senryu my sobriety
It is all about choices.18 total reviews
Comment from Donald O. Cassidy
Though not an expert at oetry, I fully appreciate the art, skill, nnd seriousness of others.
I think this contest entry lives up to quality and the standards of Sentryu 5-7-5 entry.
You employ figures of speech so well: "my sobriety fires the kiln that allows me to mold my own clay," (without quoting your poetic structure ).
Don
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Though not an expert at oetry, I fully appreciate the art, skill, nnd seriousness of others.
I think this contest entry lives up to quality and the standards of Sentryu 5-7-5 entry.
You employ figures of speech so well: "my sobriety fires the kiln that allows me to mold my own clay," (without quoting your poetic structure ).
Don
Comment Written 19-May-2014
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Thank you for the kind review.
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
Dallas,
This is a wonderful senryu and so deeply meaningful. I am glad your life turned around and you now write poetry instead. Your first place win is well deserved. Take care,Debbie
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Dallas,
This is a wonderful senryu and so deeply meaningful. I am glad your life turned around and you now write poetry instead. Your first place win is well deserved. Take care,Debbie
Comment Written 19-May-2014
reply by the author on 19-May-2014
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Thanks for the kind review, Debbie.
Comment from angel123
Your poem is exceptional written with wit and great thought. I enjoyed reading it and your artwork choice is great. It enhances your poem.
angel123
reply by the author on 18-May-2014
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Your poem is exceptional written with wit and great thought. I enjoyed reading it and your artwork choice is great. It enhances your poem.
angel123
Comment Written 18-May-2014
reply by the author on 18-May-2014
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Thanks for the great review and the bonus star.
Comment from Smoothiecool
good luck in the contest
your few chosen words allow the reader to see and feel that
one makes choices on ones life whether to be sober or not
flows well
cheers Smoothiecool
reply by the author on 18-May-2014
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good luck in the contest
your few chosen words allow the reader to see and feel that
one makes choices on ones life whether to be sober or not
flows well
cheers Smoothiecool
Comment Written 18-May-2014
reply by the author on 18-May-2014
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Thank you for reviewing.
Comment from kiwisteveh
I believe the purists would say that the metaphors you use here are not appropriate in a senryu, but I certainly like the vivid language which allows you to express how much you value your sobriety - long may it continue.
Good luck in the contest.
Steve
reply by the author on 18-May-2014
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I believe the purists would say that the metaphors you use here are not appropriate in a senryu, but I certainly like the vivid language which allows you to express how much you value your sobriety - long may it continue.
Good luck in the contest.
Steve
Comment Written 18-May-2014
reply by the author on 18-May-2014
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I guess I did kind of bend it a bit, but the contest said personification allowed and only seemed to stress the count. I am sure you are right, however.
Twenty seven years this August.
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My wife hits 20 years this September - looking forward to being counted as an old-timer. :O)
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Awesome.
Comment from Jean Lutz
Bravo! Thank you for using your talent and sobriety to tell others. May it help others to mold. You topped it with perfect artwork. Best wishes with the entry -- but then, all who succeed at sobriety WINS!
reply by the author on 17-May-2014
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Bravo! Thank you for using your talent and sobriety to tell others. May it help others to mold. You topped it with perfect artwork. Best wishes with the entry -- but then, all who succeed at sobriety WINS!
Comment Written 17-May-2014
reply by the author on 17-May-2014
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Thanks for the great review and the bonus six.. That's right, it is a win-win situation.
Comment from adewpearl
Clever pairing of artwork and poem, which is in excellent 5/7/5 syllable count for this contest
I really like your imagery and the thoughtful message it helps you convey
Brooke
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reply by the author on 17-May-2014
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Clever pairing of artwork and poem, which is in excellent 5/7/5 syllable count for this contest
I really like your imagery and the thoughtful message it helps you convey
Brooke
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-May-2014
reply by the author on 17-May-2014
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Thanks for reviewing.
Comment from Kingsland
That's a very interesting metaphor for this ultra short poetic format. The metaphor fits the title of the poem really well. I enjoyed reading and writing this response for it... John
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 17-May-2014
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That's a very interesting metaphor for this ultra short poetic format. The metaphor fits the title of the poem really well. I enjoyed reading and writing this response for it... John
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 17-May-2014
reply by the author on 17-May-2014
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Thank you for reviewing.
