Reflections For The New Day
Viewing comments for Chapter 66 "One Day"23 total reviews
Comment from cheyennewy
Hi Jewell,
This is lovely poem that is steeped with melancholy. Before I forget in your 4th verse you should change "&" to "and." Not good to use an ampersand when writing poetry. That said I love everything about this piece. From the well chosen words, fluid flow and theme. Well done. Blessings, chey
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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Hi Jewell,
This is lovely poem that is steeped with melancholy. Before I forget in your 4th verse you should change "&" to "and." Not good to use an ampersand when writing poetry. That said I love everything about this piece. From the well chosen words, fluid flow and theme. Well done. Blessings, chey
Comment Written 03-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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Thank you! I didn't even realize I used that! Appreciate it!
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smile
Comment from Wendyanne
Wow what a fascinating, thought-provoking piece of free verse poetry you have pened jewell. Yuo have certainly been doing some contemplation of the future. Well done
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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Wow what a fascinating, thought-provoking piece of free verse poetry you have pened jewell. Yuo have certainly been doing some contemplation of the future. Well done
Comment Written 03-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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It's all the time with the elderly who are suffering, I supposd.
Add to that, hearing that my son's girlfriend passed after hanging herse last evening. We are rather melancholy ....
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I am so sorry for your loss Jewell. My little brother hung himself so I know how devestating it is for those left to pick up the pieces. Hugs xx
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Aww :(
We gotta start a LIGHT CLUB now!
This is too depressing!
Comment from KathyH
Beautifully written. This poem has a lively lyrical quality. It has a sadness and wistful ness that pulls the reader along. Great closing stanza as well. Well done
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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Beautifully written. This poem has a lively lyrical quality. It has a sadness and wistful ness that pulls the reader along. Great closing stanza as well. Well done
Comment Written 03-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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Thanks K
Comment from Jean Lutz
Art and words sing in harmony. For one who is at the age when some of the senses are becoming weaker I believe there is a spiritual sense that is growing stronger. One small speck in your perfection -- caress not carress.
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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Art and words sing in harmony. For one who is at the age when some of the senses are becoming weaker I believe there is a spiritual sense that is growing stronger. One small speck in your perfection -- caress not carress.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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Thanks so much! I'll fix that blooper.
Comment from Ronni
This is a deeply introspecitive contemplation on "One Day"
when it is all over! A soul-searching and heart-stirring
probe into what we hope will be a fullfilled legacy of
our lives and fullfillments beyond.
Emotions and feelings , anticipations, love and lovingness
of deepest ardor, physical and spiritual, abound in this
poem ever so profoundly, envisioning past, present and
future transitions from life, living and departing.
A most thought provoking and soul-tripping read indeed.
P.S.(I wondered if the text might could be a bit brighter,
found it very difficult to see against that dark of
a background...maybe it's just my eyes or computer..
LO!!!! otherwise nothing else is lacking!) Except
the courage to read it again...LO...What impact!!!!
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
 |
This is a deeply introspecitive contemplation on "One Day"
when it is all over! A soul-searching and heart-stirring
probe into what we hope will be a fullfilled legacy of
our lives and fullfillments beyond.
Emotions and feelings , anticipations, love and lovingness
of deepest ardor, physical and spiritual, abound in this
poem ever so profoundly, envisioning past, present and
future transitions from life, living and departing.
A most thought provoking and soul-tripping read indeed.
P.S.(I wondered if the text might could be a bit brighter,
found it very difficult to see against that dark of
a background...maybe it's just my eyes or computer..
LO!!!! otherwise nothing else is lacking!) Except
the courage to read it again...LO...What impact!!!!
Comment Written 03-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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I humbly accept! Thank you so much. :)
Thanks Ronni. This was a strange experience to write...
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Please...don't ever tell me it is a 'no sixer!'...just accept
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Please...don't ever tell me it is a 'no sixer!'...just accept
Comment from Kingsland
I remember your voice very well. You have a beautiful singing voice. I enjoyed this excellent poetic presentation that has a spirit and a poetic voice for always moving forward until you can move no more.... John
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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I remember your voice very well. You have a beautiful singing voice. I enjoyed this excellent poetic presentation that has a spirit and a poetic voice for always moving forward until you can move no more.... John
Comment Written 03-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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Thank you, John :)
Comment from Cletus Hardiman
Honey, this poem is a beautiful thing, that I bet was written right out of the heart. We are allotted a "certain" amount of time on this earth, and then it is all over for us. It is what we do with this time that matters. Reach down into my material that is not up in the listing and read "Time" and "Father Time." Thanks for this beautiful poem and the truth that is in it! Clete
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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Honey, this poem is a beautiful thing, that I bet was written right out of the heart. We are allotted a "certain" amount of time on this earth, and then it is all over for us. It is what we do with this time that matters. Reach down into my material that is not up in the listing and read "Time" and "Father Time." Thanks for this beautiful poem and the truth that is in it! Clete
Comment Written 03-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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Thanks so much, Clete! :)
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You are welcome!!!!!!!!!!! Clete
Comment from Laurie Clayton
This simply speaks of one who
is contemplating their time of passing,
and the journey that will take them there,
with the slow deterioration of everyday
function, to nothing but spirit.
And then you raise them out of this contemplation
and give them all the thing they will do before that starts to happen.
Excellent descriptive writing, full of emotion and vivid imagery.
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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This simply speaks of one who
is contemplating their time of passing,
and the journey that will take them there,
with the slow deterioration of everyday
function, to nothing but spirit.
And then you raise them out of this contemplation
and give them all the thing they will do before that starts to happen.
Excellent descriptive writing, full of emotion and vivid imagery.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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Indeed. Thanks Laurie.
Comment from kiwisteveh
Hey, this is great - I don't think I've read anything of yours before, but I am impressed.
You cascade the dread of future helplessness and then surprise with the positive affirmation at the end - I enjoyed your description of the 'functions' of each part and then the spectactular declaration.
Well done.
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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Hey, this is great - I don't think I've read anything of yours before, but I am impressed.
You cascade the dread of future helplessness and then surprise with the positive affirmation at the end - I enjoyed your description of the 'functions' of each part and then the spectactular declaration.
Well done.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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Thanks kiwi...
Comment from LKM2009
Nice poem. "This spirit will rise to leave it's legacy of living truth and glory." I really enjoyed that line. Good overall flow to your poem.
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reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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Nice poem. "This spirit will rise to leave it's legacy of living truth and glory." I really enjoyed that line. Good overall flow to your poem.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 03-Apr-2011
reply by the author on 03-Apr-2011
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Thanks!