The Heir Apparent
Viewing comments for Chapter 9 "A Plea Bargain"A family learns their father is a serial killer
24 total reviews
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
How this family must be traumatised.
It's not doing them good to stay locked up
in four walls.. it will do them all
good to get outside for some fresh air.
I promise we'll be fine.(")
(")I know, Mom, I'm worried about her too.(")
Margaret
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2012
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How this family must be traumatised.
It's not doing them good to stay locked up
in four walls.. it will do them all
good to get outside for some fresh air.
I promise we'll be fine.(")
(")I know, Mom, I'm worried about her too.(")
Margaret
Comment Written 16-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2012
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Thank you for catching the spags. I am so pleased you continue to enjoy this.
Comment from Cranial Thinker
This is so very interesting the way all the emotions are bouncing around like crazy a real sociologist internship
if you will,watching them handling the unimaginable pain
of guilt for something they had no active knowledge of
and desiring to be able to offer something to the poor effected families,but knowing their faces would do nothing
in the neighhood of consoling any of the families has literally placed them all as complete social undesirables
and for like of a better words, placed on the list for trophy hunters of extreme haters....This is a most wonderful write my friend,I am so enjoying this so very much....Cranial Thinker
hunters
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2012
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This is so very interesting the way all the emotions are bouncing around like crazy a real sociologist internship
if you will,watching them handling the unimaginable pain
of guilt for something they had no active knowledge of
and desiring to be able to offer something to the poor effected families,but knowing their faces would do nothing
in the neighhood of consoling any of the families has literally placed them all as complete social undesirables
and for like of a better words, placed on the list for trophy hunters of extreme haters....This is a most wonderful write my friend,I am so enjoying this so very much....Cranial Thinker
hunters
Comment Written 16-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2012
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It is so sad how people feel the need to punish those that had nothing to do with hurting them.
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I know and strange as it might sound to say;that is truly not a natural behavior of real humans as our natural inclination is to seek out the viable truth of all matters....Cranial Thinker
Comment from cheyennewy
Hi Smurph,
This is a great chapter and I know I read every word without skimming over some lines as I so often have to do. What this family is going through is unimaginable and I can't even believe the pain they feel. Thank heavens for James as he has a good good head on his shoulders and is bound to protect his family. I worry about Charlie who has a temper that gets out of control and hope he hasn't inherited the gene for violence. I can't wait to see what happens next. Bravo...blessings, chey
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2012
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Hi Smurph,
This is a great chapter and I know I read every word without skimming over some lines as I so often have to do. What this family is going through is unimaginable and I can't even believe the pain they feel. Thank heavens for James as he has a good good head on his shoulders and is bound to protect his family. I worry about Charlie who has a temper that gets out of control and hope he hasn't inherited the gene for violence. I can't wait to see what happens next. Bravo...blessings, chey
Comment Written 16-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2012
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Thank you. I am thrilled you continue to enjoy this.
Comment from Joan E.
I remembered and once again admired James' unflattering description of his father's "overgrown ego" and Mom's leaving her June Cleaver role behind. I think you added more detail about James' fortunately being distracted by school. -Joan
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2012
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I remembered and once again admired James' unflattering description of his father's "overgrown ego" and Mom's leaving her June Cleaver role behind. I think you added more detail about James' fortunately being distracted by school. -Joan
Comment Written 16-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2012
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Yes, this is very close to the previous version. The next chapter will have more changes. I am pleased you continue to enjoy this.
Comment from Janie King
signed and then ...I think it's sighed...One might go stare crazy after a while but I can assure you I wouldn't go out for any reason..they be taking me to another state...I would be so devastated that I couldn't bear to face anyone. Good bless.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2012
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signed and then ...I think it's sighed...One might go stare crazy after a while but I can assure you I wouldn't go out for any reason..they be taking me to another state...I would be so devastated that I couldn't bear to face anyone. Good bless.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2012
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Many families break up, move away and some turn on each other. It is a very sad situation for all of them.
Comment from Roberta Joan Jensen
I covered him with a blanket [and] then poured myself a glass
house like a pompous ass[,] convinced everyone was envious of him.
However, over the past few years[,] Dad had become noticeably paranoid, driving a wedge between them.
and access to a fully equipped exercise facility had worn of[f].
I realized this was the first time she had shown any emotion[,] other than anger or sadness[,] since Dad's arrest.
She wiped her face with the washcloth and[,] with a forced smile, patted me affectionately on the knee.
Mom signed[sighed] and then shook her head.
Mom's voice t[r]ailed off briefly.
"I can say with absolute certainty[no comma in place of "that"] I hate the man sitting
to foot[,] shadow boxing,
continues to be excellent. You are describing their pain with compassion and understanding.
Roberta
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2012
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I covered him with a blanket [and] then poured myself a glass
house like a pompous ass[,] convinced everyone was envious of him.
However, over the past few years[,] Dad had become noticeably paranoid, driving a wedge between them.
and access to a fully equipped exercise facility had worn of[f].
I realized this was the first time she had shown any emotion[,] other than anger or sadness[,] since Dad's arrest.
She wiped her face with the washcloth and[,] with a forced smile, patted me affectionately on the knee.
Mom signed[sighed] and then shook her head.
Mom's voice t[r]ailed off briefly.
"I can say with absolute certainty[no comma in place of "that"] I hate the man sitting
to foot[,] shadow boxing,
continues to be excellent. You are describing their pain with compassion and understanding.
Roberta
Comment Written 15-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2012
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Thanks for catching the spags and for the suggestions. I sincerely appreciate it. I am pleased you liked this chapter.
Comment from RebelRose
What happened in the author's notes? They are all messd up.
It is amazing the insight James has when it comes to his father. It is such a pity the rest of the family turns a blind eye to all his faults and mean ways. Even now, they don't want to see it.
I enjoyed this chapter.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2012
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What happened in the author's notes? They are all messd up.
It is amazing the insight James has when it comes to his father. It is such a pity the rest of the family turns a blind eye to all his faults and mean ways. Even now, they don't want to see it.
I enjoyed this chapter.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2012
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It took years of grooming for the father to achieve the results he wanted. I'll check out the author's notes.
Comment from CHarte
Now I am all caught up. It's nice to see Mom coming out of her haze. She needs to be strong for her children.
i did find a few typo's in this chapter, that I have noted below.
I, on the other hand, I had few friends. - I would remove the second I in this sentence. It tends to snag the reader.
The thought of dad being executed was too unreal for me (t)o imagine.
I only know it is wrong to use t( )hose poor girls that way.
Collette
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2012
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Now I am all caught up. It's nice to see Mom coming out of her haze. She needs to be strong for her children.
i did find a few typo's in this chapter, that I have noted below.
I, on the other hand, I had few friends. - I would remove the second I in this sentence. It tends to snag the reader.
The thought of dad being executed was too unreal for me (t)o imagine.
I only know it is wrong to use t( )hose poor girls that way.
Collette
Comment Written 15-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2012
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You have a great eye, I caught all of them except the second I. Yes, Mom has to get her act together for the family. Glad you liked this one.
Comment from Belinda
Hi, Sasha, I'm 'glad' with the development of Mom. And now I understand Dad's bargain better than the last time when I read your former version. Still following you eagerly...:)
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2012
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Hi, Sasha, I'm 'glad' with the development of Mom. And now I understand Dad's bargain better than the last time when I read your former version. Still following you eagerly...:)
Comment Written 15-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2012
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The confusion is understandable. The laws are different in each state and separated by local and federal jurisdiction. We get confused too. Glad this time I made it clearer.
Comment from jimbo starr
'It was as though they needed to acknowledge his inflated idea of his own importance by constantly seeking his approval to validate their existence.'Love this'( addicts of all). Your total story relates to many a household that has this type of father( apart from the killing) and will hold the reader to feel someone must be saved in this family or at least escape. (Poor James) This leaves so much leeway and space for you to pull us in even more. Great work with a few typo's( o,(to) pated,?) but hey, terrific.
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2012
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'It was as though they needed to acknowledge his inflated idea of his own importance by constantly seeking his approval to validate their existence.'Love this'( addicts of all). Your total story relates to many a household that has this type of father( apart from the killing) and will hold the reader to feel someone must be saved in this family or at least escape. (Poor James) This leaves so much leeway and space for you to pull us in even more. Great work with a few typo's( o,(to) pated,?) but hey, terrific.
Comment Written 15-Feb-2012
reply by the author on 15-Feb-2012
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You caught me in the middle of correcting the typos. I am so pleased you like this and think there is space to pull you in deeper.