Black Sky, Red Sun
Drifter with a story to tell.28 total reviews
Comment from seaglass
This brought memories of old Woody stories. It captures the mood and lingo of that times. The ending of the story would have to be something regarding the song mention in the introductory. You will have to finish it.
"loyalty bein' his (._main claim to fame and all." (remove rouge period.)
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This brought memories of old Woody stories. It captures the mood and lingo of that times. The ending of the story would have to be something regarding the song mention in the introductory. You will have to finish it.
"loyalty bein' his (._main claim to fame and all." (remove rouge period.)
Comment Written 14-Sep-2014
Comment from Tsukuyomi969
It's certainly intriguing. A string of murders, huh? Nothing makes a person keep reading more than the possibility of a killer.I hope you don't leave us hanging, cause I'd Iove to find out what happens next. Good job, and good luck in the contest.
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It's certainly intriguing. A string of murders, huh? Nothing makes a person keep reading more than the possibility of a killer.I hope you don't leave us hanging, cause I'd Iove to find out what happens next. Good job, and good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 14-Sep-2014
Comment from Mystic Angel 7777
Seems like lots of loss and dying going on so it would be interesting to know whether anyone other than the main character actually survived the holocaust of poverty. I wish you all the best in the voting and thank you so much for sharing this with me.
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Seems like lots of loss and dying going on so it would be interesting to know whether anyone other than the main character actually survived the holocaust of poverty. I wish you all the best in the voting and thank you so much for sharing this with me.
Comment Written 14-Sep-2014
Comment from emrpoems
you certainly succeeded in leaving at a point where we wished there was more and therefore satisfied the requirement of the prompt. Good luck in the cost
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you certainly succeeded in leaving at a point where we wished there was more and therefore satisfied the requirement of the prompt. Good luck in the cost
Comment Written 14-Sep-2014
Comment from Nosha17
Interesting story line, definitely potential for more, especially as he is into music and all that! Well drawn character, you definitely have the feel that he will be a loner and possibly get into some sort of trouble. Good use of descriptive language and cute dialect. Enjoyable read. Faye
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Interesting story line, definitely potential for more, especially as he is into music and all that! Well drawn character, you definitely have the feel that he will be a loner and possibly get into some sort of trouble. Good use of descriptive language and cute dialect. Enjoyable read. Faye
Comment Written 14-Sep-2014
Comment from nancy_e_davis
It made me think that maybe he was the one doing the killing.
Death seemed to follow him around plus the fact that he never really had parents to teach him right from wrong. If he gets discovered it will be by the law in my opinion.Too many murders when he is hanging around. Am I close Mikey? LOL Good story. Nancy
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It made me think that maybe he was the one doing the killing.
Death seemed to follow him around plus the fact that he never really had parents to teach him right from wrong. If he gets discovered it will be by the law in my opinion.Too many murders when he is hanging around. Am I close Mikey? LOL Good story. Nancy
Comment Written 14-Sep-2014
Comment from mommerry
I could see adjustments that needed to be made in this piece. The misspelling of business and ridin'. And I found it confusing where he says "we" were on the road for 10 years which made it sound like the dog was with him, and yet the dog was buried before he left town. This could be a very good story with some more work.
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I could see adjustments that needed to be made in this piece. The misspelling of business and ridin'. And I found it confusing where he says "we" were on the road for 10 years which made it sound like the dog was with him, and yet the dog was buried before he left town. This could be a very good story with some more work.
Comment Written 14-Sep-2014
Comment from nordicgirl
I can't believe someone gave you a three on this. Excellent piece with everything there to assume, but nothing really said. So you have to keep reading. You HAVE to know. Great last line withvthe possible double meaning..
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I can't believe someone gave you a three on this. Excellent piece with everything there to assume, but nothing really said. So you have to keep reading. You HAVE to know. Great last line withvthe possible double meaning..
Comment Written 14-Sep-2014
Comment from madhatter1977
I was intrigued by this and read it to the end. He certainly had a lot of bad luck in life and it's sad he lost so many family and the loyal dog. He is a bit creepy with his music and memories and the reader obviously wonders if he is a murderer himself! Good write and best wishes for the contest. Pete
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I was intrigued by this and read it to the end. He certainly had a lot of bad luck in life and it's sad he lost so many family and the loyal dog. He is a bit creepy with his music and memories and the reader obviously wonders if he is a murderer himself! Good write and best wishes for the contest. Pete
Comment Written 14-Sep-2014
Comment from CR Delport
I think musicians are a lot like writers. There are some very good ones out there waiting to be discovered. This is very well written, Mikey. Good luck.
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I think musicians are a lot like writers. There are some very good ones out there waiting to be discovered. This is very well written, Mikey. Good luck.
Comment Written 14-Sep-2014