Body of a Horse, Heart of a Man
Viewing comments for Chapter 2 "The Curse of Zeus"A modern twist on Greek Mythology.
21 total reviews
Comment from royowen
Of course Zeus is not fit to be the King of the gods, Phoebus did nothing wrong, perhaps this will sort out Eudora. Man's temper and pride are the two things God hates the most, look what happened to Lucifer and Moses, beautifully written Rhonda, blessings Roy
Typo : (Lightening) bolts, lightning bolts, one lightens a load, and Zeus hurls lightning bolts. 2: He was exag(g)erated.
3: braced himself for the (worse) worst?
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Of course Zeus is not fit to be the King of the gods, Phoebus did nothing wrong, perhaps this will sort out Eudora. Man's temper and pride are the two things God hates the most, look what happened to Lucifer and Moses, beautifully written Rhonda, blessings Roy
Typo : (Lightening) bolts, lightning bolts, one lightens a load, and Zeus hurls lightning bolts. 2: He was exag(g)erated.
3: braced himself for the (worse) worst?
Comment Written 08-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Hi Roy,
Thanks for the review, my friend!!
No, Zeus isn't fit, but I'm not sure any of them are. They are certainly flawed beings. I have found powerful men think their children shouldn't be treated as others are and use their influence to punish people unfairly.
Thanks for finding the flaws. I'm grateful!!
I will tell you, I have always had trouble with lightning and lightening!! It's one of my common flaws myself. The other two were revising issues. I'm glad you caught them!!
Take care,
Rhonda
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My pleasure.
Comment from Mike Stevens
Another fine chapter, Rhonda, young girls, huh? Nothing ever changes I guess, getting dramatic and not seeing the consequence of their actions, lol, now her desired has been turned into a centaur; seems pretty harsh!
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Another fine chapter, Rhonda, young girls, huh? Nothing ever changes I guess, getting dramatic and not seeing the consequence of their actions, lol, now her desired has been turned into a centaur; seems pretty harsh!
Comment Written 08-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Hehe, you're so right!! Girls and their daddies. I'll say, mine never was that extreme, thought I probably thought he should have been, hehe.
Thanks for the review!!
Rhonda
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I am curious is Zeus will ever free Phoebus. He's lost his daughter over it, but will Eudora ever realize her part in this. I do hope so. I can't wait to read more. This is a good write.
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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I am curious is Zeus will ever free Phoebus. He's lost his daughter over it, but will Eudora ever realize her part in this. I do hope so. I can't wait to read more. This is a good write.
Comment Written 08-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Hi Barbara,
Thank you so much for the review, my friend. The next time you see Phoebus, years will have passed and he won't even remember his former life. Some things, however will remain the same about him.
Hugs,
Rhonda
Comment from Sally Law
Rhonda dear,
First, my congratulations on Book of the Month win. I'm so proud of you! It was a tight contest down to the wire! However, I knew you'd have it. :))
This is an exceptional chapter and I could feel the thunder of Zeus coming. Poor Phoebus and poor Endora. I feel for both of them. I don't think it's what she had in mind. I don't think they can marry now. Hell hath no fury greater than a god insulted.
Wonderfully written and illustrated too. More, please!!
Sending you my best today as always, and Love & Blessings across the miles.
Sal XOs
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Rhonda dear,
First, my congratulations on Book of the Month win. I'm so proud of you! It was a tight contest down to the wire! However, I knew you'd have it. :))
This is an exceptional chapter and I could feel the thunder of Zeus coming. Poor Phoebus and poor Endora. I feel for both of them. I don't think it's what she had in mind. I don't think they can marry now. Hell hath no fury greater than a god insulted.
Wonderfully written and illustrated too. More, please!!
Sending you my best today as always, and Love & Blessings across the miles.
Sal XOs
Comment Written 08-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Sally, thank you so much for your six star review!!! You are so sweet and this was a great start to my day. That was an exciting race yesterday, and I appreciate your support with it.
On the current book, thank you for the six star rating. Eudora didn't really mean for her father to cause such a big fuss over what was just a youngster's squabble. For sure, they won't get together now. Her father ended that. But, now he's off for a life of his own in Concorde Valley. Unfortunately, Zeus isn't one to insult. He's an overprotective father with an unfortunate temper!!!
Much love,
Rhonda
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You're so very welcome for the six stars, my friend. A fabulous chapter indeed and so well written. Yes, Zeus is a tough one. But there's love for everyone, apparently, so we wait as the story unfolds.
Love & Blessing across the bridge today!
Sal XOs
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Thank you so much, and love and blessings back to you!!
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My pleasure as always, dear friend! Love across the bridge today,
Sal XOs
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Wow, Rhonda, what a read! I'm aghast at Zeus' uncontrollable temper and the punishment brought on poor Phoebus! This chapter had wonderful momentum from the time he didn't show at the party, we knew there was trouble in store. But not to this extent. Zeus' temper is beautifully matched to the imagery of lightening bolts and his eyes dripping fire. I'm scared stiff of him and yet Phoebus remained so dignified and unyielding. Dialogue, building character of the four, is superb. And what a note to leave us on! I'm well and truly hooked. Just some small suggestions below:
But did he have the courage not (to) turn up at the party..
Humiliation, like patience, was not something Eudora enjoyed (maybe 'tolerated' to give extra force/character?)
horrified green eye(d) ones
Well done! Debbie
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Wow, Rhonda, what a read! I'm aghast at Zeus' uncontrollable temper and the punishment brought on poor Phoebus! This chapter had wonderful momentum from the time he didn't show at the party, we knew there was trouble in store. But not to this extent. Zeus' temper is beautifully matched to the imagery of lightening bolts and his eyes dripping fire. I'm scared stiff of him and yet Phoebus remained so dignified and unyielding. Dialogue, building character of the four, is superb. And what a note to leave us on! I'm well and truly hooked. Just some small suggestions below:
But did he have the courage not (to) turn up at the party..
Humiliation, like patience, was not something Eudora enjoyed (maybe 'tolerated' to give extra force/character?)
horrified green eye(d) ones
Well done! Debbie
Comment Written 08-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Debbie,
Thank you so much for your six star review!
Thank you for being very specific about what you think worked well. That is so helpful!!
I'm glad this chapter brought in the fire I've tried to build. It's about to take another turn as I bring it to modern days.
Thank you for finding the mistakes. I will fix those at once.
Thanks for all your support,
Hugs,
Rhonda
Comment from Pam (respa)
Excellent artwork and story to go with it, Rhonda. The opening scenes are very good as Phoebus considers his current life, his goals and dreams, and the changes that would take place if he got romantically involved with someone. He was honest with himself and had worthy goals he wanted to pursue to help others. I'm glad to see you have him think about it. It wasn't a decision he took lightly, but he ended up being misunderstood and punished.
Eudora thought like most young women would in her situation. She took a chance, too, by deciding to approach him about it. Unfortunately, she seemed full of pride in her looks and the feeling that he wouldn't be able to resist her. But her emotions got the best of her, and she could never have anticipated her father's reaction. I like how you have him bring the horse into the situation, and he even looked afraid of the god.
Zeus' temper gets the best of him, and acts rather than think about his decision. Neither his wife or Eudora didn't want this, but he had his mind made up, unfortunately for Phoebus.
It will be interesting to see where things go from here. You did a good job with a family crisis and showing the repercussions even though the characters are mythological ones. Even the mighty Zeus can't make a change seeing how distraught his wife and daughter were. Very well done, my friend.
One note: after "the creature was gone," you are missing the picture. If you have trouble putting it in, let me know.
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Excellent artwork and story to go with it, Rhonda. The opening scenes are very good as Phoebus considers his current life, his goals and dreams, and the changes that would take place if he got romantically involved with someone. He was honest with himself and had worthy goals he wanted to pursue to help others. I'm glad to see you have him think about it. It wasn't a decision he took lightly, but he ended up being misunderstood and punished.
Eudora thought like most young women would in her situation. She took a chance, too, by deciding to approach him about it. Unfortunately, she seemed full of pride in her looks and the feeling that he wouldn't be able to resist her. But her emotions got the best of her, and she could never have anticipated her father's reaction. I like how you have him bring the horse into the situation, and he even looked afraid of the god.
Zeus' temper gets the best of him, and acts rather than think about his decision. Neither his wife or Eudora didn't want this, but he had his mind made up, unfortunately for Phoebus.
It will be interesting to see where things go from here. You did a good job with a family crisis and showing the repercussions even though the characters are mythological ones. Even the mighty Zeus can't make a change seeing how distraught his wife and daughter were. Very well done, my friend.
One note: after "the creature was gone," you are missing the picture. If you have trouble putting it in, let me know.
Comment Written 08-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Hi Pam, thank you so much for the six star review and very detailed review. It was all very supportive and helpful!!! I did try and play their lives as reflective of our own. Funny, but I had written this already when a similar situation happened at school between a highly regarded member of our community and his daughter who complained about a small thing a teacher did, and he threw a huge fit that affected all her teachers. She was so upset she told him and begged him not to do what he did.
On the picture, it was a Centaur, which my AI refused to get the point on how to make one. I tried a different site to get it, but I guess it wasn't going to show up. I just need a good copyright free Centaur to put in its place.
Thank you,
Rhonda
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You are very welcome and deserving of the stars and review, Rhonda. Thanks for sharing about the teaching situation. I think those kinds of things often find their way in our writing. Try freepic.com for the picture or pixabay. Let me know how you do.
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Okay, thanks. I sure will!!
Comment from Begin Again
Of course, it's a well deserved six from me! I simply loved the tension and emotions that you wove within the story and I could feel the Phoebus pain, yet he stayed true to himself as Zeus's rage fell on his shoulders--well done!
smiles and hugs, Carol
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Of course, it's a well deserved six from me! I simply loved the tension and emotions that you wove within the story and I could feel the Phoebus pain, yet he stayed true to himself as Zeus's rage fell on his shoulders--well done!
smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment Written 08-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Hi Carol!!!! Thank you for the six stars and for letting me know I won. Lol, I forgot to check when I got up. It was a great way to find out, from a friend!!
Thank you for your comments on the story as well. Phoebus couldn't cower, for sure. He's Poseidon's son, even if he won't remember it.
Big hugs,
Rhonda
Comment from BethShelby
That is quite a punishment to be merged with horse. So you posted a new book about the Gods. I look forward to reading it. Congratulation on winning the book of month.
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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That is quite a punishment to be merged with horse. So you posted a new book about the Gods. I look forward to reading it. Congratulation on winning the book of month.
Comment Written 08-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Hi Beth, thanks for joining the story. I need to catch up with you, too. I got really far behind when my 19-year-old grandson moved in and we've been trying to rearrange the house. Also starting me back to work, and Kylie starting school. Just now coming back to surface, lol.
Thanks again,
Rhonda
Comment from Jacob1395
That was a horrible thing for Zeus to do turning him into a Centaur. I think Eudora will come to regret telling her father about what her conversation with Phoebus. I really liked the conversation between her and Zeus at the start. It really does make them feel human, and you do a brilliant job of giving them their own desires. I just spotted one error, here you've written, "He wanted to fulfill his role as god, and to lead and help humans." Do you mean: "He wanted to fulfill his role as a god?" Another excellent chapter, Rhonda. I really enjoyed reading it.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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That was a horrible thing for Zeus to do turning him into a Centaur. I think Eudora will come to regret telling her father about what her conversation with Phoebus. I really liked the conversation between her and Zeus at the start. It really does make them feel human, and you do a brilliant job of giving them their own desires. I just spotted one error, here you've written, "He wanted to fulfill his role as god, and to lead and help humans." Do you mean: "He wanted to fulfill his role as a god?" Another excellent chapter, Rhonda. I really enjoyed reading it.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 08-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Hi Jacob,
Thanks so much for the review, my friend. Yes, Zeus was over the top with the punishment, but was known for rash behavior. Besides, lol, it works with my Centaur story.
Thanks for finding the error. That certainly changes the meaning, lol.
Take care and thanks for reviewing,
Rhonda
Comment from Debi Pick Marquette
Awesome chapter, but so sad. I know this is one I will enjoy week after week. I was thinking she was going to lie about him so if she's spoiled, I see where she gets it from. LOL. Zeus, what a hot head! I am so glad I am on board. This is a wonderful story. Great job dear friend!
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Awesome chapter, but so sad. I know this is one I will enjoy week after week. I was thinking she was going to lie about him so if she's spoiled, I see where she gets it from. LOL. Zeus, what a hot head! I am so glad I am on board. This is a wonderful story. Great job dear friend!
Comment Written 08-Sep-2024
reply by the author on 08-Sep-2024
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Debi,
Thank you so very much for your six star rating, and for joining in on the book!!! You are precious and I appreciate you going outside your comfort zone for my silly fantasy stuff. I appreciate you!!
Hugs,
Rhonda
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I had enjoyed the first chapter so much I couldn't go to bed without reading. That is a testament of a great book. Speaking of, CONGRATS!
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Thank you!!!! It was a great greeting to my morning. I've never won first before. Thanks to all of my friends for everything you do to support me!!!!
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When I won book a couple months ago I never thanked the 7 star one so I always have that in my review box when Im done with all the others I always have that to look at
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Ohhhh, okay. I already did, but I took a picture of it to save on my phone, lol.
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LOL, me to and I put a copy of it in my FS album. I have an album for all my kids and grandkids and childhood, FS, Kenzies art, etc..etc
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awwww. I didn't even know it existed, and that's a great idea to make an album!!!
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I think it depends what you use for your picture storage, but I have cloud and they offer albums. I must have forty of them. Then when I want to find one of my five thousand pictures I know right where to go. However, I am kinda behind on them lately.
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Wow, that's awesome!! I wouldn't even know where to begin. I've been trying to get Centaur pictures, which seem hard to come by. The two I've tried so far seem to disappear after a bit. I've tried a third one now.
Hugs,
Rhonda
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I will see if I can find some centaur pictures for you. What color? Oh, it is a black stallion centaur, right??