Return To Concorde Valley
Viewing comments for Chapter 44 "Theo's Response "Fantasy based on the intersection of two worlds.
19 total reviews
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
It doesn't sound good to be in charge of the Underworld. Hades seems to have found it his kind of place. Unfortunately, it made him less than appealing to Echo. Besides, fate meant her to be with Theo. This is a great story that is easy to read and to believe in another world with its own laws and rules.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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It doesn't sound good to be in charge of the Underworld. Hades seems to have found it his kind of place. Unfortunately, it made him less than appealing to Echo. Besides, fate meant her to be with Theo. This is a great story that is easy to read and to believe in another world with its own laws and rules.
Comment Written 06-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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Awww, Carol, thank you so very much for your insight and invaluable comments. I tried to create a new world based on the one people are familiar with, then add in new elements. I'm glad it worked!!
Hugs,
Rhonda
Comment from BOO ghost
BOO is reading...picked a couple of interesting paragraphs,
"And then, with all the love an eight-year-old boy could possibly have in his heart, I kissed her on the cheek, and transferred my gift of immortality to her. She must have loved me, too, or it never would have worked."
For a moment, no one talked; even Hades seemed floored by the news. Only Hermes stirred, and even then it was to slip closer to Theo and Echo. He did not intend to let Echo slip away again if his uncle attacked.
Seems well written, no negatives. Like I always tell prose writers, don't forget to use Show! That's my tip.
BOO!
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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BOO is reading...picked a couple of interesting paragraphs,
"And then, with all the love an eight-year-old boy could possibly have in his heart, I kissed her on the cheek, and transferred my gift of immortality to her. She must have loved me, too, or it never would have worked."
For a moment, no one talked; even Hades seemed floored by the news. Only Hermes stirred, and even then it was to slip closer to Theo and Echo. He did not intend to let Echo slip away again if his uncle attacked.
Seems well written, no negatives. Like I always tell prose writers, don't forget to use Show! That's my tip.
BOO!
Comment Written 06-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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Hi Boo!!! Thanks for materializing into the story.
What do you mean about using show? I always like Boo's advice!
Take care,
Rhonda
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Oh, show is used instead of tell. The sun rose, example. Instead of telling that the sun rose, you describe the sun in detail, perhaps the colors of the sun.
An orb of red, orange, purple, yellow, colors, invaded the darkness. Example. Usually told in passive voice instead of active voice of telling. The boy went to the store is active voice.
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Ahhhh, I get it, thanks.
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Wow, this is quite a complex chapter, clarifying Echo's background with Theo and all the dynamics and relationships between the gods. It's a lot to take in but, as ever, your excellent dialogue advances the plot with excitement and suspense (because we're never quite sure what Hades is going to do and how this is all going to resolve). The pictures are a great addition to your story and I love the one of the young Theo and Echo. Well done, Rhonda! I can only imagine how much work has gone into this with so many characters and keeping your reader abreast of all the facts. Quite a juggling act:)) Thank you so much for sharing your delightful post as it nears the book's completion. A couple of suggestions below: Take care Debbie xo
Thanatos, do you mind if I enlighte(n) him?
while you reigned from you(r) own castle
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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Wow, this is quite a complex chapter, clarifying Echo's background with Theo and all the dynamics and relationships between the gods. It's a lot to take in but, as ever, your excellent dialogue advances the plot with excitement and suspense (because we're never quite sure what Hades is going to do and how this is all going to resolve). The pictures are a great addition to your story and I love the one of the young Theo and Echo. Well done, Rhonda! I can only imagine how much work has gone into this with so many characters and keeping your reader abreast of all the facts. Quite a juggling act:)) Thank you so much for sharing your delightful post as it nears the book's completion. A couple of suggestions below: Take care Debbie xo
Thanatos, do you mind if I enlighte(n) him?
while you reigned from you(r) own castle
Comment Written 06-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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Hi Debi,
Thank you so much for your six star review. I'm sorry for it taking so long to respond. The students came back to school today and it's taken hours of preparation, which I know you know.
You were right about the juggling act, and is why it takes me so long to post sometimes. I go over and over it with a fine-toothed comb trying to make sure I account for everything.
Probably two more chapters, then I'll call this one finished. I'm glad the pictures help. They are fun to include. It actually helps me as I'm revising to stay focused on the flow of the plot.
Thanks for finding the mistakes. They always creep in!!
Hugs,
Rhonda
Comment from Mike Stevens
Another fine chapter, Rhonda----will Theo prevail in his slight disagreement with
Hades? Will Hades give up or will the stench of the underworld cling to Theo as foretold by Hades? Tune in next week when all will be revealed!
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reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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Another fine chapter, Rhonda----will Theo prevail in his slight disagreement with
Hades? Will Hades give up or will the stench of the underworld cling to Theo as foretold by Hades? Tune in next week when all will be revealed!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 06-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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Hi Mike,
Thanks for the cute review!! I'm afraid Hades brought the stench with him, lol. A whole set of poor choices he wants to blame on his job!! Take care, my friend,
Rhonda
Comment from Ulla
Hi Rhonda, what a wonderful and powerful chapter. Yes, it was very long but it was worth it. So Echo finally got to her senses and chose Theo over Hades. Thank goodness for that. I just love this story. Hugs, Ulla xcx
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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Hi Rhonda, what a wonderful and powerful chapter. Yes, it was very long but it was worth it. So Echo finally got to her senses and chose Theo over Hades. Thank goodness for that. I just love this story. Hugs, Ulla xcx
Comment Written 06-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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Hi Ulla,
Thank you so much for the lovely six stars, my friend!! Thanks, also, for reading it through. I kept trying to stop it at places, but it just wouldn't work until all the truth came out. There are a few chapters left.
Big hugs,
Rhonda
Comment from Sally Law
Oh my goodness! This was long and soooo good, I didn't want it to end! WOW! Another fabulous chapter with Theo and Echo together at last. Of course it's true to love and life, but as in life, love always prevails. The details of the immortals' souls has to be worked out, obviously.
Brava! Brava! Another wonderful chapter and so beautifully written and illustrated.
Sending you my best today as always and Love & Blessings across the bridge.
Sal XOs
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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Oh my goodness! This was long and soooo good, I didn't want it to end! WOW! Another fabulous chapter with Theo and Echo together at last. Of course it's true to love and life, but as in life, love always prevails. The details of the immortals' souls has to be worked out, obviously.
Brava! Brava! Another wonderful chapter and so beautifully written and illustrated.
Sending you my best today as always and Love & Blessings across the bridge.
Sal XOs
Comment Written 06-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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My dearest Sally,
Thank you so much for the brilliant 6 stars. They are so very much appreciated as are you.
True love always prevails, even if it has to pass through the testing fires first. More will come out in the next chapter as Theo has to explain himself for not letting Echo know she was an immortal, lol. Or as Ricky Ricardo said, the has some 'splaining to do.
Thank you, thank you!
Much love back across the bridge. Love and laughter,
Rhonda
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How did you know I grew up on a steady diet of I Love Lucy? Remember when TV was good? Idunno. I'm watching more and more reruns of tjegood stuff these days and reading good books like Return to Concorde Valley!
Love ya!
Sal Xoxo
Oh, and you're most welcome for the six stars... always! :))
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Awww, I loved her, too!! Those were simpler days, for sure. Yeah, I watch a lot of the old reruns, too!! Can't beat them. Thank you for the comments about my books. I have fun writing them.
Love you much,
Rhonda
Comment from prettybluebirds
Wonderful writing. I love this unusual love story. Your descriptions and dialogue bring this story to life, and I can envision each scene as it unfolds.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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Wonderful writing. I love this unusual love story. Your descriptions and dialogue bring this story to life, and I can envision each scene as it unfolds.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 06-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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Hi my friend.
You're right, it is an unusual love story, lol, but love is love and in the end wins out. A few more things left to explain before the book is finished. Thanks for sticking it out.
Hugs,
Rhonda
Comment from barbara.wilkey
There's not a great stopping point in this post. It needed to be written as one. I love the story. I'm glad Echo chose Theo, and it seems all will work out. Hades will be defeated. I was surprised when Echo's former boss and son showed up. LOL
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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There's not a great stopping point in this post. It needed to be written as one. I love the story. I'm glad Echo chose Theo, and it seems all will work out. Hades will be defeated. I was surprised when Echo's former boss and son showed up. LOL
Comment Written 06-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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Hi Barbara, thank you so much for the six stars. I appreciate it so much. I'm glad you agreed with me on there being no stopping point. Originally, I had the last chapter written in with his one, but was able to break it, even if it did leave a bigger cliff hanger than needed to be.
Thanks so much for staying the course with this book. I've appreciated all you've done.
Hugs,
Rhonda
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This is a really good story. I love it.
Comment from Begin Again
this story gets better by the minute, Rhonda. You've ramped it up and given us so much to digest and enjoy. Awesome that Hades is about to be outsmarted and brought to his knees. Wonderful story writing.
Smiles and hugs, Carol
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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this story gets better by the minute, Rhonda. You've ramped it up and given us so much to digest and enjoy. Awesome that Hades is about to be outsmarted and brought to his knees. Wonderful story writing.
Smiles and hugs, Carol
Comment Written 06-Aug-2024
reply by the author on 08-Aug-2024
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Hi Carol,
Thanks so much for the six star rating. I really do appreciate it!! I know I'm late getting back to you and that I've fallen woefully behind on your new book, but I'm back to work now and the students started back today. I'm wiped out, lol. It will take time to pace myself again.
Hugs,
Rhonda
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I understand! I've had my share of trouble here as well so I am not writing as fast as I did before. Hopefully life will smooth out and we can all get a nice easy pace.
Smiles, Carol
