In Silence She Suffers
the abuse she hides from the world22 total reviews
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is very well written with good form, good flow, good meter, a good picture you chose to go with it, i think the feelings were very well written in this poem and you did a good job expressing them
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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this is very well written with good form, good flow, good meter, a good picture you chose to go with it, i think the feelings were very well written in this poem and you did a good job expressing them
Comment Written 06-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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I thank you so much sweetwoodjax for your kind comments and your lovely rating. Especially I thank you for taking the time read my work.
Comment from pearlecat
This is a brilliant piece. Especially the last two lines. Because that is exactly how they play it. And the last line is exactly what the results are. Well done. Pearl
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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This is a brilliant piece. Especially the last two lines. Because that is exactly how they play it. And the last line is exactly what the results are. Well done. Pearl
Comment Written 06-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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Dear Pearl - I am very honored that you have given me a rating of "6" for my poem. It's such a tragic subject, but one that I felt very strongly about. I want you to know how much I appreciate your taking your time to read my work and give me such a lovely review and rating!
Comment from zoocq
great form, imagery use and sentiment. A sadly moving story that is, as you say, so prevalent in our society. Abuse of women, children, pets...sad commentary on humans!
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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great form, imagery use and sentiment. A sadly moving story that is, as you say, so prevalent in our society. Abuse of women, children, pets...sad commentary on humans!
Comment Written 06-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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zoocq - I could not agree more - it definitely isn't just women, but the even more innocent children and animals (the ones who can't speak for themselves). I thank you so much for taking the time to read my work and for your very kind comments and rating.
Comment from Bellringer
Powerful poem showing the darkest side of humanity. A very well constructed poem. This is one sad poem that sticks to the mind, even after leaving the page. Your second to last line has ten syllables ("Bitch, look what you made me do," he screams"). I am not familiar with this style, but I imagine it should have contained only nine syllable.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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Powerful poem showing the darkest side of humanity. A very well constructed poem. This is one sad poem that sticks to the mind, even after leaving the page. Your second to last line has ten syllables ("Bitch, look what you made me do," he screams"). I am not familiar with this style, but I imagine it should have contained only nine syllable.
Comment Written 06-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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Thank you Bellringer, I count only nine syllables in that line? I very much appreciate your thoughtful comments regarding the poem - and yes, it truly is the darkest side of humanity. Bullys always "batter" someone they know is weaker and someone who they know they can get away with it. And, then blame the victim. Again, thanks for reading my work, it is most appreciated.
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You're right that line has nine. Thanks.
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Thanks for checking for me though - I sometimes look at something so much when I'm writing it, that it's so easy to mess up! :-)
Comment from Susanne M. Psyris
Great execution and meaningful content to the Etheree for the contest. The penultimate is hard to read and not choke up when one has suffered at the cruel hands of an abuser. Good luck in the contest! Hugs and smiles, Susanne
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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Great execution and meaningful content to the Etheree for the contest. The penultimate is hard to read and not choke up when one has suffered at the cruel hands of an abuser. Good luck in the contest! Hugs and smiles, Susanne
Comment Written 06-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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That you so much Susanne - I'm so glad you liked the Etheree. It was my first attempt at one, and it was challenging. There are so many types of abuse going on in this world, one can only pray that, as more and more women speak up, that it will one day get better. Again, thanks for your very kind comments and lovely rating.
Comment from SamanthaD.
Yes, unfortunate as you said, that there is such rampant abuse in our society! I like the way you captured in your poem the brutality of the abuser "blaming" his vixtim for "making him" do it. What a loser! Great writing! Samantha
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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Yes, unfortunate as you said, that there is such rampant abuse in our society! I like the way you captured in your poem the brutality of the abuser "blaming" his vixtim for "making him" do it. What a loser! Great writing! Samantha
Comment Written 06-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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Thanks Samantha - I appreciate your thoughtful comments. Yes, I think that the way of the coward - blame the innocent (yet weaker)for their own lack of self-control. I thank you so much for reading my work and appreciate your comments and lovely rating.
Comment from adewpearl
abused/used, discarded/disregarded - striking word choices and rhyming pairs
Your descriptions are unsparing and powerful in this compelling indictment of violent abuse - and your poem is in good form. Brooke
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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abused/used, discarded/disregarded - striking word choices and rhyming pairs
Your descriptions are unsparing and powerful in this compelling indictment of violent abuse - and your poem is in good form. Brooke
Comment Written 06-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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Thanks Brooke, first time I've tried this form, and I really liked using it, challenging but fun. It's a tough topic for sure, but such an important one. I so appreciate your very thoughtful comments and lovely rating. Much appreciated.
Comment from jwlee211
Such a hard poem. You start with strong words and continue to build from there. The last line great word choice. You grab the reader with the emotion and strength of words. Great job
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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Such a hard poem. You start with strong words and continue to build from there. The last line great word choice. You grab the reader with the emotion and strength of words. Great job
Comment Written 05-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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WOW, I thank you soooo much for this wonderful "6"! I am honored. This is a tough subject to write about, but such an important one, I believe. Thank you again, for reading my work, your kind comments, and of course, for the awesome "6"!!!
Comment from Jeanie Mercer
How sad that this situation is apparently rampant; I suspect it has always been more prevalent than we may have guessed. The poem is well done--interesting form. Best regards, Jeanie Mercer
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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How sad that this situation is apparently rampant; I suspect it has always been more prevalent than we may have guessed. The poem is well done--interesting form. Best regards, Jeanie Mercer
Comment Written 05-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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Thanks Jeanie, yes, it's a different form, but one that I found challenging. I sense you are right about the abuse always being there, just kept underwraps so much more than it is now, which is a good thing. Thanks for taking the time to review and comment and for your lovely rating.
Comment from LostAgain
Wow, that is just powerful. It perfectly conveys how any of us will feel when our dreams are taken from us or simply die before our eyes. Very deep stuff all around.
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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Wow, that is just powerful. It perfectly conveys how any of us will feel when our dreams are taken from us or simply die before our eyes. Very deep stuff all around.
Comment Written 05-Jun-2010
reply by the author on 06-Jun-2010
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Thank you Lost - it is such a tragic topic, and one that isn't easy to write about, however, it's so important. I thank you kindly for your wonderful comments and lovely rating.