Moody
A rhyming poem written for fun37 total reviews
Comment from Willie P. Smith
A very good read. Good rhyme, and is very understandable. You describe many of us who get a moody streak once in a while. However, most of us don't want to admit it even if it's pointed out
by an observer. Very good. Willie
reply by the author on 14-May-2024
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A very good read. Good rhyme, and is very understandable. You describe many of us who get a moody streak once in a while. However, most of us don't want to admit it even if it's pointed out
by an observer. Very good. Willie
Comment Written 13-May-2024
reply by the author on 14-May-2024
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Thank you, Willie. I agree, most of us won't admit it if we are moody. I had fun with the idea. I am glad this resonated with you.
We moody ones need to stick together.
Thanks for the kind review.
Jesse
Comment from cupa tea
Easy to follow, enjoyable to read not too long not too short. I think it has the best of both worlds. Nicely done. If it's for a contest good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 14-May-2024
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Easy to follow, enjoyable to read not too long not too short. I think it has the best of both worlds. Nicely done. If it's for a contest good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 13-May-2024
reply by the author on 14-May-2024
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Just like Goldilocks and the Three Bears, not too long and not too short, just right.
I am happy you enjoyed reading this poem.
The best of both worlds.
It is not for a contest.
Thanks for the positive feedback.
Jesse
Comment from robyn corum
JJ,
Hey, dude, I get it. I enjoyed this piece, myself and could totally relate. I thought it kinda ended on a bit of a negative note - if I'm reading correctly -- and that left a bad taste in my mouth sorta, because I feel like I know better. The first two verses seemed more victorious and in-your-face. That was cool.
A couple of notes, if I may:
1.) Living,' unforgiven
--> first, if you're commenting on living unforgiven - you don't need the comma - it can be deleted
--> but then, if you aren't using elision, you don't need that apostrophe. If you ARE - which is what I think - perhaps you need to edit to: livin' - as in:
--> Livin' unforgiven
2.) Slipplin,' talking flippant
-->wondering if you meant slippin' - without the extra 'l'
Thanks, friend. I enjoyed this, too!
reply by the author on 13-May-2024
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JJ,
Hey, dude, I get it. I enjoyed this piece, myself and could totally relate. I thought it kinda ended on a bit of a negative note - if I'm reading correctly -- and that left a bad taste in my mouth sorta, because I feel like I know better. The first two verses seemed more victorious and in-your-face. That was cool.
A couple of notes, if I may:
1.) Living,' unforgiven
--> first, if you're commenting on living unforgiven - you don't need the comma - it can be deleted
--> but then, if you aren't using elision, you don't need that apostrophe. If you ARE - which is what I think - perhaps you need to edit to: livin' - as in:
--> Livin' unforgiven
2.) Slipplin,' talking flippant
-->wondering if you meant slippin' - without the extra 'l'
Thanks, friend. I enjoyed this, too!
Comment Written 13-May-2024
reply by the author on 13-May-2024
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Thanks for taking the time to read and review my poem.
I am glad you enjoyed it.
Jesse
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
It is a fun post. I write a lot of serious love poems and sometimes I take a break and write something funny.
I can identify with the mental challenges.
Well done, take it easy.
reply by the author on 13-May-2024
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It is a fun post. I write a lot of serious love poems and sometimes I take a break and write something funny.
I can identify with the mental challenges.
Well done, take it easy.
Comment Written 13-May-2024
reply by the author on 13-May-2024
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Yes, we writers all need a break from the serious stuff every once in a while.
I wrote this for fun.
Mental challenges are difficult to navigate for the best of us, my friend.
Take care,
Jesse
Comment from harmony13
The author's words are interesting, descriptive and
creative. I really liked the title of this poem as the
author describes well throughout the poem. The
poem flows and connects well. Hope you are having
a great day, Jesse!
reply by the author on 14-May-2024
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The author's words are interesting, descriptive and
creative. I really liked the title of this poem as the
author describes well throughout the poem. The
poem flows and connects well. Hope you are having
a great day, Jesse!
Comment Written 13-May-2024
reply by the author on 14-May-2024
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Yes, I had a good time creating this title, and the rest of the poem was a blast to write together.
I am glad you enjoyed reading this poem.
I appreciate your kind words.
I had a good day and am enjoying the evening.
Jesse
Comment from gansach
I like the internal rhymes as well as the end of line rhymes, definitely adds to the rhythm. One question: second stanza, first line-is it intended to be slipplin' or should it be slippin'? Just curious as I've done some word inventing in my time which is fun, but most times is taken as a mistake. Very good effort! Best wishes!
reply by the author on 14-May-2024
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I like the internal rhymes as well as the end of line rhymes, definitely adds to the rhythm. One question: second stanza, first line-is it intended to be slipplin' or should it be slippin'? Just curious as I've done some word inventing in my time which is fun, but most times is taken as a mistake. Very good effort! Best wishes!
Comment Written 13-May-2024
reply by the author on 14-May-2024
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Yes, not only did I have fun writing this poem, but I had a blast inventing a new word.
I am glad you liked the internal rhymes and the rhythm of this poem.
Thanks for the good wishes.
Jesse
Comment from Ulla
This is a wonderful poem, Jesse, and I'm.so glad you're having some fun while writing it. It's great to be able to have a good laugh at one self. It can be cathartic. All best, Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 14-May-2024
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This is a wonderful poem, Jesse, and I'm.so glad you're having some fun while writing it. It's great to be able to have a good laugh at one self. It can be cathartic. All best, Ulla:)))
Comment Written 13-May-2024
reply by the author on 14-May-2024
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Yes, I agree. It was cathartic to write this fun poem. Laughing at oneself is a healthy way to live. Thanks for the positive feedback.
Take care,
Jesse
Comment from Begin Again
Your spirit is rising to the challenge and you have found new life and passed it along to your writing as well. Stay strong, burn those bridges and place better ones in their place. Just be yourself... as you always are ... and when a shadow crosses your door, reach out to all of us.
Smiles, Carol
reply by the author on 14-May-2024
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Your spirit is rising to the challenge and you have found new life and passed it along to your writing as well. Stay strong, burn those bridges and place better ones in their place. Just be yourself... as you always are ... and when a shadow crosses your door, reach out to all of us.
Smiles, Carol
Comment Written 13-May-2024
reply by the author on 14-May-2024
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Thanks, Carol, for your encouraging review.
I appreciate your kind words and your offer for me to reach out to you and the others here on this site.
Thanks for the smiles.
Jesse
Comment from Madeleine Mardis
Sheesh, Jesse, way to go! The good feelings of healthy, earned, self-approval come wafting off this poem!
A genius and brilliant work, just as fun and uplifting as you wanna be! Maddy
reply by the author on 13-May-2024
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Sheesh, Jesse, way to go! The good feelings of healthy, earned, self-approval come wafting off this poem!
A genius and brilliant work, just as fun and uplifting as you wanna be! Maddy
Comment Written 13-May-2024
reply by the author on 13-May-2024
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Thanks, Maddy, for your kind and inspiring review and the six stars to go along with it.
I love the way you express yourself!
You have seen straight through the inner core of my self-expression.
Thanks a whole lot!
Enjoy the upcoming week!
Jesse
Comment from Pam (respa)
-I'm glad to see you writing for fun, Jesse.
-You wrote a good poem about it
with effective imagery and rhyme.
-It does sound like you are
burning your bridges for fun, as well as
"turning diamonds to coal."
-I like your concluding lines about laughter,
and then "the strongest has won."
-It sounds like a new attitude to me,
and that's a good thing.
-Have a great day and week ahead.
reply by the author on 14-May-2024
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-I'm glad to see you writing for fun, Jesse.
-You wrote a good poem about it
with effective imagery and rhyme.
-It does sound like you are
burning your bridges for fun, as well as
"turning diamonds to coal."
-I like your concluding lines about laughter,
and then "the strongest has won."
-It sounds like a new attitude to me,
and that's a good thing.
-Have a great day and week ahead.
Comment Written 13-May-2024
reply by the author on 14-May-2024
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Thanks, Pam, for this detailed and positive review. I appreciate your kind words and sharing how you view my new attitude.
Yes, it is a good thing.
Enjoy the upcoming week.
Jesse
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You are very welcome, Jesse, and I appreciate your reply.
