Reflections For The New Day
Viewing comments for Chapter 53 "Dying Daisies And Trampled Hearts"16 total reviews
Comment from GerryMacNeil
Good for you, Jewell! I am proud of you for standing up and saying, "That's enough!" I like your note, and I think you would have gotten a whole lot of satisfaction out of forcing a rhyme with "pluck"! Just one note on word usage:
"resorted to stop crying"--I suspect you mean "resolved to stop cryiing". "Resorted" is what is called a transitive verb, and is usually followed by "to" and a verb ending in "ing" like "lying"
Good show, m'dear! Gerry
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2008
   |
Good for you, Jewell! I am proud of you for standing up and saying, "That's enough!" I like your note, and I think you would have gotten a whole lot of satisfaction out of forcing a rhyme with "pluck"! Just one note on word usage:
"resorted to stop crying"--I suspect you mean "resolved to stop cryiing". "Resorted" is what is called a transitive verb, and is usually followed by "to" and a verb ending in "ing" like "lying"
Good show, m'dear! Gerry
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 22-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2008
-
Oh you are so thmart! thanks for the suggestion.
Comment from Judian James
I like it Jewell, but I'm sorry to read it. Better times are coming and so are better men! This is very well written on that famous Daisy theme. You brought a new voice. well done
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2008
|
I like it Jewell, but I'm sorry to read it. Better times are coming and so are better men! This is very well written on that famous Daisy theme. You brought a new voice. well done
Comment Written 22-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2008
-
Thanks Jude. It's workable but he's not willing to work.
Comment from Adam Smith
Hey, the flower in the picture looks a little bit like your hair! LOL (Beautiful, I mean).
This is really good and I really think you have a very strong message here. You must have enough meaningful and helpful pieces to put a book together by now. You have terrific insights and you express them in such a way as to be immediately recognizable by your voice, and to be easily understood without too much effort, but without a lack of poetic flair.
That was a mouthful. My fingers are numb from typing it.
I loved the use of "dame;" a word I thought long since dead.
Adam
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2008
|
Hey, the flower in the picture looks a little bit like your hair! LOL (Beautiful, I mean).
This is really good and I really think you have a very strong message here. You must have enough meaningful and helpful pieces to put a book together by now. You have terrific insights and you express them in such a way as to be immediately recognizable by your voice, and to be easily understood without too much effort, but without a lack of poetic flair.
That was a mouthful. My fingers are numb from typing it.
I loved the use of "dame;" a word I thought long since dead.
Adam
Comment Written 22-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2008
-
Thanks Adam. Your words are encouraging, since I really didn't think much of this poem Just threw it out there. I appreciate you.
Comment from Writer191
Oh my...and to wonder how any man could resist you! Very nice. I enjoy the rhythm of this, and I love the anology to the daisy. I might replace 'childhood' with 'childish', but that's just me. As usual, I can easily enjoy and relate to your style.
Jim
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2008
|
Oh my...and to wonder how any man could resist you! Very nice. I enjoy the rhythm of this, and I love the anology to the daisy. I might replace 'childhood' with 'childish', but that's just me. As usual, I can easily enjoy and relate to your style.
Jim
Comment Written 22-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2008
-
Oooh I like replacing childhood with childish! Thanks for the suggestion and the kind compliments. It's my fiesty red headed flair he can't handle. Oh well.
Comment from madhilde
Hi Visionary,
Nice job! I really enjoyed reading this poem. You've chosen great words, and paid a lot of attention to rhythm and rhyme. I wouldn't ask you to change a single thing.
Mad
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2008
|
Hi Visionary,
Nice job! I really enjoyed reading this poem. You've chosen great words, and paid a lot of attention to rhythm and rhyme. I wouldn't ask you to change a single thing.
Mad
Comment Written 22-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2008
-
Thanks Mad
Comment from Wendyanne
Hi Jewell. This is a very well written piece of rhyming poetry. I enjoyed your imagery very much, eg, when my heart became the petal That was plucked ot piece by piece. Excellent
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2008
|
Hi Jewell. This is a very well written piece of rhyming poetry. I enjoyed your imagery very much, eg, when my heart became the petal That was plucked ot piece by piece. Excellent
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 22-Aug-2008
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2008
-
Thanks Wendyanne!
