Reflections For The New Day
Viewing comments for Chapter 24 "The New Song"19 total reviews
Comment from made2soar
Very nicely sung, I mean written and you picked a great picture. Any song you sang I would gladly listen. I would even let you sing me to sleep. Sometimes we all need to hear that new song, best when the timing is right. Thanks, Jim
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Very nicely sung, I mean written and you picked a great picture. Any song you sang I would gladly listen. I would even let you sing me to sleep. Sometimes we all need to hear that new song, best when the timing is right. Thanks, Jim
Comment Written 26-Feb-2005
Comment from Tweedypie
There are some that we hold for a while.
I will sing it loud
I will sing it clear
when it is time
for you to hear.
I like the way you ended this one. That's what all poets do.
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There are some that we hold for a while.
I will sing it loud
I will sing it clear
when it is time
for you to hear.
I like the way you ended this one. That's what all poets do.
Comment Written 25-Feb-2005
Comment from El Romantico
Let the music play and the song be heard for I know that it must come from your heart. That heart is like gold. Valuable, yet purer than anything imaginable. Thanks for the read.
P.S. I hate to point out things but here are a few for you to look at:
"Why do I stay satisfied ?" - One to many spaces.
"the music that plays it's" - should be without the apostrophe.
"a new abundant life
it could be time to sing
a new song." - Something seems like it is missing here but I can't quite put my finger on it.
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Let the music play and the song be heard for I know that it must come from your heart. That heart is like gold. Valuable, yet purer than anything imaginable. Thanks for the read.
P.S. I hate to point out things but here are a few for you to look at:
"Why do I stay satisfied ?" - One to many spaces.
"the music that plays it's" - should be without the apostrophe.
"a new abundant life
it could be time to sing
a new song." - Something seems like it is missing here but I can't quite put my finger on it.
Comment Written 25-Feb-2005
Comment from EmileJP
You have a good sense of rhyme and rhythm and can put feelings into your word choices, however it seemed strained especially the last verse...it sounds awkward and needs work. The poem is structured well and flows ok. You use good imagery and maintain a poetic flow throughout the whole piece. Sounds good, rhymes ok and has some emotional weight.
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You have a good sense of rhyme and rhythm and can put feelings into your word choices, however it seemed strained especially the last verse...it sounds awkward and needs work. The poem is structured well and flows ok. You use good imagery and maintain a poetic flow throughout the whole piece. Sounds good, rhymes ok and has some emotional weight.
Comment Written 25-Feb-2005
Comment from Bloomer Burbs
Forgive my arogance but you are moving on. your words express your talent/ desire to move on. You are seconds away and you know it. i remember reading a review someone gave you, they said 'why don't you go professional'
Your respose, 'well i am going to', just like that, without a care or seconds thought.
You feel it inside yourself, it's in your heart, do it, it's you, have faith and dare i say confidence? The irony of life. Bugger the past, what do you have but the now. After reading this, your other work, i have faith, but remember i'm only a brat?
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Forgive my arogance but you are moving on. your words express your talent/ desire to move on. You are seconds away and you know it. i remember reading a review someone gave you, they said 'why don't you go professional'
Your respose, 'well i am going to', just like that, without a care or seconds thought.
You feel it inside yourself, it's in your heart, do it, it's you, have faith and dare i say confidence? The irony of life. Bugger the past, what do you have but the now. After reading this, your other work, i have faith, but remember i'm only a brat?
Comment Written 25-Feb-2005
Comment from shelley kaye
A song waits
in the back of my mind
my song is still waiting
for i cant seem to find it
LOL
beautifully written
and awesome pic and colors
goes great together!
thanx for sharing :)
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A song waits
in the back of my mind
my song is still waiting
for i cant seem to find it
LOL
beautifully written
and awesome pic and colors
goes great together!
thanx for sharing :)
Comment Written 25-Feb-2005
Comment from WhistleNDixieGirl
Almost like a new love beginning, and you soon realize you may be falling for that special someone. But, you are so afraid they might not feel the same way you do, so you keep your feelings to yourself until you know for sure they have the same feelings for you. Very nice, I like it.
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Almost like a new love beginning, and you soon realize you may be falling for that special someone. But, you are so afraid they might not feel the same way you do, so you keep your feelings to yourself until you know for sure they have the same feelings for you. Very nice, I like it.
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 25-Feb-2005
Comment from Elizabeth Clark
So wonderful, the release from the day before and its troubled whatevers. LOL a fresh new morning with the glass of life now full vs half empty. Bless you on the healing path. I am going to become a new fan. Mary
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So wonderful, the release from the day before and its troubled whatevers. LOL a fresh new morning with the glass of life now full vs half empty. Bless you on the healing path. I am going to become a new fan. Mary
Comment Written 25-Feb-2005
Comment from New Day Rising
Very enchanting poem! The flow and rhythm were almost like a lullaby. But the meaning ran deep. Professing ones feelings is not always an easy thing to do. Especialy those three little words-a wise observation. Trust must be built to a level where both are in the same place and that is not always easy to judge. It is always wise to have some perception of loves blinding powers and stay a little tempered. Anyway that was my take on this beautiful poem. Strong writing.
Robert
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Very enchanting poem! The flow and rhythm were almost like a lullaby. But the meaning ran deep. Professing ones feelings is not always an easy thing to do. Especialy those three little words-a wise observation. Trust must be built to a level where both are in the same place and that is not always easy to judge. It is always wise to have some perception of loves blinding powers and stay a little tempered. Anyway that was my take on this beautiful poem. Strong writing.
Robert
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 25-Feb-2005
