Apollo's First Love
Rondeau Redouble28 total reviews
Comment from Christine B.
Worthy of enjoyment, w.j.debi, very much so. I reckon there might be many descendents of Apollo's, working their obsessions and laughing on the sidelines. Ha-ha! Would explain plenty of feminine woes.
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2014
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Worthy of enjoyment, w.j.debi, very much so. I reckon there might be many descendents of Apollo's, working their obsessions and laughing on the sidelines. Ha-ha! Would explain plenty of feminine woes.
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2014
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Thank you for the excellent review, Christine. I love your insights on Apollo's descendants. I appreciate the kind comments and encouragement. Debi
Comment from jlsavell
w.j.debi,
I am so glad I became a fan of yours. Stunning imagery employed in this work, excellent abab rhyme scheme, the work comes alive as it rolls from the tongue.
Wonderful... jls
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2014
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w.j.debi,
I am so glad I became a fan of yours. Stunning imagery employed in this work, excellent abab rhyme scheme, the work comes alive as it rolls from the tongue.
Wonderful... jls
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 04-Oct-2014
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This is such and encouraging review, jls. I am happy you enjoyed reading it and thrilled you dropped by to review. Thank you so much. Debi
Comment from nancy_e_davis
My WJ, You put a lot of effort in this poem. The Presentation and picture choice is very pleasing. The story in both the
poem and the notes were well done. Good entry for the contest. Good luck. Nancy
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2014
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My WJ, You put a lot of effort in this poem. The Presentation and picture choice is very pleasing. The story in both the
poem and the notes were well done. Good entry for the contest. Good luck. Nancy
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 05-Oct-2014
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Thank you for the great review, Nancy. I appreciate the encouraging remarks. Debi
Comment from pipersfancy
No need to pit your work against others in a contest that only serves to stress! Besides, this is a lovely winner of a poem! I quite like what you've done - and, being a fan of mythology myself, your chosen topic really heightened my appreciation and enjoyment of the work! Nicely rhymed.
Cheers,
PF
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2014
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No need to pit your work against others in a contest that only serves to stress! Besides, this is a lovely winner of a poem! I quite like what you've done - and, being a fan of mythology myself, your chosen topic really heightened my appreciation and enjoyment of the work! Nicely rhymed.
Cheers,
PF
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2014
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Thank you for the encouraging comments about the writing, PF. I am happy to hear you enjoyed it. This is one of my favorite myths so it was fun to play with the story in a different format. Debi
Comment from krys123
W.j.debi,
A very impressive piece of poetry that is written in a Rondeau style and written very well at that.
I was completely impressed with its rhythm of great tempo and meter and a running which was neither forced nor labored and helped with the rhythmic flow which flowed smoothly throughout the writing.
The imagery was demonstratively descriptive and also very excitingly expressive throughout the writing: "
Twigs sprout from fingers, leaves, then grow and Laurel bark engulfs her frame. Apollo shouts a plaintive, "No!"
The Golden dart and Love's acclaim." These are very expressive lines that shows Apollo's love for Daphne.
Thank you for sharing and posting this for everyone to read and may the good Lord be with you always, my friend.
Alex
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2014
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W.j.debi,
A very impressive piece of poetry that is written in a Rondeau style and written very well at that.
I was completely impressed with its rhythm of great tempo and meter and a running which was neither forced nor labored and helped with the rhythmic flow which flowed smoothly throughout the writing.
The imagery was demonstratively descriptive and also very excitingly expressive throughout the writing: "
Twigs sprout from fingers, leaves, then grow and Laurel bark engulfs her frame. Apollo shouts a plaintive, "No!"
The Golden dart and Love's acclaim." These are very expressive lines that shows Apollo's love for Daphne.
Thank you for sharing and posting this for everyone to read and may the good Lord be with you always, my friend.
Alex
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 03-Oct-2014
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Thank you for the detailed review, Alex. I especially appreciate you pointing out what you liked and what worked. Thank you for the encouragement. You brightened my day. Debi
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You are so sincerely welcome my dearest friend.
Alex
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You're so sincerely welcome Debi.
Alex
Comment from Louise Michelle
Hi Debi,
I'm smiling at your notes about contests stressing you out. People forget that the true joy is in the writing.
I'm also grateful for your recap about this mythological story. Refreshing my memory allowed me to enjoy reading this so much more. Very nicely written.
Hugs,
Lou
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2014
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Hi Debi,
I'm smiling at your notes about contests stressing you out. People forget that the true joy is in the writing.
I'm also grateful for your recap about this mythological story. Refreshing my memory allowed me to enjoy reading this so much more. Very nicely written.
Hugs,
Lou
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2014
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Thank your for the gracious comments, Lou. This is one of my favorited myths so it was fun to try telling it in a new form. I am happy you enjoyed it.
Yes, the joy is the writing process itself. I appreciate your encouraging remarks. Debi
Comment from Emily George
Wonderful rhyme pattern that in your notes sound so complicated. I have to say I found it very beautiful and Olde worlde just the thing with a glass of wine.
Laurel leaves for devotion
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2014
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Wonderful rhyme pattern that in your notes sound so complicated. I have to say I found it very beautiful and Olde worlde just the thing with a glass of wine.
Laurel leaves for devotion
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2014
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What a wonderful review. Please do enjoy it with your wine. Thank you for the very generous six stars, Emily George. You have me smiling. Thank you.
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Oh I love this poem. A wonderful story expertly written in poetry form. An excellent Rondeau Redouble and I find nothing that I could improve upon. The display is gorgeous and rules for this form carried out perfectly with good rhyme and lovely well chosen words. I have never tried one and I admire your effort. Warm regards Dorothy x
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2014
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Oh I love this poem. A wonderful story expertly written in poetry form. An excellent Rondeau Redouble and I find nothing that I could improve upon. The display is gorgeous and rules for this form carried out perfectly with good rhyme and lovely well chosen words. I have never tried one and I admire your effort. Warm regards Dorothy x
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2014
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I cannot tell you how flatterd I am by your comments. That you love this poem is so nice to hear, and enough to give it six stars, too! Dororthy, you have really brightened my day. Thank you so much. Debi
Comment from tdragonfly
I enjoyed reading the poem. I also enjoyed the authors notes as well. I find Greek mythology interesting. I never new about the story behind the Laurel crown. Very good job with the Rondeau Redouble.
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2014
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I enjoyed reading the poem. I also enjoyed the authors notes as well. I find Greek mythology interesting. I never new about the story behind the Laurel crown. Very good job with the Rondeau Redouble.
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2014
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I am pleased that you enjoyed reading the poem and the author notes. The story of Daphne and Apollo is one of my favorites. Who knew those laurel crowns meant so much? Thank your for the kind comments about the writing. I appreciate the encouragement.
Comment from kiwisteveh
Very nice entry for the contest - you have done a good job of re-telling the Apollo/Daphne myth in poetic form, retaining all the key details and weaving them into the rather tricky rondeau redouble.
I was fooled at first into thinking that some of your repeated lines didn't fit in, but on a second reading sa some clever enjambment across the stanzas so that everything works - well done.
The only slight weakness may be the series of rhymes acclaim/proclaim/claim - I would prefer rhymes where the stem word is different...
Good luck in the contest.
Steve
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2014
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Very nice entry for the contest - you have done a good job of re-telling the Apollo/Daphne myth in poetic form, retaining all the key details and weaving them into the rather tricky rondeau redouble.
I was fooled at first into thinking that some of your repeated lines didn't fit in, but on a second reading sa some clever enjambment across the stanzas so that everything works - well done.
The only slight weakness may be the series of rhymes acclaim/proclaim/claim - I would prefer rhymes where the stem word is different...
Good luck in the contest.
Steve
Comment Written 29-Sep-2014
reply by the author on 02-Oct-2014
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Great observation, Steve. That is one thing I struggled with. Who knew there were so many words that end in "claim". I tried some other rhymes, but would have had to make the story longer to get them to work. Maybe not the best form for this tale since I had to cut out so much of it to make it fit.
I appreciate the honest observations and also the encouraging comments about what worked. Thank you so much for taking the time to read it a second time and for giving such a great review. Debi