Comment from Wendy G

Excellent

A very dramatic chapter and one can't help but feel sorry for Gabby who really seems to be abandoned by all. Can't help wondering what's in the envelope. A good place to stop. Well written.
Wendy

 Comment Written 02-Feb-2024

---

reply by the author on 02-Feb-2024

Good morning, Wendy

Yes, Gabby has been burdened with much more sadness than any child should face, especially alone. At her age, she should be experiencing the fun and happiness, not grief and emptiness. Thanks so much for reading and enjoying.

Smiles Carol

Comment from Carol Hillebrenner

Excellent

Good place to stop, quite a cliffhanger. This is a tragic story happening every day to one girl or another. No answer seems to be the right one for everyone, unless there is an adoptive family involved. Suggestion: . . . (about) a few blocks away. Remove about, reads oddly.

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2024

---

reply by the author on 02-Feb-2024

You are so right! We all pray our young people will stay safe and responsible, but unfortunately, life doesn't always play out that way. I've seen it and I know how destructive it can be. Thanks for reading, Carol. I am thrilled you are enjoying it.
Smiles, Carol

Comment from LJbutterfly

Excellent

I knew the football star wouldn't be looking forward to taking care of a baby. What's in the envelope? Could it be money for an abortion? You really know how to write suspenseful, true-to-life stories. I'm hooked. See you in the next chapter.

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2024

---

reply by the author on 02-Feb-2024

Thank you again for putting a smile on my face. Unfortunately, I have a lot of real life drama that helps me write these stories. Thank you for enjoying my efforts.

Smiles, Carol

Comment from eliz100

Excellent

This is another excellent chapter. The hook at te end is great. It keeps me wanting to read the next chapter. I do not see any room for improvement. Have a blessed day.

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2024

---

reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024

As always, I thank you very much for continuing to follow and enjoy the story. Have a great day! Carol

Comment from prettybluebirds

Excellent

Excellent finish for this chapter. It ensures the reader will continue because we must find out what the letter is about. I will be waiting for the next addition to the story.

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2024

---

reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024

If you enjoyed the lead up to the letter, you're going to love the next few chapters... things are going to get crazy. Thanks again for your wonderful review.

Smiles, Carol

Comment from Iza Deleanu

Excellent

I hate this we full together, but then it's your mess:"er words struck a chord with Jason, and his head snapped toward her, growling, "No, we didn't expect. It wasn't -- isn't part of my -- our plan. My future is football, not taking care of your baby."
"

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2024

---

reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024

Thanks for stopping by and leaving a review, Iza. Your time is greatly appreciated. Smiles, Carol

Comment from royowen

Excellent

I'm betting the boy is an honourable boy. But the negotiating and the navigation of young emotions is a testing time in the young, it guides them one way or the other, whether self is more important than the life of others, this a great edifying episode, I see myself as a young man, being faced with life, beautifully written, Carprol, blessings Roy

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2024

---

reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024

In my opinion, Jason was taught from a very young age where is life was headed... living the life of a pro-football star. He's got tunnel vision because of it. He doesn't sense his obligation or responsibilities outside that circle. Thanks so much for the wonderful review, Roy. Appreciate it very much.

Hugs, Carol

reply by royowen on 01-Feb-2024

Most welcome

reply by royowen on 01-Feb-2024

I was an athlete, I learned to commit to the team and fairness, sport teaches,principals too Carol.

Comment from barbara.wilkey

Excellent

Pick up the envelope. I need to know what's in it, and of course, so does Gabby. I really like this story. It's real.

when we'd decided to sustain until after we graduated? (abstain???)

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2024

---

reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024

Thanks as usual for catching my glitch...I appreciate it very much. but more importantly, I appreciate you following the story and getting the sense of how real these emotions are for teenagers. They try to live in the fast line and no very little about the rules.

Hugs, Carol

Comment from Debbie D'Arcy

Excellent

This is a flawless write, filled with evocative detail that enhanced but never got in the way of the momentum of the plot. Already I'm relating to Gabby who not only has lost her mother but has a drunken father to contend with and now a pregnancy, unwanted by her boyfriend. The contents of the envelope will not be very welcome, I'm assuming. Thank you for sharing this fine post which was a joy to read. Take care Debbie

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 01-Feb-2024

---

reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024

Aww, Debbie, you put a thankful smile on my face. This story is far from my usual "thrillers" and I have written in a while, so it's awesome when someone really enjoys it. Thank you so much. Smiles and hugs, Carol