Springtime in Hedgerow Village
Such a fun time in Hedgerow Village.19 total reviews
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Another cute episode... thinking spring early, I see! Don't blame you. I like how you have described the many types of eggs... educational, since most kids only use plain white ones. Maybe they would want to try brown one day for a different look... especially with a monster on it! LOL!
>>much longer to finish the den, everyone did their share
Comma should be either semi-colon or full stop and new sentence.
>>lots of brightly coloured paints
Need hyphen since the modifyier comes in front of the noun.
lots of brightly-coloured paints
>>Reggie the Rat chose a white egg, his was plain white with no speckles on it.
Remove the words HIS WAS, and this will be fine. Or else it must be two sentences. But I like the first choice better:
Reggie the Rat chose a white egg, plain white with no speckles on it.
>>snow last year, he would make the speckles
Comma will not do here. Full stop and new sentence...
snow last year. He would make the speckles
>> "Well done, everyone! Said, Miss Freda
Oops! Missing quotation mark.
>>lovely time, and now it was over, they took their eggs
Make two sentences, OR insert THAT:
lovely time, and now THAT it was over, they took their eggs
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2014
  |
Another cute episode... thinking spring early, I see! Don't blame you. I like how you have described the many types of eggs... educational, since most kids only use plain white ones. Maybe they would want to try brown one day for a different look... especially with a monster on it! LOL!
>>much longer to finish the den, everyone did their share
Comma should be either semi-colon or full stop and new sentence.
>>lots of brightly coloured paints
Need hyphen since the modifyier comes in front of the noun.
lots of brightly-coloured paints
>>Reggie the Rat chose a white egg, his was plain white with no speckles on it.
Remove the words HIS WAS, and this will be fine. Or else it must be two sentences. But I like the first choice better:
Reggie the Rat chose a white egg, plain white with no speckles on it.
>>snow last year, he would make the speckles
Comma will not do here. Full stop and new sentence...
snow last year. He would make the speckles
>> "Well done, everyone! Said, Miss Freda
Oops! Missing quotation mark.
>>lovely time, and now it was over, they took their eggs
Make two sentences, OR insert THAT:
lovely time, and now THAT it was over, they took their eggs
Comment Written 13-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2014
-
Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!! I have made all the corrections, I do so appreciate your help!! That was so nice of you to take the time and do that for me. I am really pleased you liked my story, tried hard to make it as hard-punching as your chapter with Ginger and Willie, but couldn't quite get it right!! LOL. Thank you, you are such a good friend! xsx Sandra
-
Glad to help. You could always have Vicki and Millie mud wrestle nude while the guys make bets. :)
-
LOL!! Where do you get your ideas from? Have you tried it!! xx
Comment from Jim Lorson Sr
Sandra, these Hedgerow characters are as much a part of my life as Cody and Alex is to yours. This story, written with wonderful interactions among all these human-like critters. Each with their own personalities. This is a great story about the den and of course, the egg painting and Miss Freda pointing out each of their well painted eggs. You have truly out-done yourself with this one. Very entertaining to say the least. Love you lady,,,,,,Jim xxx
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2014
 |
Sandra, these Hedgerow characters are as much a part of my life as Cody and Alex is to yours. This story, written with wonderful interactions among all these human-like critters. Each with their own personalities. This is a great story about the den and of course, the egg painting and Miss Freda pointing out each of their well painted eggs. You have truly out-done yourself with this one. Very entertaining to say the least. Love you lady,,,,,,Jim xxx
Comment Written 12-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2014
-
Oh, thank you so very much, my dear friend. What a lovely review you have given me. And 6 stars!! What can I say, you are a wonderful friend. Thank you so much, Jim. Love always, Sandra. xsx
Comment from 24chas
I think this is a perfect story for the little ones. It's the perfect length, got a nice flow, and memorable characters. Great job.
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2014
|
I think this is a perfect story for the little ones. It's the perfect length, got a nice flow, and memorable characters. Great job.
Comment Written 12-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2014
-
Thank you so much for your lovely review on this story. I am so pleased you enjoyed it! xsx Sandra
Comment from c_lucas
This story is well targeted for First graders and Pre-Schoolers. It has a smooth flow of words, making for a very interesting read.
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2014
|
This story is well targeted for First graders and Pre-Schoolers. It has a smooth flow of words, making for a very interesting read.
Comment Written 12-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2014
-
Thank you so much, Charlie, I do appreciate your words and thank you for reading it. :) Sandra
-
You're welcome, Sandra. Charlie
Comment from adewpearl
making their nests, so we decided - I added the comma
saw Timmy and Tommy Mouse, coming over - I would drop that comma
Excellent character development and dialogue throughout
Oh tickletums - that made me smile :-)
Tomorrow was the first day of spring, and everyone - add the comma
nice personification of moon and sun
Millie and Vicky, blushed - drop comma
blushed a pretty pink, - I would make that a semicolon or period
A delightful story :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2014
|
making their nests, so we decided - I added the comma
saw Timmy and Tommy Mouse, coming over - I would drop that comma
Excellent character development and dialogue throughout
Oh tickletums - that made me smile :-)
Tomorrow was the first day of spring, and everyone - add the comma
nice personification of moon and sun
Millie and Vicky, blushed - drop comma
blushed a pretty pink, - I would make that a semicolon or period
A delightful story :-) Brooke
Comment Written 12-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 13-Jan-2014
-
Thank you so very much, Brooke, doesn't matter how many times I go over my writing, you can always find a few more. LOL, I really try hard, but I am finding they are becoming fewer these days. A bit more going over my lessons with you, (fortunately all printed out!) and I WILL get there, promise!! :) Sandra
Comment from JB Lynn
I like the alliteration of the names, and that you named the Squirrel Cyril so the two would sound the same and hold the pattern. In a way, I almost wanted to see more of their full "names" reference, as opposed to just dropping to the "first" name. I think children would enjoy the repetition of "Reggie the Rat" and "Millie the Mole" and "Vicky the Vole" more than just "Reggie, Millie, and Vicky".
"whole wide world" - classic children's concept. Love it!
I love your characters. They're precious! This absolutely makes me want to go paint eggs. Your story reminds me of the Beatrix Potter stories I love so much. Thank you so much for sharing!
reply by the author on 12-Jan-2014
|
I like the alliteration of the names, and that you named the Squirrel Cyril so the two would sound the same and hold the pattern. In a way, I almost wanted to see more of their full "names" reference, as opposed to just dropping to the "first" name. I think children would enjoy the repetition of "Reggie the Rat" and "Millie the Mole" and "Vicky the Vole" more than just "Reggie, Millie, and Vicky".
"whole wide world" - classic children's concept. Love it!
I love your characters. They're precious! This absolutely makes me want to go paint eggs. Your story reminds me of the Beatrix Potter stories I love so much. Thank you so much for sharing!
Comment Written 12-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 12-Jan-2014
-
Thank you so much for your wonderful review, JB Lynn. I normally do put their whole name in, especially in my rhyming versions of these stories. I am delighted that you enjoyed this one, more will be coming! A big thank you for the 6 stars, and for the compliment of putting my story up there with Beatrix Potter! I will go and put there full names in. :) xsx Sandra
Comment from nancy_e_davis
Your little Hedgerow critters are a great way to brighten our day. Great bedtime stories for the children, to send them off to dreamland. You have a lovely imagination Sandra. Very enjoyable.xsx Nancy
reply by the author on 12-Jan-2014
|
Your little Hedgerow critters are a great way to brighten our day. Great bedtime stories for the children, to send them off to dreamland. You have a lovely imagination Sandra. Very enjoyable.xsx Nancy
Comment Written 12-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 12-Jan-2014
-
OH, thank you so much, Nancy, I am really pleased you liked it. Huge hugs for the 6 stars, my friend! xsx Sandra
Comment from Darkhorse555
what a delightfully beautiful piece of writing warms the heart reading this piece an amazing story for children excellently penned really enjoyed
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 12-Jan-2014
|
what a delightfully beautiful piece of writing warms the heart reading this piece an amazing story for children excellently penned really enjoyed
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 12-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 12-Jan-2014
-
Thank you! What a lovely review. I am so pleased you enjoyed my little story! xsx Sandra
Comment from Gungalo
Such a great story Sandra and such great characters too. Can't help but want to follow them in all their escapades. Kepp 'em coming girl.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 12-Jan-2014
|
Such a great story Sandra and such great characters too. Can't help but want to follow them in all their escapades. Kepp 'em coming girl.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 12-Jan-2014
reply by the author on 12-Jan-2014
-
Aw, thank you, Gungalo, so pleased you liked it! :) Sandra
-
Smiling at you Sandra. Kids will love it.