A Leaf on the Wind
Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "Diane"Autobiography of abuse
15 total reviews
Comment from laurelp
Slowly, I am catching up with the story. It must be strange to live your life like this. I rarely remember anything before the age of five or six. And even those memories are scarse. The one memory I have is strong but mellowed out by age, when my grandmother was in the hospital. She never came out.
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2009
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Slowly, I am catching up with the story. It must be strange to live your life like this. I rarely remember anything before the age of five or six. And even those memories are scarse. The one memory I have is strong but mellowed out by age, when my grandmother was in the hospital. She never came out.
Comment Written 07-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2009
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Thank you for taking the time to catch up. Yes, I had, and still do, have an exeptional memory.
Comment from DecrepitOldBag
You are so very lucky to have had such a loving mother. Yours sounds like the mummy I always wanted. However, from your tale, even a little girl as loved as you so obviously were, still suffered in secret. Great job.
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2009
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You are so very lucky to have had such a loving mother. Yours sounds like the mummy I always wanted. However, from your tale, even a little girl as loved as you so obviously were, still suffered in secret. Great job.
Comment Written 07-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 07-Feb-2009
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Thank you very much. I hope you read more and can handle the many ups and downs to come.
Comment from Stuart7
biographical non fiction is my favourite genre and this
is very well writtten. i feel very sorry for valarie at
sucha young age to be so affected by life. how cruel
you tell it well and keep the reader interested. Regards
Stuart.
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2009
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biographical non fiction is my favourite genre and this
is very well writtten. i feel very sorry for valarie at
sucha young age to be so affected by life. how cruel
you tell it well and keep the reader interested. Regards
Stuart.
Comment Written 05-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 05-Feb-2009
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Thank you for your kind words.
Comment from FredCollingwood
It's a good story and pretty well written. It has a couple of minor puncttuation , nits, but three spelling erroes is a bit too much to warrant five stars.
Although she tries to ignore the (sress) in her life() she continues to withdraw. Sp; add comma
The horse() Diane was riding bolted and threw her onto the ground > comma
over the (possiblity) of forgetting > sp
occurred when she was a (babay) > sp
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reply by the author on 04-Feb-2009
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It's a good story and pretty well written. It has a couple of minor puncttuation , nits, but three spelling erroes is a bit too much to warrant five stars.
Although she tries to ignore the (sress) in her life() she continues to withdraw. Sp; add comma
The horse() Diane was riding bolted and threw her onto the ground > comma
over the (possiblity) of forgetting > sp
occurred when she was a (babay) > sp
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 04-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2009
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Thank you for your comments. I will work on my poor spelling. Again, thank you.
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They're simply opportunities for improvements. Redo where necessary and get back to me. I'll be happy to re-review and rate both a five. They deserve it.
Fred
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Not a problem. I need, want, encourage and look forward to people pointing out my errors....I cover it in the book but I am ditslexic and the world's worst speller, and I don't say that with pride. I didn't learn to read until I was in the 7th grade thanks to a teacher who reached out and helped me. I use spell check but I still miss words. I can use all the help I can get. Again, thanks for your suggestions and kind words of encouragement.
Comment from utopian_dream_x
Thank you for the description of Valerie. It helped. This story is coming along well. Your dialogue is great and keeps the reader interested.
"I cannot help it(,) mommy. I really miss her(,)" I said fighting back th(e) tears.
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reply by the author on 04-Feb-2009
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Thank you for the description of Valerie. It helped. This story is coming along well. Your dialogue is great and keeps the reader interested.
"I cannot help it(,) mommy. I really miss her(,)" I said fighting back th(e) tears.
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 04-Feb-2009
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2009
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Thak you for your suggestions. I try to catch all my sp elling and grammar errors but seem to be blind when reading my own work. All critiques are welcome.