The Heir Apparent
Viewing comments for Chapter 56 "The Heir Apparent"A family learns their father is a serial killer
24 total reviews
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
A great chapter, Sasha, tying up all loose ends. I've
thoroughly enjoyed your story, and hope soon you will
bring on anothere, my friend.
Myself, I feel somewhat relieved to finish ALizah, and move on to something different.
"Yes, I think Grandmother would have liked that."
"Mac, thanks for coming to the funeral. That meant a lot to me."
You might consider closing these 2 lines up since both are from James.
If I had a six, it would be yours, my friend.
Margaret
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
  |
A great chapter, Sasha, tying up all loose ends. I've
thoroughly enjoyed your story, and hope soon you will
bring on anothere, my friend.
Myself, I feel somewhat relieved to finish ALizah, and move on to something different.
"Yes, I think Grandmother would have liked that."
"Mac, thanks for coming to the funeral. That meant a lot to me."
You might consider closing these 2 lines up since both are from James.
If I had a six, it would be yours, my friend.
Margaret
Comment Written 21-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
-
Thank you for your virtual 6. Your comments and suggestions are always welcome. I am thrilled you enjoyed this story.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
How, you have a great novel on your hands and I am sure a publisher out there can't wait to pick it up. Great job with this one.
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
|
How, you have a great novel on your hands and I am sure a publisher out there can't wait to pick it up. Great job with this one.
Comment Written 21-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
-
Thank you so very much. I do hope you are right!
Comment from xxjsfuncxxxity
A nice twist on the ''Happy Ending'' here. I loved the way you managed to pull together the whole backstory of the book in one simple exchange of brilliant dialogue...
"Do you think you'll ever have another case as crazy as this one?"
"Do you mean one with serial killers, bodies buried in backyard gardens, kidnappers, gypsies, curses, and a smart ass kid genius taking over and solving the case? No, a homicide detective only gets one of those in a career."
A hard task to pull off without it seeming ''leading'' but you've done it here with flying colors. Great read. Fantastic dialogue all the way through.
cheers
js
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
|
A nice twist on the ''Happy Ending'' here. I loved the way you managed to pull together the whole backstory of the book in one simple exchange of brilliant dialogue...
"Do you think you'll ever have another case as crazy as this one?"
"Do you mean one with serial killers, bodies buried in backyard gardens, kidnappers, gypsies, curses, and a smart ass kid genius taking over and solving the case? No, a homicide detective only gets one of those in a career."
A hard task to pull off without it seeming ''leading'' but you've done it here with flying colors. Great read. Fantastic dialogue all the way through.
cheers
js
Comment Written 21-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
-
Thank you. I felt that there was no need to give a blow by blow of what occurred since the reader already read the book. Glad you like the ending.
Comment from marcellawachtel
Dear Sasha,
A lovely ending to a story that had so many twists and turns to keep your readers on edge, so many directions you might have taken and so much really good writing. I think your plot sequencing (I think I made up that term, but you know what I mean) was skillful and innovative. Congratulations on finishing this great story. And of course, I am looking forward to more.
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
|
Dear Sasha,
A lovely ending to a story that had so many twists and turns to keep your readers on edge, so many directions you might have taken and so much really good writing. I think your plot sequencing (I think I made up that term, but you know what I mean) was skillful and innovative. Congratulations on finishing this great story. And of course, I am looking forward to more.
Comment Written 21-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
-
Thank you. I felt that there was no need to give a blow by blow of what occurred since the reader already read the book. Glad you like the ending.
Comment from Janie King
Great finish..I'm going to miss the stories about Jsmes but I'm sure he will move on to much better things now. I liked it that you have him moving in with Angela. God bless/
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
|
Great finish..I'm going to miss the stories about Jsmes but I'm sure he will move on to much better things now. I liked it that you have him moving in with Angela. God bless/
Comment Written 21-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 21-Jul-2012
-
Yes, I felt he and Angela would make a perfect couple.
Comment from rosmarton
I really appreciated the 'List of characters', this is a colourful method of leading into creating an immediate interest in the story.
I did get a bit confused over attendance at the funeral though. Gratitude for 'coming' to the funeral, I read that the speaker was not in attendance himself so that did not equate for me.
Great dialogue, it reveals the story without long explanation
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
 |
I really appreciated the 'List of characters', this is a colourful method of leading into creating an immediate interest in the story.
I did get a bit confused over attendance at the funeral though. Gratitude for 'coming' to the funeral, I read that the speaker was not in attendance himself so that did not equate for me.
Great dialogue, it reveals the story without long explanation
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 20-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
-
James didn't go to his father's funeral but he did go to his grandmother's (Alfina) funeral. That's what I was referring to when he thanked Mac for attending.
-
Thankyou for that. It is encouraging to see that only a partial view into a story is not sufficient to appreciate the full text
-
Also, reading the last chapter with no further input makes it hard too...lol
Comment from CALLAHANMR
Hi Valerie:)
Well you did ia magnificent job with this difficult subject. Mac sums the whole book up in his own special summary after James asks his opinion:
"Do you think you'll ever have another case as crazy as this one?"
"Do you mean one with serial killers, bodies buried in backyard gardens, kidnappers, gypsies, curses, and a smart ass kid genius taking over and solving the case? No, a homicide detective only gets one of those in a career."
No comment I can make will ever top this brief conversation.,
I'm sending you more love and Irish Hugs for a great read. Now for the movie.
Roger
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
|
Hi Valerie:)
Well you did ia magnificent job with this difficult subject. Mac sums the whole book up in his own special summary after James asks his opinion:
"Do you think you'll ever have another case as crazy as this one?"
"Do you mean one with serial killers, bodies buried in backyard gardens, kidnappers, gypsies, curses, and a smart ass kid genius taking over and solving the case? No, a homicide detective only gets one of those in a career."
No comment I can make will ever top this brief conversation.,
I'm sending you more love and Irish Hugs for a great read. Now for the movie.
Roger
Comment Written 20-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
-
Glad you liked this one. I didn't want to belabor the point and go into a long drawn out detailed explanation of what had happened. I need to get this published first, then we can talk about the movie...lol
Comment from c_lucas
Congrats on completing your novel. It took hard work and commitment on your part and a long spell of reading on mine, but you have a terrific story.
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
 |
Congrats on completing your novel. It took hard work and commitment on your part and a long spell of reading on mine, but you have a terrific story.
Comment Written 20-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
-
Thanks so much for the awesome 6 stars and generous review. I must be honest and say, I am so glad this book is finally done!!!
-
I had faith in you to finish, especially when I seen the direction of your third rewrit. Maybe the second. original, rewrite one, and rewrite two.
-
I still have some editing to do...lol but not too much.
Comment from Cornelius2000
I'm coming in late on this one, and finding it most interesting. You write good, natural, believable dialogue, which helps bring the characters alive. It's well written and I didn't find anything I would change.
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
|
I'm coming in late on this one, and finding it most interesting. You write good, natural, believable dialogue, which helps bring the characters alive. It's well written and I didn't find anything I would change.
Comment Written 20-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
-
Thanks. I come from a large family of avid talkers...so dialogue seems to come easy for me. I am thrilled you liked this one despite not having followed the whole story.
Comment from Giddy Nielsen-Sweep
Congratulations! This has been an outstanding story. So many unusual elements. As well as the drama we followed, there was so much interesting information. if Is the book going into print? I hope so. Giddy
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
|
Congratulations! This has been an outstanding story. So many unusual elements. As well as the drama we followed, there was so much interesting information. if Is the book going into print? I hope so. Giddy
Comment Written 20-Jul-2012
reply by the author on 20-Jul-2012
-
Thank you so much for your continued interest in this story and your awesome 6 stars. I have wanted to write this story for a long, long time. Now, I am just glad it is finally finished.
