All Those Puzzling Pieces
Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "Not, Not, NOT!"What makes a life? How do the pieces fit?
51 total reviews
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Sharyn, that completely threw me, what a wonderful poem with a wonderful ending!! It is just what a young child could and would believe, just so long as you have hold of daddies hand. This is such a good contest entry, Good luck, Sharyn. xsx Sandra
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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Sharyn, that completely threw me, what a wonderful poem with a wonderful ending!! It is just what a young child could and would believe, just so long as you have hold of daddies hand. This is such a good contest entry, Good luck, Sharyn. xsx Sandra
Comment Written 09-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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oh bless you Sandra! I'm so glad you enjoyed this little one and a huge 'thank you' for your delightful six!
:)Sharyn
Comment from Charlene0513
To visionary1234,
A little of nostalgia as you look back at some of the great times you had with your dad.
Good expressive adjectives put into your 3rd stanza.
Charlene
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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To visionary1234,
A little of nostalgia as you look back at some of the great times you had with your dad.
Good expressive adjectives put into your 3rd stanza.
Charlene
Comment Written 09-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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yes indeed Charlene - thank you! :)Sharyn
Comment from Maria C.
Hello Sharyn! This is a very sweet entry for the Child's Perspective contest. Good use of alliteration with whirly waves. Very descriptive wording with big white bubbled curls on top, blue water mountain, and bigger, huger gianter teeth. Great Onomatopoia.
I love the picture too.
Hugs,
Maria C.
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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Hello Sharyn! This is a very sweet entry for the Child's Perspective contest. Good use of alliteration with whirly waves. Very descriptive wording with big white bubbled curls on top, blue water mountain, and bigger, huger gianter teeth. Great Onomatopoia.
I love the picture too.
Hugs,
Maria C.
Comment Written 09-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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aah, thank you so much Maria!
Blessings,
Sharyn
Comment from rosehill (Wendy)
How well I remember that feeling of safety, knowing that just holding my father's hand was enough to keep me forever from harm. This is a great entry. The repetition is so demonstrative of how a child works through their fears and questions. The onomatopoeia is great and I wish you a strong second place in the contest ;) - Wendy
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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How well I remember that feeling of safety, knowing that just holding my father's hand was enough to keep me forever from harm. This is a great entry. The repetition is so demonstrative of how a child works through their fears and questions. The onomatopoeia is great and I wish you a strong second place in the contest ;) - Wendy
Comment Written 09-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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aaah you naughty thing - that means I'll have to go and read yours, hmm?
:)))))
ps: just got my B&B permit renewal today! oh YEAH! "THEY" are now out of my lives FOREVER!!!!!
Comment from Jumbo J
Hi Sharyn,
classic picture to capture a distant memory of what beautiful history brings and an even more classic perspective you've written, with such descriptive phrasing that you feel like you're on the journey yourself ... Beautiful imagery and a magic imagination ... All the best for this prompt ... This did bring a smile that lasted!
Kindest thoughts,
James xx
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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Hi Sharyn,
classic picture to capture a distant memory of what beautiful history brings and an even more classic perspective you've written, with such descriptive phrasing that you feel like you're on the journey yourself ... Beautiful imagery and a magic imagination ... All the best for this prompt ... This did bring a smile that lasted!
Kindest thoughts,
James xx
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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Always happy to bring a smile to your delightful face James! :)S
Comment from jjstar
I started reading before I saw that this was a child's perspective writing prompt. When I got to the 'I'm not scared' in the first stanza I thought it sounded like a kiddo talking. Then I went back to check. Ah, but of course! Hehe..takes me awhile sometimes..
Anyway, I thought the repetition of words and onomonopia embodied a child's thought processes and that moment when they follow through on a scary challenge they've issued themselves. Loved the ending!
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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I started reading before I saw that this was a child's perspective writing prompt. When I got to the 'I'm not scared' in the first stanza I thought it sounded like a kiddo talking. Then I went back to check. Ah, but of course! Hehe..takes me awhile sometimes..
Anyway, I thought the repetition of words and onomonopia embodied a child's thought processes and that moment when they follow through on a scary challenge they've issued themselves. Loved the ending!
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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Thx so much jj! :)S
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You're so welcome...xo
Comment from Sasha
This is such a delightful and fun poem. It is also a terrific entry for this contest. I could feel the child's enthusiasm with each word. Very, very nice work with this one and I wish you all the best in the contest too.
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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This is such a delightful and fun poem. It is also a terrific entry for this contest. I could feel the child's enthusiasm with each word. Very, very nice work with this one and I wish you all the best in the contest too.
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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what a sweetie - thx so much my dear! I thought you were slowing down??????
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thx so much my dear ... thought you were slowing down??????
Comment from Vampires kiss
awww this is a cute poem!! You did good explaining how a child might have felt during a, I think anyway, possible almost drowning. It's cute that the child is not afraid because he holding his dads hand!! Wonderful job!!
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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awww this is a cute poem!! You did good explaining how a child might have felt during a, I think anyway, possible almost drowning. It's cute that the child is not afraid because he holding his dads hand!! Wonderful job!!
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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thx so much Vk! :)S
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thx so much Vk! :)S
Comment from Opal H.
Oh, Sharyn, this poem's so adorable! And everyone who's been a kid can relate to this one. Don't we all recall a time when our parents were the only thing making us feel bold?
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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Oh, Sharyn, this poem's so adorable! And everyone who's been a kid can relate to this one. Don't we all recall a time when our parents were the only thing making us feel bold?
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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absolutely! thank you Opal! :)S
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Bless you Opal! :)S
Comment from Tonulak
Dear Sharon,
I liked what you did here. Not only did you write from a child's perspctive, but your language captured a child's veiw and vocabulary. The repitition is also a child's technique, as I'm sure you know;) Good luck in the contest--Ted
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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Dear Sharon,
I liked what you did here. Not only did you write from a child's perspctive, but your language captured a child's veiw and vocabulary. The repitition is also a child's technique, as I'm sure you know;) Good luck in the contest--Ted
Comment Written 08-Jul-2013
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2013
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Thank you so much Ted - for some reason, I find it very easy to write in 'child' voice - and I adored my dad ...
:)S
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Such an easy voice to find in myself Ted - I'm grateful for that! :)S