Flash Fiction
Viewing comments for Chapter 24 "Hope Reborn"Collection of Flash, Micro, etc.
31 total reviews
Comment from c_lucas
All is not lost if one has a hold on reality. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for an easy read. There is very good imagery and descriptive scheme.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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All is not lost if one has a hold on reality. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for an easy read. There is very good imagery and descriptive scheme.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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Charlie,
Reality gets a little too real at times..I feel like I am living and breathing a nightmare..hoping the movie ends soon. Smiles, CArol
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You're welocme Carol. Charlie
Comment from missy98writer
Carol,
your story "Hope Reborn' is very well written for micro-fiction. You have conflict and resolution. Excellent imagery, great narrative, and natural dialogue. Her are some examples of your descriptive writing:
Staring into the pitch-black water, he prepared to die. Yet, something beckoned him to stay. His eyes flickered. Leaning forward, he looked again.
Brilliant red hair and eyes of green ... the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen, diving beneath the water, only to surface again.
His eyes open, amazed at her fiery red hair.
Hope was reborn.
It was a delight to read your micro-fiction. I know writing in under so many words is hard to do and have a semblance of a story. You are a talented writer, my dear. . .Melissa.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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Carol,
your story "Hope Reborn' is very well written for micro-fiction. You have conflict and resolution. Excellent imagery, great narrative, and natural dialogue. Her are some examples of your descriptive writing:
Staring into the pitch-black water, he prepared to die. Yet, something beckoned him to stay. His eyes flickered. Leaning forward, he looked again.
Brilliant red hair and eyes of green ... the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen, diving beneath the water, only to surface again.
His eyes open, amazed at her fiery red hair.
Hope was reborn.
It was a delight to read your micro-fiction. I know writing in under so many words is hard to do and have a semblance of a story. You are a talented writer, my dear. . .Melissa.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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Melissa,
Sorry for being so far behind...had to steal a few minutes this morning to thank everyone. I truly appreciate your encouragement and constant support. Smiles, Carol
Comment from RKagan
This was interesting. I liked the other one better, but this was good. I liked the mermaid concept, and the surprise ending.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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This was interesting. I liked the other one better, but this was good. I liked the mermaid concept, and the surprise ending.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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RKagan,
Thank you for your kind review. Smiles, Carol
Comment from Gert sherwood
Hi Carol, I have a question what happened to you writing your long stories?
Looks like you are now into writing flash fictions
This flash fiction gave me a strange chill
But I must say your work is real good.
Gert
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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Hi Carol, I have a question what happened to you writing your long stories?
Looks like you are now into writing flash fictions
This flash fiction gave me a strange chill
But I must say your work is real good.
Gert
Comment Written 19-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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Gert,
Sorry for being so far behind...had to steal a few minutes this morning to thank everyone. I truly appreciate your encouragement and constant support. Smiles, Carol
Comment from jadapenn
Are you into the shorts, Smiles. This was a good dream and then the nurse awoke him. Was he trying to commit suicide?
I liked the way you developed the girl with the fiery red hair. Good job.
Luv jada.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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Are you into the shorts, Smiles. This was a good dream and then the nurse awoke him. Was he trying to commit suicide?
I liked the way you developed the girl with the fiery red hair. Good job.
Luv jada.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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Jada,
Sorry for being so far behind...had to steal a few minutes this morning to thank everyone. I truly appreciate your encouragement and constant support. Smiles, Carol
Comment from patwannabe
Carol, this is a marvelous use of 110 words. You've said so much by saying so little. Every word is important and it's excellent. Wonder just what some of the thoughts are as we hover between two worlds.
Wonderful, pat
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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Carol, this is a marvelous use of 110 words. You've said so much by saying so little. Every word is important and it's excellent. Wonder just what some of the thoughts are as we hover between two worlds.
Wonderful, pat
Comment Written 19-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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Pat,
Sorry for being so far behind...had to steal a few minutes this morning to thank everyone. I truly appreciate your encouragement and constant support. Smiles, Carol
Comment from Halfree
I feel that the second paragraph is more powerful. With the second as first the second might begin "Below the waves..." It's a very good story or better still the introduction to a longer story. The writer has skill, for sure. This one needs a little more work.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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I feel that the second paragraph is more powerful. With the second as first the second might begin "Below the waves..." It's a very good story or better still the introduction to a longer story. The writer has skill, for sure. This one needs a little more work.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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Halfree,
Appreciate the time and suggestions..Smiles, Carol
Comment from vandawalker
Great short, short story. I like the description of the nurse with her fiery red hair. It brings everything together.
His eyes open,(opened)
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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Great short, short story. I like the description of the nurse with her fiery red hair. It brings everything together.
His eyes open,(opened)
Comment Written 19-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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Vandawalker,
Thanks again for continuing to read and support..I truly appreciate it. Smiles, Carp;
Comment from Sharesy
This was excellent, Carol. I like it a lot! I like the way you fooled the reader into thinking this was a story about suicide, then all resolves when he wakes up. There's also the added layer, where he actually did jump off the cliff, and was rescued. Nicely done. Good luck with your prompt.
Best regards,
sharesy
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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This was excellent, Carol. I like it a lot! I like the way you fooled the reader into thinking this was a story about suicide, then all resolves when he wakes up. There's also the added layer, where he actually did jump off the cliff, and was rescued. Nicely done. Good luck with your prompt.
Best regards,
sharesy
Comment Written 19-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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Sharesy,
If I kept you guessing, I did my job. glad you enjoyed. Smiles, CArol
Comment from RebelRose
You're on a roll, girl. Another good micro-fiction post. Great imagery and even though it was not a long story, it was easy to get the gist of it.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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You're on a roll, girl. Another good micro-fiction post. Great imagery and even though it was not a long story, it was easy to get the gist of it.
Comment Written 19-Jul-2010
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2010
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Patti,
Thank you for reading and enjoying. I appreciate it...Carol
