The Red Dress
Viewing comments for Chapter 12 "The Red dress chapter twelve."The story of a teenage girl
15 total reviews
Comment from MumEsGirl
Great work. I can identify with Lisa and her reaction to a 'normal' family. It was one of the problems I encountered when I got married.
Cant wait to see waht the mother wants this time, but at least with the father there, I am hoping for something a little less agressive
kate
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2012
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Great work. I can identify with Lisa and her reaction to a 'normal' family. It was one of the problems I encountered when I got married.
Cant wait to see waht the mother wants this time, but at least with the father there, I am hoping for something a little less agressive
kate
Comment Written 22-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2012
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If you don't like aggressive, you won't like chapter fourteen (even made me cringe!) Thank you so much for your review and support. Alexis x
Comment from robina1978
Lisa fits in so well with his family and they are drawn to her as well. Already suspecting her feelings I thought. Then Alan and she in the car to London and it all falls together , they love each other and want to get married. But then Lisa´s mother again and what will she do now=
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2012
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Lisa fits in so well with his family and they are drawn to her as well. Already suspecting her feelings I thought. Then Alan and she in the car to London and it all falls together , they love each other and want to get married. But then Lisa´s mother again and what will she do now=
Comment Written 22-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2012
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Sadly (or otherwise!) we have another twenty five chapters to find out. By then Lisa's mother is the least of her worries! Alexis x
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Yes might be true.
Comment from dhee khaye
Cool! Excellent! I am interested to read all the chapter of your story. Your title is very interesting, The image background is so cool. Keep up the great work. I am looking forward to become your friend.
Regards,
dhee khaye
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2012
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Cool! Excellent! I am interested to read all the chapter of your story. Your title is very interesting, The image background is so cool. Keep up the great work. I am looking forward to become your friend.
Regards,
dhee khaye
Comment Written 22-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2012
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I'm so glad you enjoyed it. I would be honoured if you wanted to read more. Alexis x
Comment from AlexAX
Wow Alexis, you have left my heart racing with excitement, just wanting to know what is going to happen next, the build up in your story is superb! Such an intense feeling of love shines clearly through for Alan and Lisa. I love the car part with the fogged up window lol. Just a few things I noticed .. You need a gap between "you've fallen" in first line, "formally adopted intothe family" space between into and the, and him.Now, needs a space too. "decently
Walk, without breaking into a run." The sentence broke for no reason to next line and you have a capital on walk. Well done! Alex :)
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reply by the author on 22-Jan-2012
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Wow Alexis, you have left my heart racing with excitement, just wanting to know what is going to happen next, the build up in your story is superb! Such an intense feeling of love shines clearly through for Alan and Lisa. I love the car part with the fogged up window lol. Just a few things I noticed .. You need a gap between "you've fallen" in first line, "formally adopted intothe family" space between into and the, and him.Now, needs a space too. "decently
Walk, without breaking into a run." The sentence broke for no reason to next line and you have a capital on walk. Well done! Alex :)
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Comment Written 22-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2012
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Thank you! Yes, I noticed those the minute I read it after I posted the chapter. For some reason my computer is not speaking the same language as the advanced editor today! It looks perfect in the box, but when it's posted, it's got a mind of it's own! I think you'll enjoy the next chapter, which should be up within half an hour... computer allowing! Alexis x
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Haha yes computers do that sometimes I have found out too lol Lets hope so :)
Comment from Sarah_Goldwell
This is a very well written chapter. Although I have not read any of the previous, your opening paragraph drew me in and I found it easy to identify with the characters. The dialogue is good and flows naturally and you have very good use of imagery and description. The artwork is beautiful, it really compliments the words.
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reply by the author on 22-Jan-2012
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This is a very well written chapter. Although I have not read any of the previous, your opening paragraph drew me in and I found it easy to identify with the characters. The dialogue is good and flows naturally and you have very good use of imagery and description. The artwork is beautiful, it really compliments the words.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2012
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2012
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Thank you so much, I really appreciate your lovely review. Alexis x