Comment from rjuselius

Excellent

this is a morbid version of cinderella. i find it humorous and witty. the rhyme is well-done and the inherent rhythm follows the rules.
thank you for sharing!
good luck in the contest!
rebekka x

 Comment Written 10-Nov-2012

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reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012

Hi Rebekka, I guess it is a bit of a walk on the dark side, but the originals from the Brothers Grimm and from France, not Disney, were very dark indeed. It was an interesting form to squeeze the tale into, but I love a good puzzle. Thank you for the read and the review.--Wendy

Comment from prayingpoet

Excellent

Great poem and you deserved to be recognized with the all time best. Thanks for sharing your talent with words. I so enjoy reading great poetry.

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2012

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reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012

Thank you Janice for taking the time to read and review my words. I am humbled by yours--Wendy

Comment from Dawn Munro

Excellent

Oh what a marvelous lento! I loved this poem - the story, the rhyme, the wonderful meter, everything about it is absolutely delightful! (I think you've re-written this tale into another classic! LOL) Wish I still had a six to give!

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2012

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reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012

Thank you my reciprocal stalker. I will take a rain check on that six. I might even write another lento some day if my hair ever grows back in. ;)--Wendy

reply by Dawn Munro on 10-Nov-2012

LOL - you are very welcome.

Comment from artemis53

Excellent

Excellent piece. I never thought Cinderella was as happy and carefree as Disney portrayed her. She probably was a sorceress that they cleaned up ;)

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2012

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reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012

I think that happy-go-lucky Fairy Godmother was a demon in disguise too. That said, the originals of the era--from Grimm, France and the Netherlands were dark indeed. Revenge was a recurring message for the kids of the day. I appreciate the read and review and the stars--Wendy

Comment from Bina1

Exceptional

How great was this! What a twist on Cinderella, thank you for sharing. A fine entry for the contest, good luck. Love your art selection, whole presentation.

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2012

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reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012

Thank you for reading and reviewing my work. I'm so glad you enjoyed it.--Wendy

Comment from Terror2s

Excellent

Cinderella is one of my favorite fairytales, so this was a pleasure to read. The rhymes flowed smoothly and you captures the well known story with your own twist. T2

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2012

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reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012

Hello again Terror2's. I am glad you enjoy Cinderella in all her incarnations. I appreciate that you mentioned the rhymes as that is important to me. Thanks for the read, the review and the stars.--Wendy

Comment from l.raven

Excellent

Not exactly the Cinderella I remember reading. But A great write. This is very well written. And has a great rhythm and rhyme to it. But I must say.The picture is a perfect match. well done

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2012

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reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012

Good Morning. Yes, a trip back to the dark side of Cinderella before Disney cleaned her up. I appreciate your note of the rhyme and rhythm as that is important to me. The artwork just jumped out at me and asked to be posted. Thank you for taking the time to read and review my work.--Wendy

Comment from Deorre Leonard

Excellent

Wed to prince his kingdom shared,dead step sisters how who knows? Dread the fate of those who dared tread on Cinderella toes. Nicely done. Deorre

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2012

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reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012

Thank you Deorre for taking the time to read and review my words.--Wendy

Comment from Humbly K

Excellent

Wonderful poem, I enjoyed reading from start to finish and very captivating too. Great work on the rhyme scheme, I very much enjoyed the rhymes. Finally a very descriptive, creative and imaginative piece of work. Keep it up!

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2012

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reply by the author on 10-Nov-2012

Hello Humbly K and welcome to FanStory. I appreciate your taking the time to read and review my work. Thank you for noting the rhymes as that is quite important to me. I hope you have a great deal of fun here on FS and if you have questions, give a holler or write something on "what would you like to share" and you will have tons of folks who will help (after a witty remark or two at your expense, but all done in fun and love). So, let the writing begin!--Wendy (aka rosehill)

reply by Humbly K on 10-Nov-2012

Your welcome and thanks for the tips, I really appreciate them. Could you please help me by checking out my poem and reviewing it, many thanks.

Comment from Aaron James

Excellent

The technical attributes of the Lento are I think very difficult to achieve. I have played around with the form but never managed to complete one that I felt had any cohesion. Usually the form is abandoned and a poem is created but a Lento it is not. So, I am very impressed that not only have you created a poem using the format but you have kept a cohesive story to your poem.

Some of the rhymes I think are a little loose:

To,through/rue/true and fairy, tarry/marry, wary

Of course that may be simply pronunciation.

Simply an impressive piece.

Kind regards
Aaron

 Comment Written 09-Nov-2012

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reply by the author on 09-Nov-2012

Hello Aaron. I appreciate your taking the time to do a thorough read and review. Yes it is indeed the accent that makes the listed words seem a bit shy of true to you. All of those words are exact rhymes in good old American. I have an abhorrence for near or slant rhymes as they call them and would never have one in any poem of mine. Just my personal preference. I am glad that you enjoyed the piece. If my hair ever grows back in, I may try another.--Wendy