My Funeral
A child wonders about her funeral.26 total reviews
Comment from mauial
Interesting write and it all boils down to that three letter word, why. I think most of us at one time ponder the questions you pose, but not so much so in our carefree days of youth, unless we experience loss like you did. Your last question, I have pondered myself. But the ultimate question is why do we die? And that is the one that in a strange way brings me the most comfort, because I know it will be fixed one day.
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2012
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Interesting write and it all boils down to that three letter word, why. I think most of us at one time ponder the questions you pose, but not so much so in our carefree days of youth, unless we experience loss like you did. Your last question, I have pondered myself. But the ultimate question is why do we die? And that is the one that in a strange way brings me the most comfort, because I know it will be fixed one day.
Comment Written 17-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2012
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So true, thank you
Comment from Janice Canerdy
Thoughts we sometimes deem morbid are often just natural--brought on by an event in life, in this case the death of a close family member. This is very good.
typo close to bottom--"curtail call"
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2012
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Thoughts we sometimes deem morbid are often just natural--brought on by an event in life, in this case the death of a close family member. This is very good.
typo close to bottom--"curtail call"
Comment Written 17-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2012
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Thank u and many blessings
Comment from Carole Rosa
Joannr, Amazing! Great imagination. But I bet it's thoughts that every person has back in their mind! I know I do. I'm 69 years old. My parents and siblings have passed. I'm divorced and a few of my very close friends have passed. I have one daughter in worse health than me and one daughter who has no friends!! Who will attend my funeral. Deep thinking!! Good and well written story. Carole
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2012
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Joannr, Amazing! Great imagination. But I bet it's thoughts that every person has back in their mind! I know I do. I'm 69 years old. My parents and siblings have passed. I'm divorced and a few of my very close friends have passed. I have one daughter in worse health than me and one daughter who has no friends!! Who will attend my funeral. Deep thinking!! Good and well written story. Carole
Comment Written 17-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2012
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Bless u
Comment from Anthony Crosbie
I found this very easy to read due to its flow and natural style. You described the funeral scene so well that i had no trouble visualising it. This is the standard and style i hope to eventually get to. Very well done.
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2012
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I found this very easy to read due to its flow and natural style. You described the funeral scene so well that i had no trouble visualising it. This is the standard and style i hope to eventually get to. Very well done.
Comment Written 17-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2012
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Writing is so personal ,you probably are at a higher level and do not realize it, thank u and God Bless.
Comment from wan890
This is beautifully written (only one typo I could spot). Your writing flows very well and is easy to read. I enjoyed your take on the funeral (staged theatrics) and I agree with it. Describing death as a "luxurious rest" was genius!
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2012
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This is beautifully written (only one typo I could spot). Your writing flows very well and is easy to read. I enjoyed your take on the funeral (staged theatrics) and I agree with it. Describing death as a "luxurious rest" was genius!
Comment Written 17-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2012
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Thank you and God Bless
Comment from LAFraser
Very good writing. I have enjoyed this piece very much. It is a good question for an eight year old. I wasn't a Barbie girl, either. I was too busy working in the field, tending to the animals, or running barefoot through the woods to the fishing hole. ;D
Thank you for posting.
Blessings,
~Eilish
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2012
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Very good writing. I have enjoyed this piece very much. It is a good question for an eight year old. I wasn't a Barbie girl, either. I was too busy working in the field, tending to the animals, or running barefoot through the woods to the fishing hole. ;D
Thank you for posting.
Blessings,
~Eilish
Comment Written 17-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2012
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I wish I was doing those thing then, maybe even now thanks again, u r to kind
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I enjoyed your story. It was well written and a joy to read. :)
Comment from Janie King
Those are big quetions for an adult muchless a child..but it's easy enough to see how it can happen..this is well-written and goves ne a lot to think about. God bless.
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2012
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Those are big quetions for an adult muchless a child..but it's easy enough to see how it can happen..this is well-written and goves ne a lot to think about. God bless.
Comment Written 17-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 17-Mar-2012
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Thank u and many blessings
Comment from WLHall
Very good question for an eight year old. Most of us put off thinking of death as something we'll get to later, when we're much, much older. But there is no guarantee what middle age is. Someone who dies at age eight, they were middle aged at four. This piece of writing is a wake-up call to many who don't think of themselves as dying anytime soon. You never know. And if you want something special for your funeral, speak up now if that's what you want. This was well written and to the point, enjoyed the read and made me think.
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2012
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Very good question for an eight year old. Most of us put off thinking of death as something we'll get to later, when we're much, much older. But there is no guarantee what middle age is. Someone who dies at age eight, they were middle aged at four. This piece of writing is a wake-up call to many who don't think of themselves as dying anytime soon. You never know. And if you want something special for your funeral, speak up now if that's what you want. This was well written and to the point, enjoyed the read and made me think.
Comment Written 16-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2012
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These days with recycling and the cost of a funeral, i'm getting cremated, lol
Comment from rjuselius
the game into a profound question. i like your story and i like the ending. the last line is on everyone's list of questions without an answer.
thank you for sharing!
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2012
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the game into a profound question. i like your story and i like the ending. the last line is on everyone's list of questions without an answer.
thank you for sharing!
Comment Written 16-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2012
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I just added things hope u can check out the new version a rating is not necessary thank you blessings.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
You have written an interesting post and it causes the reader to reflect. Unfortunately, there are many mechanical errors.
I think in the Title you meant to leave a space, My Funeral
It was , Who will come to my funeral.? (spacing issue with the first comma, and I am not sure why you have a period and a question mark at the end. You only need the question mark.)
When she died it seemed the most natural thing that should happen to her. This lessened the fear of dying for me , because it appeared to be the luxurious rest life had to offer someone like her . (comma after died, and spacing issue with the comma after me and the ending period.)
Grandma's hair was combed and set, she was wearing her jewelry , a new dress and shoes. Passive you need to change it to active, she wore her jewelry, a new dress, and shoes)
Sitting there watching the mourners made me wonder with great earnest, "Who will attend my funeral?" (Great Ernest, I am guessing there should be an Uncle)
Who will send the largest bouquet of my favorite amber colored roses,? (only the question mark)
Who will cry the most, ? (same only the ?
Who will sit in the back chewing gum and talk loud.? (same)
Surely the one who loved me the most will style my hair, paint my nails pale pink and be the one to bid me farewell before closing the coffin lid.
These questions frustrated my tiny brain and inevitably led me to the other fascinating question, "How will I die.?" (same)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2012
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You have written an interesting post and it causes the reader to reflect. Unfortunately, there are many mechanical errors.
I think in the Title you meant to leave a space, My Funeral
It was , Who will come to my funeral.? (spacing issue with the first comma, and I am not sure why you have a period and a question mark at the end. You only need the question mark.)
When she died it seemed the most natural thing that should happen to her. This lessened the fear of dying for me , because it appeared to be the luxurious rest life had to offer someone like her . (comma after died, and spacing issue with the comma after me and the ending period.)
Grandma's hair was combed and set, she was wearing her jewelry , a new dress and shoes. Passive you need to change it to active, she wore her jewelry, a new dress, and shoes)
Sitting there watching the mourners made me wonder with great earnest, "Who will attend my funeral?" (Great Ernest, I am guessing there should be an Uncle)
Who will send the largest bouquet of my favorite amber colored roses,? (only the question mark)
Who will cry the most, ? (same only the ?
Who will sit in the back chewing gum and talk loud.? (same)
Surely the one who loved me the most will style my hair, paint my nails pale pink and be the one to bid me farewell before closing the coffin lid.
These questions frustrated my tiny brain and inevitably led me to the other fascinating question, "How will I die.?" (same)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 16-Mar-2012
reply by the author on 16-Mar-2012
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If you were hear id hug and kiss you u have helped me so much God cannot bless you enough for me.
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thank you, if you make the corrections let me know and I will up the rating.
