Return To Concorde Valley
Viewing comments for Chapter 39 "Mortality"Fantasy based on the intersection of two worlds.
22 total reviews
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Wow, Rhonda, you've put your all into this and fully immersed the reader into this magnificent, mythological world! I'm being introduced to creatures I've never heard before, such as the Stymphalian birds, a fearful challenge to the two intrepid warriors. "Don't let your guard down" an understatement! And the drama, strength and beauty of Nifty wonderfully counters the horrors they meet. I love that Hermes still retains his magical speed on foot, not to mention his powerful sword. This is all building up beautifully, Rhonda, and we have faith that Theo will be saved. Thanks for sharing. Debbie
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2024
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Wow, Rhonda, you've put your all into this and fully immersed the reader into this magnificent, mythological world! I'm being introduced to creatures I've never heard before, such as the Stymphalian birds, a fearful challenge to the two intrepid warriors. "Don't let your guard down" an understatement! And the drama, strength and beauty of Nifty wonderfully counters the horrors they meet. I love that Hermes still retains his magical speed on foot, not to mention his powerful sword. This is all building up beautifully, Rhonda, and we have faith that Theo will be saved. Thanks for sharing. Debbie
Comment Written 24-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2024
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Debbie, thank you for the six stars and very lovely review. I had a lot of fun writing it. It?s funny, but I had the word intrepid in there at first, but changed it thinking it didn?t flow well in the sentence.
Thanks again for all your support!
Rhonda
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Oh, Rhonda, that was thrilling! At least Hermes still has strength and speed, that will cause the Twins some problems, big ones, too! I hope they managed to stop Adam being ripped apart! The beginning of this, the way you described the pain Theo and Hermes were suffering, I was holding my breath! This is another fabulous chapter, my clever friend. Now I have to wait again! :)) Love and hugs Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2024
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Oh, Rhonda, that was thrilling! At least Hermes still has strength and speed, that will cause the Twins some problems, big ones, too! I hope they managed to stop Adam being ripped apart! The beginning of this, the way you described the pain Theo and Hermes were suffering, I was holding my breath! This is another fabulous chapter, my clever friend. Now I have to wait again! :)) Love and hugs Sandra xxx
Comment Written 24-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2024
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Hello again, Sandra.
Thank you for the six stars and for returning to review two posts!
I appreciate your comments and their specificity. All so supportive.
I?d better get writing on the next one.
Hugs,
Rhonda
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
This is a good buildup to the battle for life or death. Theo and Hermes must give up their eternal life and then battle the Stympalian birds, armored creatures built for war. Neither backs down from the battle even though loss now means death.
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2024
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This is a good buildup to the battle for life or death. Theo and Hermes must give up their eternal life and then battle the Stympalian birds, armored creatures built for war. Neither backs down from the battle even though loss now means death.
Comment Written 23-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2024
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Carol, thank you so very much for the six stars, my friend!!
You summarized the whole chapter in a few sentences. Great job!! I need you to write the summary of the book for the back cover, lol. Thank you, thank you!
Rhonda
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I hate writing summaries. It's harder than writing the book.
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I totally agree!! I remember the first book I published, I had to write my own author's bio for the cover. I was appalled. I always thought other people did it for you, lol. I have to make myself sound good.
Comment from royowen
What an excellent episode Rhonda, with the two magnificent war horses as one with their mounted men, coursing into battle as two legged ones and four legged, what foe can stand against them? A great post Rhonda, as always a great story, who needs ports? Much blessings Roy
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2024
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What an excellent episode Rhonda, with the two magnificent war horses as one with their mounted men, coursing into battle as two legged ones and four legged, what foe can stand against them? A great post Rhonda, as always a great story, who needs ports? Much blessings Roy
Comment Written 23-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2024
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Thank you so very much for the review, Roy. I appreciate your time and effort.
Take care,
Rhonda
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Most welcome
Comment from Allezw2
You've a nice little romp through Greek Mythology, here. It ranks well as a young adult novel with its gee-whiz magical metamorphoses. I wish you'd used another word for the remnants of Hermes' winged sandals than 'painful stumps' without explanation of how Theo knew they were painful. The writing seems episodic with passages leaping from one to the next. Your premise is solid, grounded as is in the historical characters known to us. Live long and write well, Fantasist
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2024
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You've a nice little romp through Greek Mythology, here. It ranks well as a young adult novel with its gee-whiz magical metamorphoses. I wish you'd used another word for the remnants of Hermes' winged sandals than 'painful stumps' without explanation of how Theo knew they were painful. The writing seems episodic with passages leaping from one to the next. Your premise is solid, grounded as is in the historical characters known to us. Live long and write well, Fantasist
Comment Written 23-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2024
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Hi my friend. You nailed my target audience. I teach high school science, and started writing books on a dare from them several years back.
I changed the stump thing. You're right, it didn't sound right.
That's what I like about this site, we get the benefit of friendly correction. It's like a tea room or coffee house where a group of writers can sit and discuss their work.
Take care,
and thanks,
Rhonda
Comment from Mike Stevens
And the adventure continues in yet another fine chapter, Rhonda.....danger awaits Theo, Hermes, and the horses. Will they be triumphant or get their asses handed to them in a bag? Join us and excited anticipation for another thrilling chapter of Return to Concorde Valley,
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reply by the author on 23-Jun-2024
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And the adventure continues in yet another fine chapter, Rhonda.....danger awaits Theo, Hermes, and the horses. Will they be triumphant or get their asses handed to them in a bag? Join us and excited anticipation for another thrilling chapter of Return to Concorde Valley,
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 23-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2024
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I love your reviews, Mike. You always make me smile!! Thanks for that.
Take care,
Rhonda
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Glad you enjoy them, Rhonda, thanks
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I just know Theo and Hermes are going to be victorious they just have to be, and they need to return to the ones they love. Echo is waiting for him. Is Hannah the lady Hermes loves? Just want to be clear. I really like this story.
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2024
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I just know Theo and Hermes are going to be victorious they just have to be, and they need to return to the ones they love. Echo is waiting for him. Is Hannah the lady Hermes loves? Just want to be clear. I really like this story.
Comment Written 23-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2024
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Hi Barbara, Thank you so much for the six stars. Always appreciated, my friend.
Hannah is 7, so no, she's not the one Hermes is in love with. I know it's hard to keep track when I have so many characters, lol.
Theo and Hermes have a lot to go through over the next few miles. The next few chapters are going to be pretty fast paced before there's a calm chapter, lol.
Thanks for keeping up,
Rhonda
Comment from Daylily
Totally love your gorgeous picture. I used to have a black Tennessee Walker that won first place in one of the Halter classes at the county fair. However, he was not even close to having the magnificence of this painted one. But I digress.....
Theo breathed in life and exhaled anxiety. -- This is just one beautiful example of your exemplary writing.
I can hardly wait to read the next chapter.
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2024
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Totally love your gorgeous picture. I used to have a black Tennessee Walker that won first place in one of the Halter classes at the county fair. However, he was not even close to having the magnificence of this painted one. But I digress.....
Theo breathed in life and exhaled anxiety. -- This is just one beautiful example of your exemplary writing.
I can hardly wait to read the next chapter.
Comment Written 23-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2024
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Lily, thank you so very much for the six star review, my friend!! You'll have to use your horse's picture on a post so we can see him!! I do love horses, but we have cattle and the two don't mix well.
I appreciate your comments and you're pointing out a line that stood out to you. That is very helpful!!
Hugs,
Rhonda
Comment from Pamusart
Hi, davisr. I hope you are well
Wow. I'm still trying to process this. Of course I missed a lot chapters since I only came back to fan story last month.
But this is a very entertaining chapter in what's probably a very entertaining novel
It was probably made clear in previous chapters, but I'm not clear who the twins are and where they fit
Isn't nifty a horse? So he's immortal.?
" Nifty, the only Immortal left in the lot, joined him as one beast."
I really like reading your book chapter
Good job. Thank you for sharing.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2024
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Hi, davisr. I hope you are well
Wow. I'm still trying to process this. Of course I missed a lot chapters since I only came back to fan story last month.
But this is a very entertaining chapter in what's probably a very entertaining novel
It was probably made clear in previous chapters, but I'm not clear who the twins are and where they fit
Isn't nifty a horse? So he's immortal.?
" Nifty, the only Immortal left in the lot, joined him as one beast."
I really like reading your book chapter
Good job. Thank you for sharing.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 23-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2024
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Hi Pam. I've tried to keep a running summary of the book going in the author's notes, and I hope it and a list of the characters helps, but it doesn't cover everything.
Nifty is an immortal horse. His real name is Magnificent, as all horses in Concorde Valley, one ruled by a Centaur, are given names that describe something they do or a characteristic of them. Theo calls him Nifty. He was the first born of a cross between an immortal horse of Theo's father, and a really cool mortal horse of his mother's.
The Twins are Hypnos and Thanatos, who are powerful primordial beings that even the god are afraid of. Hypnos has the power to put people to sleep and mess with their dreams, which Thanatos is over death. Hades works under him. Hades is the bad guy in my story, having taken over Mount Olympus and is trying to take over its subsidiary. Concorde Valley, which has some powerful protectors. Theo, the Crowned Prince and acting Monarch of Concorde Valley, has gone to them for help to defeat Hades, who is planning to attack Concorde in a few days. In order to get their help, Theo, and his helper Hermes, the only god to escape the coupe on the Mountain, must temporarily give up their immortality and prove themselves valiant. They must, also, give the Twins whatever they ask as a gift. What they want, the men don't know, but are taking the challenge none-the-less.
I hope that helps.
Take care,
Rhonda
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Yes Brenda. It does help thank you.
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Close, Rhonda. Hang in there, you'll get all our names. I write them in a book, but don't tell anyone, lol.
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Thanks
Comment from Ulla
Hi Rhonda, as usual you didn't disappoint. This was a great and rather dramatic chapter. I absolutely loved it and I can't wait to see how they're going to proceed. I so enjoy reading this great adventure. A big hug, Ulla xcx
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2024
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Hi Rhonda, as usual you didn't disappoint. This was a great and rather dramatic chapter. I absolutely loved it and I can't wait to see how they're going to proceed. I so enjoy reading this great adventure. A big hug, Ulla xcx
Comment Written 23-Jun-2024
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2024
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Hi Ulla,
Great to read your six star review! It was a bright and shining addition to my morning! I'm glad you liked the action and drama. It will stay pretty intense for a while now. There will probably be one more resting chapter back in Concorde Valley, then it will ramp back up again.
Hugs from Texas,
Rhonda
