Poems from a Pensive Poet
Viewing comments for Chapter 15 "The End of the Line"Verses from my heart
28 total reviews
Comment from Mastery
Hi, Beth. Well, they won't let me give you a six cuz I already did once, but this sure deserves one. Brilliant and a bit funny.
"
Then in time, the maids grew bitter
left unplucked upon the vine."
I loved it. Bob
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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Hi, Beth. Well, they won't let me give you a six cuz I already did once, but this sure deserves one. Brilliant and a bit funny.
"
Then in time, the maids grew bitter
left unplucked upon the vine."
I loved it. Bob
Comment Written 12-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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Thank you so much Bob. I really appreciate the review and the thought that you'd like to give me a six is as good as getting one. I'm so glad you liked it.
Beth
Comment from rtobaygo
No truer words have been spoken. Yet there are incidents when the parent has to step in to prevent their offspring from making a choice that, based on the experience of human nature, saves one much heartache and regrets.
Well done!
Take care,
Ray
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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No truer words have been spoken. Yet there are incidents when the parent has to step in to prevent their offspring from making a choice that, based on the experience of human nature, saves one much heartache and regrets.
Well done!
Take care,
Ray
Comment Written 12-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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Thank you so much for the six star review Ray. I'm so glad you liked it. I have no problem with guidance. Kids need that but it is dictatorship that leads to problems. Kids today would just rebel and you'd lose them.
Beth
Comment from marion
Hi Beth
I enjoyed this simply written poem - The End of the Line. It has a great end message. The sterness and properness of these maids in the photo compared to say, a photgragph of the same women in today's age, would show huge difference! What changes in society in what really is only a small time frame. Nice flow, well written. Marion
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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Hi Beth
I enjoyed this simply written poem - The End of the Line. It has a great end message. The sterness and properness of these maids in the photo compared to say, a photgragph of the same women in today's age, would show huge difference! What changes in society in what really is only a small time frame. Nice flow, well written. Marion
Comment Written 12-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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Thank you Marion. I really appreciate the review and you insightful comments. Yes, there is a huge difference in today's ladies. Back then they were stiff and proper and never smiled for photos and usually did what they parents said whether they liked it or not. Today's woman are a lot more liberated. I'm glad I wasn't born back then.
Beth
Comment from MeganLinton1
That poem was so fluid and well thought out! I loved it from beginning to end. It told a story and displayed a great final message. It also coincided perfectly with the picture for more precise visuals. Well done!
Best,
Meg
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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That poem was so fluid and well thought out! I loved it from beginning to end. It told a story and displayed a great final message. It also coincided perfectly with the picture for more precise visuals. Well done!
Best,
Meg
Comment Written 12-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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Thank you so much Meg for the review and the lovely comments. I'm so glad you like it. The picture seemed worth writing about.
Beth
Comment from Spitfire
One of those women looks like man! I suspect your poem is closer to the truth that you think. Excellent end rhyme that doesn't sound forced. The last stanza is the universal message that makes this poem worth six.
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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One of those women looks like man! I suspect your poem is closer to the truth that you think. Excellent end rhyme that doesn't sound forced. The last stanza is the universal message that makes this poem worth six.
Comment Written 12-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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Yep, you're right. One does look like a man. None of them look like someone I'm want to spend time with. Thank you so much for the six star review. I'm so glad you liked the message.
Beth
Comment from barbara.wilkey
Oh my, your words of wisdom are very strong with this poem. It is so true!! Kids need to chose their own life and they need to make their own mistakes. I tell my friends you need to love them through it.
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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Oh my, your words of wisdom are very strong with this poem. It is so true!! Kids need to chose their own life and they need to make their own mistakes. I tell my friends you need to love them through it.
Comment Written 12-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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Thank you Barbara. I really appreciate the review and wise comments.
Beth
Comment from adewpearl
what a fantastic photo!!!
excellent use of abcb rhyme
good use of enjambment to keep the lines flowing
love the image of these spinsters left unplucked upon the vine
Parent's shouldn't pick - drop the apostrophe
good alliteration in parents shouldn't pick the pathway
a thoughtful portrait of this family with a good cautionary message
Brooke
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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what a fantastic photo!!!
excellent use of abcb rhyme
good use of enjambment to keep the lines flowing
love the image of these spinsters left unplucked upon the vine
Parent's shouldn't pick - drop the apostrophe
good alliteration in parents shouldn't pick the pathway
a thoughtful portrait of this family with a good cautionary message
Brooke
Comment Written 12-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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Thank you Brooke. I appreciate the review and thoughtful comments. I thought it was a fantastic photo too. It begged to have something written about it.
Beth
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my husband was a photographer and photo historian who collected great pictures - he would have LOVED this one :-)
Comment from justjo66
Great story and imagination inspired by just a
picture. I loved the moral at the end. Your poem
reads very easy with a nice rhythm. I liked it
very much. Sorry, I haven't been on in a long time,
I'm still writing my first novel. Hoping to finish
it soon.
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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Great story and imagination inspired by just a
picture. I loved the moral at the end. Your poem
reads very easy with a nice rhythm. I liked it
very much. Sorry, I haven't been on in a long time,
I'm still writing my first novel. Hoping to finish
it soon.
Comment Written 12-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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Thank you so much for the review and the encouraging remarks. Good luck on the novel. That is a huge undertaking.
Beth
Comment from Mrs Jones
Nice rhythm and rhyme Beth. I enjoyed reading this well structured verse. Delightful and entertaining.
Well done
Cheers
Rose
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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Nice rhythm and rhyme Beth. I enjoyed reading this well structured verse. Delightful and entertaining.
Well done
Cheers
Rose
Comment Written 12-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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Thank you Rose. I'm so glad you enjoyed it. I appreciate the review and comments.
Beth
Comment from ephraim crud, COS.
excellent moral in this poem Beth and I totally agree for I have seen this first hand - you are right, everyone involved may lose. best wishes Connie
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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excellent moral in this poem Beth and I totally agree for I have seen this first hand - you are right, everyone involved may lose. best wishes Connie
Comment Written 12-Jun-2013
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2013
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Thank you Connie. I truly appreciate the review and nice comments.
Beth