with this quest. :)
Always,
Missy
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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Oh gosh, ya got my heart in my throat now, Ulla. I know this has to be the hardest thing in the world. So many doubts, but on the other hand, so many answered questions. Right?
This is a brilliant job your doing here with this quest. :)
Always,
Missy
Comment Written 18-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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Ah, Missy, thank you so much. Yes, you are right all kind of things went through my head and I was really caught out by all the emotion I felt. I'm so pleased that you like it. All the best, Ulla
Comment from Tessa Kay
You really are keeping us hanging. I thought this time we'll finally get to see you meeting your mom. Have to wait until next time then.
A couple notes:
-We had survived. - just simple past tense here: We survived.
-We were feeling too emotional to say much, - we felt too...
-to a light meal, looking over the ocean, - looked over the ocean...
-While I gazed over the ocean, I admired the beautiful view, while I thought about what was to happen later in the day. - 2 x 'while I' in the same sentence. Rephrase? E.g. O gazed over the ocean and admired the beautiful view while I thought...
- I strolled in asking - means you're asking while you're strolling in. The -ing form makes it simultaneous. So, should be: I strolled in and asked...
-ing forms should only be used very very rarely.
-I couldn't remember that I've cried like that - ..that I had (I'd) cried...
-I drove passed her house - past her house
Good cliffhanger again. Looking forward to the next instalment:)
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reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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You really are keeping us hanging. I thought this time we'll finally get to see you meeting your mom. Have to wait until next time then.
A couple notes:
-We had survived. - just simple past tense here: We survived.
-We were feeling too emotional to say much, - we felt too...
-to a light meal, looking over the ocean, - looked over the ocean...
-While I gazed over the ocean, I admired the beautiful view, while I thought about what was to happen later in the day. - 2 x 'while I' in the same sentence. Rephrase? E.g. O gazed over the ocean and admired the beautiful view while I thought...
- I strolled in asking - means you're asking while you're strolling in. The -ing form makes it simultaneous. So, should be: I strolled in and asked...
-ing forms should only be used very very rarely.
-I couldn't remember that I've cried like that - ..that I had (I'd) cried...
-I drove passed her house - past her house
Good cliffhanger again. Looking forward to the next instalment:)
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Comment Written 18-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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Tessa thank you so much and for pointing out my mistakes which I have all corrected. I'm so pleased by that because I learn all the time. It was an emotional time and I am very glad that you like it. All the best. Ulla
Comment from alexisleech
Oh, Ulla - that is so cruel! I was reading faster and faster, trying to get to the end so I could find out what happened and then find I'm going to have to hold me breath until the next chapter!
This was word perfect, and so enjoyable to read. I'm so glad it's Sunday and I can give it the rating it so deserves!
Alexis xxx
asking whether they got (had?)a local map.
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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Oh, Ulla - that is so cruel! I was reading faster and faster, trying to get to the end so I could find out what happened and then find I'm going to have to hold me breath until the next chapter!
This was word perfect, and so enjoyable to read. I'm so glad it's Sunday and I can give it the rating it so deserves!
Alexis xxx
asking whether they got (had?)a local map.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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Oh Alexis, Thank you ever so much and for all your lovely stars. You know how much it means to me. Sorry to keep you hanging. Didn't mean to be cruel. he,he. It was very emotional and you'll soon know what's next. Ulla xxx
Comment from Green Lake Girl
Wow! We're getting so close. Great cliff-hanger, Ulla.
You do a really good job of portraying your emotional state at the time of this event. I can well imagine how daunting it'd be so see your mother for the first time as an adult.
I'm familiar with the California scene you describe. The condors are amazing, aren't they? I hope the beauty of nature foreshadows your first encounter with your mother.
I'm on pins and needles waiting for the big reveal. Good job, Ulla.
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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Wow! We're getting so close. Great cliff-hanger, Ulla.
You do a really good job of portraying your emotional state at the time of this event. I can well imagine how daunting it'd be so see your mother for the first time as an adult.
I'm familiar with the California scene you describe. The condors are amazing, aren't they? I hope the beauty of nature foreshadows your first encounter with your mother.
I'm on pins and needles waiting for the big reveal. Good job, Ulla.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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Oh thank you so much for your very nice review. I am so glad that you like it. It was an emotional time that even took me by surprise. Thanks a lot again. Ulla
Comment from JTStone
I've followed you most the way there. Now I definitely have to come back to see what happens. My girlfriend let a child up for adoption during her troubled youth. She finally hooked up with her on facebook--so this story has a little more interest to me than most.
JT
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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I've followed you most the way there. Now I definitely have to come back to see what happens. My girlfriend let a child up for adoption during her troubled youth. She finally hooked up with her on facebook--so this story has a little more interest to me than most.
JT
Comment Written 18-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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Thank you so much for your review and the interest you are taking. I'm glad you've decided to follow on. I can understand the personal interest you have in this. All best, Ulla
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Well written story draws readers into the scene where they can much better experience all the events unfolding around them.
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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Well written story draws readers into the scene where they can much better experience all the events unfolding around them.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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Thank you so much for an excellent review. All best. Ulla
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
I can imagine your excitement -
and I can't wait to find out
what happens - whether your mother
was there and what her reactions will
be.
A few minor things:
Not only for it's beauty - its
as it cast it's last - its
God! it was only - Cap T for It
After passing her house yet again, I noticed that a car was parked in the driveway outside the garage, which either meant she had visitors or that she had parked her car outside. Well, there was only one way to find out, and I certainly was going to. - HERE, Ulla, you are "stating the obvious" at the end of the sentence - her car would be outside. perhaps - or it was her car parked there. (Just a suggestion - to use or not - hope you don't mind me mentioning, my friend)
Margaret
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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I can imagine your excitement -
and I can't wait to find out
what happens - whether your mother
was there and what her reactions will
be.
A few minor things:
Not only for it's beauty - its
as it cast it's last - its
God! it was only - Cap T for It
After passing her house yet again, I noticed that a car was parked in the driveway outside the garage, which either meant she had visitors or that she had parked her car outside. Well, there was only one way to find out, and I certainly was going to. - HERE, Ulla, you are "stating the obvious" at the end of the sentence - her car would be outside. perhaps - or it was her car parked there. (Just a suggestion - to use or not - hope you don't mind me mentioning, my friend)
Margaret
Comment Written 18-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 19-Oct-2015
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Margaret, Thank you so much for your review. I'm so pleased that you like it. Also thanks for catching my silly mistakes. I know it so well, yet never caught it in revising which I do again and again. I'm always open to suggestions, which I really do appreciate. All the best, Ulla
Comment from chasennov
Finding My Roots "The Quest Part Seven" This is a very good biographical story you have created here. I always enjoy real stories about real people. Very well done.
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2015
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Finding My Roots "The Quest Part Seven" This is a very good biographical story you have created here. I always enjoy real stories about real people. Very well done.
Comment Written 18-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 18-Oct-2015
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Thank you so much for your great review. All best, Ulla