Comment from tfawcus

Excellent

This is a perfect description of the almost imperceptible motion of a spring tide on a calm sea. '...: Collapsing froth meanders over sand / Their undulations dying with each plash, / As each impinges less upon the land' captures it exactly.

 Comment Written 16-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 16-Apr-2015

You are most kind. Many thanks for your review.

Comment from kiwijenny

Excellent

I love this poem and the observations of tides and waves...and low spring tides..I love the ebb and flo of the tides
Well penned poem...I love the imagery
God bless

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 16-Apr-2015

Thank you Jenny. You have confirmed my belief that the tides work on the upside-down part of the world in the same way as they do here!

Comment from BeasPeas

Excellent

Hi gynt. I see you just joined the FanStory site--welcome. This poem is wonderful. I enjoyed every word and line, so descriptive. It brings back memories of the Atlantic in early morning. The scene of tide receding is vivid. I felt as if I was there myself. Marilyn/BeasPeas

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 16-Apr-2015

Thank you so much for this review. It's good to know that tides seem to work the same wherever you are in the world!

Comment from emrpoems

Excellent

Well done with ababcdcdefefgg rhymes
Good use of descriptive lines that create vivid imagery
Nice bit of alliteration
Good pairing of picture and poem

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 16-Apr-2015

Thank you so much for your kind review.

Comment from royowen

Excellent

Beautifully written, the sonnet flows sweetly off the pen, the excellent phrasing gives it an elegant feel to it, you appear to have researched your material well, the language used is persuasive and descriptively expressive in it's projection, the meter is even giving it continuity, and the ababcdcdefefgg rhyming is good, well done, good work, blessings Roy.

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 16-Apr-2015

Thanks Roy for this observant review.

reply by royowen on 16-Apr-2015

Most welcome

Comment from Bill Schott

Excellent

This has got to be the best description of the tide going out I've read. Rich language chosen well and splendid images of the low tide phenomenon. Really good read.

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 16-Apr-2015

Thank you Bill for your really complimantary review.

Comment from Michael Ludwinder

Excellent

I thought you did a wonderful job of describing the landscape. I could see the water and hear the splashes. Terrific word choices and a very enjoyable read.

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 15-Apr-2015

Thank you very much for your kind review.

Comment from benoenose

Exceptional

Shaky poem that says the little fountain from the earth can destroy the universe. The poem so touching when attributed to tidal waves that wash away human settlements, and that made me think of the tsunami that struck our people. So cruel is natures destruction, a simple water spring can make.
What an allegorical treatment in the poem visualizing the tragic note. Rhythmic beauty within the poem appreciates the simple tide. Recommended for nature lovers and beach lovers.

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 15-Apr-2015

Thank you for your review. Later in this collecton I have a couple of poems that touch on tsunamis.

Comment from TAB_that's me

Excellent

great abab rhyme. great alliteration with foaming/gractured and declares/defeat. It is a beautiful and peaceful poem.

teresa

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 15-Apr-2015

Thanks Teresa for your kind review. I'm glad the peacefulness came over as I had intended.

Comment from Brett Matthew West

Good

Poem flowed well between verses but a picture would really set this poem off. You may want to consider using one. Descriptive language also helped make message easy to understand. Write on.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 15-Apr-2015

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reply by the author on 15-Apr-2015

I was hoping not to post artwork with this series. I can see what you are getting at but I had hoped that the words would create pictures in the mind like the little girl who said she prefered radio to TV because the pict0u0res were better! I'll see what people think as I go along and maybe add something later. Thanks for reading and reviewing.