Act of Endurance
Viewing comments for Chapter 31 "A Song"Dawn of Chaos
28 total reviews
Comment from DonandVicki
This is labeled as a song and I did my darnedest to try to come up with a tune in my head. I guess you were trying to resemble David in the Psalms? Nevertheless a nicely constructed poem.
reply by the author on 29-Feb-2016
  |
This is labeled as a song and I did my darnedest to try to come up with a tune in my head. I guess you were trying to resemble David in the Psalms? Nevertheless a nicely constructed poem.
Comment Written 25-Feb-2016
reply by the author on 29-Feb-2016
-
I didn't know David wrote of birds, with all that chaos surrounding him. Thanking you for generous rate and touching thoughts about this write.
Comment from prettybluebirds
Excellent. I like this one the best of all your work that I have read today. My best friends are animals too. One dog and seven cats. All are rescue animals and they repay with love for rescuing them/
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2016
|
Excellent. I like this one the best of all your work that I have read today. My best friends are animals too. One dog and seven cats. All are rescue animals and they repay with love for rescuing them/
Comment Written 25-Feb-2016
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2016
-
I was raised on a small farm with plenty imagination: hope my journey was pleasing to you. Thanking you for generous rate and encouraging statements.
Comment from Michael Wahl
I am having mixed feelings about your poem, but the bottom line is quite favorable. I kept thinking that it was too long to achieve maximum effectiveness, but each new line or series of lines advanced your concepts, so it does seem incorrect to stop until the real end gets here.
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2015
|
I am having mixed feelings about your poem, but the bottom line is quite favorable. I kept thinking that it was too long to achieve maximum effectiveness, but each new line or series of lines advanced your concepts, so it does seem incorrect to stop until the real end gets here.
Comment Written 11-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2015
Yet, I might assume somewhat dry in its presentation lacking refreshing features for reader -somewhat delightful in interest. Thanks for over generous rate and well recieved comments
Comment from lalajovanoski
Completely excellent free verse contest entry submission poem. Very deep as well as emotional. Thank you so very much for sharing this i truly enjoyed reading. Best wishes in the contest!
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2015
|
Completely excellent free verse contest entry submission poem. Very deep as well as emotional. Thank you so very much for sharing this i truly enjoyed reading. Best wishes in the contest!
Comment Written 11-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jun-2015
Glad this work touched within you, which is illustrated and enhanced by your response I appreciate wondrous comment and encouragements applied Thank you
Comment from Rhona18
Punctuation would have helped me get to grips with this poem. It was hard work. I am finding it very difficult to work out the Fanstory marking system - so if I have inadvertently done something wrong I apologise.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 17-May-2015
 |
Punctuation would have helped me get to grips with this poem. It was hard work. I am finding it very difficult to work out the Fanstory marking system - so if I have inadvertently done something wrong I apologise.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-May-2015
reply by the author on 17-May-2015
Thanks for the honesty and the place I feel comfortable at needing improvement and punctuation would enhance statement clarity
Comment from royowen
The is a like to stream of consciousness taking me on a fantastic journey, there's so many varied thoughts all at once, but it's a fantastic voyage, very clever and as I'm reading it in the early morning, a lot to absorb. Great language, the descriptive imagery is a wonderfully varied, like a clash of drums, I enjoyed the journey, well done, good luck in the contest, blessings, Roy.
reply by the author on 17-May-2015
|
The is a like to stream of consciousness taking me on a fantastic journey, there's so many varied thoughts all at once, but it's a fantastic voyage, very clever and as I'm reading it in the early morning, a lot to absorb. Great language, the descriptive imagery is a wonderfully varied, like a clash of drums, I enjoyed the journey, well done, good luck in the contest, blessings, Roy.
Comment Written 16-May-2015
reply by the author on 17-May-2015
Wonderful insights and conveyances in your generous and kind response am getting cross mix but thank all for whatever aspect they behold its why I am here to listen
-
Most welcome
Comment from sibhus
Wow, what a mixed bag of expressions, but I liked it. I liked how you have swung from the light to the dark in such unique terms, praising the joys of life while shutting away the sorrows. A very interesting poem that was a joy to read.
reply by the author on 17-May-2015
|
Wow, what a mixed bag of expressions, but I liked it. I liked how you have swung from the light to the dark in such unique terms, praising the joys of life while shutting away the sorrows. A very interesting poem that was a joy to read.
Comment Written 16-May-2015
reply by the author on 17-May-2015
Thanking your for your very generous rate and thoughtful remarks
Comment from Donovan
This is a wonderful offering that you have presented. I like the content and the message. It allows the reader to feel what you feel. I would suggest the formatting of no breaks makes it very difficult physically to read.
reply by the author on 17-May-2015
|
This is a wonderful offering that you have presented. I like the content and the message. It allows the reader to feel what you feel. I would suggest the formatting of no breaks makes it very difficult physically to read.
Comment Written 16-May-2015
reply by the author on 17-May-2015
I know but one step at time first the thought followed by enhancement glad you were able to swallow these chunks Thanks for generous rate and helpful comment
Comment from Bill Schott
This poem is dense with meaning and juxtapositioned wording that seems to contradict the emotion it evokes.
'Pour hot rich molting lava flowing gold
hope in glass a shattered vessel broken'
A theme of endurance sided with some angelic aid seems prevalent. Great stuff.
reply by the author on 16-May-2015
|
This poem is dense with meaning and juxtapositioned wording that seems to contradict the emotion it evokes.
'Pour hot rich molting lava flowing gold
hope in glass a shattered vessel broken'
A theme of endurance sided with some angelic aid seems prevalent. Great stuff.
Comment Written 16-May-2015
reply by the author on 16-May-2015
Thanks for this surprising aspects in your comments in the review. Glad you for some form of delight within the work expression. I did and beginning to see more through others eyes
Comment from Chris Tee
I like this excellent poem a song and the words are mostly moral appeals this is a great entry and I wish you luck in this free verse contest.
reply by the author on 14-May-2015
|
I like this excellent poem a song and the words are mostly moral appeals this is a great entry and I wish you luck in this free verse contest.
Comment Written 14-May-2015
reply by the author on 14-May-2015
Thanking you for response and with things stated an exhale on Song. Very generous rate and assurance of accomplishment