I Put Them Back, She Takes Them Out
Tri, Tri and Tri again ...61 total reviews
Comment from missy98writer
CPJ,
You're a cheeky writer, my friend. Your triple triolet threat is terrifically written with fun imagery painting a picture in this readers head. The art work you used is priceless. The body of your poem fits a Triolet nicely and your syllable count is spot-on. In your Triolet poem you used great rhymes, excellent use of alliteration, effective metaphor and very good descriptive writing. I liked your repeating refrain. I enjoyed your second Triolet the best: "I mop it up, but she's devout And flings the juice from there to here She touts the pour and pulls the pout I wipe it up, but she's devout Will drain her teapot via spout Each drop enhancing wet veneer I soak it up, but she's devout In spreading mess from there to here." Thanks for making my Monday bright. I'd recommend your terrific Triolet trio to other reviewers as a 'must' read got a riotous time. I wish you good luck in Triple Triolet Task contest. Keep on rocking the fabulously funny writing, my friend. I bet you win this contest. I personally freak out when I think of trying a triolet because mind would go in the toilet. How's it hanging in your part of the globe? Have a superb day. Peace out...Melissa.
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2011
  |
CPJ,
You're a cheeky writer, my friend. Your triple triolet threat is terrifically written with fun imagery painting a picture in this readers head. The art work you used is priceless. The body of your poem fits a Triolet nicely and your syllable count is spot-on. In your Triolet poem you used great rhymes, excellent use of alliteration, effective metaphor and very good descriptive writing. I liked your repeating refrain. I enjoyed your second Triolet the best: "I mop it up, but she's devout And flings the juice from there to here She touts the pour and pulls the pout I wipe it up, but she's devout Will drain her teapot via spout Each drop enhancing wet veneer I soak it up, but she's devout In spreading mess from there to here." Thanks for making my Monday bright. I'd recommend your terrific Triolet trio to other reviewers as a 'must' read got a riotous time. I wish you good luck in Triple Triolet Task contest. Keep on rocking the fabulously funny writing, my friend. I bet you win this contest. I personally freak out when I think of trying a triolet because mind would go in the toilet. How's it hanging in your part of the globe? Have a superb day. Peace out...Melissa.
Comment Written 28-Nov-2011
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2011
-
Haha from one cheeky broad to another, thanks a bunch missy. Really appreciate your kind wishes and review.
Cheers CPJ xo
Comment from adewpearl
Phillipa, what a fun read LOL
This is one you and your daughter will share many laughs over when she is a young lady with neater habits ;-)
Strong rhymes
good steady cadence that sounds great when read aloud
excellent uses of alliteration like in pour and pulls the pout
Fantastic humor
as you make each scene so easy to visualize in all its messy glory
Your modifications all work well, too
Each triolet stands alone, but together, they just get funnier and funnier :-) Brooke
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2011
|
Phillipa, what a fun read LOL
This is one you and your daughter will share many laughs over when she is a young lady with neater habits ;-)
Strong rhymes
good steady cadence that sounds great when read aloud
excellent uses of alliteration like in pour and pulls the pout
Fantastic humor
as you make each scene so easy to visualize in all its messy glory
Your modifications all work well, too
Each triolet stands alone, but together, they just get funnier and funnier :-) Brooke
Comment Written 28-Nov-2011
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2011
-
Thanks Brooke. I appreciate always your thorough and very thoughtful reviews and comments.
Cheers Phillippa xoxo
Comment from vickib
SUPER CUTE!!!! And wow I'm so jealous of how amazing a rhyme-r you are too. She is adorable. I used to just vaccum up Taylor's little Barbie things. LOL! LOVED this wonderful entry. XO
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2011
 |
SUPER CUTE!!!! And wow I'm so jealous of how amazing a rhyme-r you are too. She is adorable. I used to just vaccum up Taylor's little Barbie things. LOL! LOVED this wonderful entry. XO
Comment Written 28-Nov-2011
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2011
-
Wow thanks so much friend, I really appreciate your delightful sixer review and comments. I have swept up a few of those bits you speak of. Hahaha
I told my five year old, it its on the floor its fair game for vaccum and broom...you should see him rally round when I turn the vacuum on.
Cheers and thanks again.
Phillippa xo
Comment from Quire's Gal
This is absolutely charming!! I was blown away by how your lines flow so smoothly from one to the other. Very natural sounding. I'm still having a little trouble with mine and reading other people's entries is how I best learn. I've learned a lot from this piece so I gave you the six stars
Love your unique topic and best wishes in the contest and with your two-yr. old. I'm a retired teacher and I feel your pain! LOL!
BTW, how do you spell your first name?...Phillipe? Let me know.
Cheers,
Katherine.
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2011
|
This is absolutely charming!! I was blown away by how your lines flow so smoothly from one to the other. Very natural sounding. I'm still having a little trouble with mine and reading other people's entries is how I best learn. I've learned a lot from this piece so I gave you the six stars
Love your unique topic and best wishes in the contest and with your two-yr. old. I'm a retired teacher and I feel your pain! LOL!
BTW, how do you spell your first name?...Phillipe? Let me know.
Cheers,
Katherine.
Comment Written 28-Nov-2011
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2011
-
Wow thanks so much my friend and I appreciate the delightful review and so supportive. I am glad you enjoyed it and I look forward to reading and reviewing your entry.
cheers Phillippa x
Comment from lekhani
Good . Interesting read and the chaos is very well depicted . I particularly liked the line ' untidyness is her career' and the ending is good ' and so the endless roundabout ' which conveys the continuity.
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2011
|
Good . Interesting read and the chaos is very well depicted . I particularly liked the line ' untidyness is her career' and the ending is good ' and so the endless roundabout ' which conveys the continuity.
Comment Written 28-Nov-2011
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2011
-
Many thanks, glad you enjoyed.
Cheers closet
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
Now that my son is 30 and no longer at home, I can laugh about this, but he was the messiest kid around. Even as a teenager, he would leave a trail of junk as he walked through the house. Your triolets are well written, and the poem quite enjoyable. Good luck with the contest and the crap!!! Debbie
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2011
|
Now that my son is 30 and no longer at home, I can laugh about this, but he was the messiest kid around. Even as a teenager, he would leave a trail of junk as he walked through the house. Your triolets are well written, and the poem quite enjoyable. Good luck with the contest and the crap!!! Debbie
Comment Written 28-Nov-2011
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2011
-
Many thanks Debbie, I appreciate your thoughtful review.
Cheers closet
Comment from RKagan
LOL would you believe me if I told you that someday you will miss this? My daughter is all grown up now and I miss those wonderful days when she made an absoulte mess of my house. We are still best friends, but she is now my grown up friend. God Bless you and your little one. Enjoy her.
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2011
|
LOL would you believe me if I told you that someday you will miss this? My daughter is all grown up now and I miss those wonderful days when she made an absoulte mess of my house. We are still best friends, but she is now my grown up friend. God Bless you and your little one. Enjoy her.
Comment Written 28-Nov-2011
reply by the author on 01-Dec-2011
-
Yes I believe you Roberta.
Many thanks for the delightful review and reminder that it wont be forever and I will miss it like crazy.
Cheers Phillippa xo
Comment from Judian James
It sounds to me, Missy, that you don't have time for this frivilous nonsence of writing poetry with Talia about!! What a darling picture for such a little hellion! HA!
My youngest grandson, Sawyer, is just like her ... always busy and into everything CONSTANTLY! Kids with this kind of energy don't outgrow it ... I'm just sayin' ... I LOVED this one about a very small slice of your life (considering the size of the pie she creates by the end of a day!)
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2011
|
It sounds to me, Missy, that you don't have time for this frivilous nonsence of writing poetry with Talia about!! What a darling picture for such a little hellion! HA!
My youngest grandson, Sawyer, is just like her ... always busy and into everything CONSTANTLY! Kids with this kind of energy don't outgrow it ... I'm just sayin' ... I LOVED this one about a very small slice of your life (considering the size of the pie she creates by the end of a day!)
Comment Written 28-Nov-2011
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2011
-
Thanks mate. She is SUCH a little shit at the moment...we did not have the Terrible Twos with Jackson so Tahlia darlia is making up for it...Sawyer sounds like a little sweety too! Haha
Thanks for a sterling review.
Clo xoxo
PS Yes there is a fookin lot of pie to clean up at the end of the day if I don't do it 5 times during the fookin day.
My time wasn't my own before...but this is goddamned ridiculous.
Drastic measures are being enforced as of tomorrow.
Not sure what they'll be but they'll be fookin drastic.
Talk soon x
-
Sorry I spelled Tahlia wrong. I was feeling so clever I remembered her name ... damn!
-
I didn't notice sweets.
x
Its okay.
Comment from Deejharrington
I wish you the best of luck in the contest. Loved the picture, that is quite a smile! I think she's got your number. How I remember those days. I eventually just closed my son's bedroom door and pretended it didn't exist! Good luck and remember, this too will pass.
deb
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2011
|
I wish you the best of luck in the contest. Loved the picture, that is quite a smile! I think she's got your number. How I remember those days. I eventually just closed my son's bedroom door and pretended it didn't exist! Good luck and remember, this too will pass.
deb
Comment Written 28-Nov-2011
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2011
-
Oh she has my number deb LOL...I think she is a chip of the old block too...i am not the worlds tidiest mummy but I do endeavour to keep a reasonably tidy house. It just chews up a lot of time picking up the same things 5 times a day.
Thanks for the great advice...but I would need to close every door here. LOL Perhaps I should start by closing a few more doors. Thanks for a great review.
Cheers closet xo
-
you are welcome and best of luck!
deb
Comment from Piggies Grandma
I enjoyed reading your poem very much closet, and I understand where you're coming from. My daughter is 14 and you should see her bedroom. Your poem is cleverly written.
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2011
|
I enjoyed reading your poem very much closet, and I understand where you're coming from. My daughter is 14 and you should see her bedroom. Your poem is cleverly written.
Comment Written 28-Nov-2011
reply by the author on 28-Nov-2011
-
Thanks PG I appreciate your support...14 huh? hmmm I have all that to look forward to. Better get a handle on it now! LOL
Cheers and thanks for your thoughtful review as always.
Closet xo