And then there's Grace
Viewing comments for Chapter 14 "Heavens Door"A collection of Spirtual poems
16 total reviews
Comment from Righteous Riter
I'm drawn to real life things. Abuse is real and I feel is piece. My attention is capture from the title and it captured even more as I read on. The rhyming is good. The flow and harmony is good but the message is the best. When we leave this world we will hurt no more, Amen. Good job.
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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I'm drawn to real life things. Abuse is real and I feel is piece. My attention is capture from the title and it captured even more as I read on. The rhyming is good. The flow and harmony is good but the message is the best. When we leave this world we will hurt no more, Amen. Good job.
Comment Written 30-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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Yes it is a real thing. I appreciate that you got the meaning of the write. Best always to you, Carolyn
Comment from Val Crisson
Very well written poem on the subject of child abuse, and the hope of peace in a heavenly place after so much suffering in a young life. I liked the plain presentation, and thought the flow and rhyming quite good.
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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Very well written poem on the subject of child abuse, and the hope of peace in a heavenly place after so much suffering in a young life. I liked the plain presentation, and thought the flow and rhyming quite good.
Comment Written 30-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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Thank you for your kind comment. Writings such as this trouble me but the hope of the forever place awaits. Carolyn
Comment from mumsyone
Your poem presents a vivid picture of abuse. Most of the rhyme works; the rhythm is a little irratic.
Title: Heavens (Heaven's) Door
Heavens (Heaven's) Door
Bruise on cheek from hands (hand's) hard blow
Injuries to (too) deep to hide
Self(-)esteem is but a word
To (Too) late to save
To (Too) late to pray
Once she enters
Heavens (Heaven's) door.
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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Your poem presents a vivid picture of abuse. Most of the rhyme works; the rhythm is a little irratic.
Title: Heavens (Heaven's) Door
Heavens (Heaven's) Door
Bruise on cheek from hands (hand's) hard blow
Injuries to (too) deep to hide
Self(-)esteem is but a word
To (Too) late to save
To (Too) late to pray
Once she enters
Heavens (Heaven's) door.
Comment Written 30-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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Thank you so much for the good edit. I will change right away. Carolyn
Comment from gypsycaravan
Beautiful poem. It reads lyrically. Too much of this abuse and cruelty in our world, but you've left me with a much more pleasant image in my mind of the gentle spirits soothing and erasing prior sadness. Good job with this writing.
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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Beautiful poem. It reads lyrically. Too much of this abuse and cruelty in our world, but you've left me with a much more pleasant image in my mind of the gentle spirits soothing and erasing prior sadness. Good job with this writing.
Comment Written 30-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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I appreciate your review and the understanding of this writing. Thank you, Carolyn
Comment from Rondeno
In the CSI stanza, it should be "too" late, on both occasions. Forgive me for not awarding this any more points, but the facile narrative is rather well-worn.
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reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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In the CSI stanza, it should be "too" late, on both occasions. Forgive me for not awarding this any more points, but the facile narrative is rather well-worn.
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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Thank you for your honesty. I agree it is a well worn subject but unfortunately will never be resolved. The news of late has troubled me so I was prompted to write. I appreciate the edits and will fix them. :-) Best to you always, Carolyn
Comment from Maureen's Pen
Hi Carolyn, this is a deeply troubling poem to read due to the abuse received but I liked the last few lines where you let us know all the pains in his world are not remembered once past heavens door.
Well penned and thought provoking too:)
Thanks for sharing it.
Maureen
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reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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Hi Carolyn, this is a deeply troubling poem to read due to the abuse received but I liked the last few lines where you let us know all the pains in his world are not remembered once past heavens door.
Well penned and thought provoking too:)
Thanks for sharing it.
Maureen
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-Jan-2013
reply by the author on 30-Jan-2013
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Thanks for the review, it was troubling to write, the news carries the death of a little one far to often. there can only be one blessing of the loss of a young life. Thats eternity with joy forever. Have a wonderful day. Carolyn