Stronghold
Shakespearean Sonnet21 total reviews
Comment from June Sargent
I really enjoyed the powerful imagery of your words describing the bond love as a fortress. Any relationship faces challenges over time, but a firm foundation upon which you can build one stone at a time guarantees that it will survive and thrive. Well done!
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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I really enjoyed the powerful imagery of your words describing the bond love as a fortress. Any relationship faces challenges over time, but a firm foundation upon which you can build one stone at a time guarantees that it will survive and thrive. Well done!
Comment Written 02-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Hi, June. Thank you for this fine review.
My wife and I have been together more than fifty years so our 'fortress' has weathered quite a few storms.
Steve
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I hear you. We just celebrated our 55th anniversary!
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Well done! A rare achievement!
Comment from lyenochka
A beautiful sonnet and well crafted and lovely to read aloud. How much we need that kind of stronghold of love for the the marriages today as so many treat it as some kind of temporary agreement.
Best wishes in the contest!
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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A beautiful sonnet and well crafted and lovely to read aloud. How much we need that kind of stronghold of love for the the marriages today as so many treat it as some kind of temporary agreement.
Best wishes in the contest!
Comment Written 01-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Thank you!! Contest win too.
I had to wrangle with this one a bit to get it into shape although the basic metaphor was clear in my mind from the beginning. For instance the lines that ended up as the couplet were originally in stanza 1. I moved them because I felt they gave a strong ending. Then, of course, I had to find suitable replacement lines for them...
Steve
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Forever the wordsmith! Thanks for sharing about the benefits of editing!
Congratulations again on the win. I posted on your profile page.
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When I think about it, I suspect my humorous stuff gets little editing attention, but for something more serious it is certainly worth the time. My usual problem for contest pieces is that I am working so close to the deadline! Thank goodness this one coincided with a long weekend so I had a little more leisure to tweak it.
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I have the same problem. I find my better works are like watercolor painting - let it dry - add another shade - let it soak in -- add more...
Comment from Brenda Strauser
Very nice poem. I like how you describe love in the first verse: our love has been a fortress. The picture goes well with the poem. Very good job on this
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Very nice poem. I like how you describe love in the first verse: our love has been a fortress. The picture goes well with the poem. Very good job on this
Comment Written 01-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Hi, Brenda. Thanks for the very kind words in your review. I won the contest!
Steve
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Congraulations!
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I happen to enjoy sonnets and this contest entry is a very well written sonnet. Thank you for sharing this entry with us. I enjoyed reading and wish you luck with the contest.
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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I happen to enjoy sonnets and this contest entry is a very well written sonnet. Thank you for sharing this entry with us. I enjoyed reading and wish you luck with the contest.
Comment Written 01-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Thanks, Barbara. I can always rely on you for a sound and positive review. I won the contest with this!
Steve
Comment from jim vecchio
A very touching sonnet. Exactly how I felt about my wife when she was here. (Also about our generator. Sorry!) Your perfect choice of words should blow you over the top!
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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A very touching sonnet. Exactly how I felt about my wife when she was here. (Also about our generator. Sorry!) Your perfect choice of words should blow you over the top!
Comment Written 01-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Thanks, Jim. I hope your generator is still chugging along! :O)
Steve
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It's still chugging but someone else is benefitting from at. When my wife died, I had to sell the house.
Comment from Begin Again
I definitely could see someone in Shakespearan attire standing on a stage and speaking these words of love. The woman he spoke to would be enthralled. Nicely written.
Smiles, Carol
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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I definitely could see someone in Shakespearan attire standing on a stage and speaking these words of love. The woman he spoke to would be enthralled. Nicely written.
Smiles, Carol
Comment Written 01-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Carol, many forcing the point with Elizabethan thanks for the kind words.
Yes, I tried to get into the Shakespearean mindset without actually forcing the point with Elizabethan language. Sonnets are great for love poems - my wife approved and so did the judges.
Steve
Comment from tfawcus
Somewhat appropriately, your Shakespearean sonnet brought to mind Cordelia's love for her father. Your metaphor of the citadel of love, proof against the vicissitudes of life and the ravages of age, makes for a splendid sonnet. May the judges think so too! If not, you can always rely on the proof of your love to buoy your spirits or imbibe some 70 proof spirit to drown your sorrows.
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Somewhat appropriately, your Shakespearean sonnet brought to mind Cordelia's love for her father. Your metaphor of the citadel of love, proof against the vicissitudes of life and the ravages of age, makes for a splendid sonnet. May the judges think so too! If not, you can always rely on the proof of your love to buoy your spirits or imbibe some 70 proof spirit to drown your sorrows.
Comment Written 01-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Thanks, Tony. I appreciate your insight into this. I hadn't actually considered Lear/Cordelia although now I recognise an echo
Poor naked wretches, wheresoe?er you are,
That bide the pelting of this pitiless storm,
How shall your houseless heads and unfed sides,
Your looped and windowed raggedness defend you
From seasons such as these? O, I have taken
Too little care of this.
No need to resort to drink, as it happens!
Steve
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
A sweet natured sonnet about love and the strength of it to conquer all. I wish you luck with the contest Steve, your love proves to be stronger than ever here, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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A sweet natured sonnet about love and the strength of it to conquer all. I wish you luck with the contest Steve, your love proves to be stronger than ever here, love Dolly x
Comment Written 01-Apr-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Thanks, Dolly. Can't go past a good love story for a sonnet, can you.
And the judges apparently agree!
Steve
Comment from Tom Horonzy
Between the picture selected and the vocabulary used I had to look out my window to see if I was in a cold, damp castle in the fourteenth century
Well done
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Between the picture selected and the vocabulary used I had to look out my window to see if I was in a cold, damp castle in the fourteenth century
Well done
Comment Written 31-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Thanks, Tom. If I were to transport you to a castle, I should make sure it was double-glazed and retrofitted with heat pumps in every room - even the dungeon.
Steve
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Thank you, Sire
I pledge allegiance to thee and your writings
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
This is an excellently crafted sonnet. Your lines flow effortlessly with perfect syntax, rhyme and meter. Your imagery of the fortress representing the strength of their love provides a magical, timeless theme. Well done and good luck! Debbie
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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This is an excellently crafted sonnet. Your lines flow effortlessly with perfect syntax, rhyme and meter. Your imagery of the fortress representing the strength of their love provides a magical, timeless theme. Well done and good luck! Debbie
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 31-Mar-2024
reply by the author on 05-Apr-2024
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Hi, Debbie. Thanks for this fine review and also for the personal message. As you say, it is a timeless theme - perhaps because the metaphor is so accurate. I was pleased to find the judges agreed!
Steve