Miranda's Trouble In Paradise
Viewing comments for Chapter 25 "Lights Off"Miranda tries to find Dougie.
21 total reviews
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
As always, your dialogue is authentic, real and I always feel like I am actually in the room with these characters as the conversation flows so easily. Another talented post from your pen Gretchen, a joy to read, you would make an empty cardboard box sound interesting, love Dolly x x x
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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As always, your dialogue is authentic, real and I always feel like I am actually in the room with these characters as the conversation flows so easily. Another talented post from your pen Gretchen, a joy to read, you would make an empty cardboard box sound interesting, love Dolly x x x
Comment Written 01-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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Hahaha. Now a challenge to give life to an empty cardboard box. Thank you. Gretchen
Comment from Wendy G
I did wonder if he was heading that way, but they are not right for each other. They're more like "mates". Hope it doesn't change their relationship too much, or make it more complicated. Well written.
Wendy
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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I did wonder if he was heading that way, but they are not right for each other. They're more like "mates". Hope it doesn't change their relationship too much, or make it more complicated. Well written.
Wendy
Comment Written 01-Feb-2024
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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It will make it awkward but that's to be expected. Thank you so much. Gretchen
Comment from BethShelby
Miranda has got a lot on mind. I'm think she already new how Aaron felt but was hoping he wouldn't bring it our and get hurt she didn't feel the same way. It seems she handled well but he is hurt. I got into this story late and don't why she though Dougie was dead.
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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Miranda has got a lot on mind. I'm think she already new how Aaron felt but was hoping he wouldn't bring it our and get hurt she didn't feel the same way. It seems she handled well but he is hurt. I got into this story late and don't why she though Dougie was dead.
Comment Written 31-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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I think she knew as well, but hoped it wouldn't ever surface. Thank you fir this nice review. Gretchen
Comment from Debbie D'Arcy
Well, that was unexpected, not only to Miranda! No wonder she feels tested. All she wants to do is resolve the disappearance of Dougie and now this confession! Your story reads, as ever, fluently with excellent dialogue, always reflecting character and humour. Thanks for sharing, Gretchen. Debbie
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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Well, that was unexpected, not only to Miranda! No wonder she feels tested. All she wants to do is resolve the disappearance of Dougie and now this confession! Your story reads, as ever, fluently with excellent dialogue, always reflecting character and humour. Thanks for sharing, Gretchen. Debbie
Comment Written 31-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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Thank you so much, Debbie. Glad you enjoyed this one. Gretchen
Comment from Sankey
This was another great chapter. You keep us on track all the way with these twists and turns.
The quote from the bible is ..."The LOVE OF 'Money is the root of all evil.' "
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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This was another great chapter. You keep us on track all the way with these twists and turns.
The quote from the bible is ..."The LOVE OF 'Money is the root of all evil.' "
Comment Written 31-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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I don't think Miranda would quote the Bible. Lol. It's what most say around here. Thank you fir this. Gretchen
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Poor Aaron, he'll get over it and find someone for himself. But, I'm thinking that Miranda has made up her mind and she won't say either way to Waylon whether his dad is dead or alive. I think she is wise at the moment. With all that's going on, is it any wonder that Miranda is asking if God is testing her? Another excellent chapter, Gretchen. I'm really enjoying this story. Warmest hugs, Sandra xxx
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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Poor Aaron, he'll get over it and find someone for himself. But, I'm thinking that Miranda has made up her mind and she won't say either way to Waylon whether his dad is dead or alive. I think she is wise at the moment. With all that's going on, is it any wonder that Miranda is asking if God is testing her? Another excellent chapter, Gretchen. I'm really enjoying this story. Warmest hugs, Sandra xxx
Comment Written 31-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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Thank you, Sandra. I'm so glad you are liking this. Gretchen
Comment from Julie Helms
I am jumping into the middle of your story, but I think it is very well written. You do a good job with understated character development that is believable.
I have just a couple suggestions for grammar fixes:
1.giving hard earned money (hard-earned money)
2. Money is the root of all evil (The love of money is the root of all evil. This is often misquoted. And it is possible that you want your character to misquote it that way)
3. the whole time I was in seminary school (I know a lot of people who have been to seminary, and they call it seminary, not seminary school. FWIW.)
4. Blonde (blond)
I really enjoyed this and I hope to follow along. Thanks for posting! Julie
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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I am jumping into the middle of your story, but I think it is very well written. You do a good job with understated character development that is believable.
I have just a couple suggestions for grammar fixes:
1.giving hard earned money (hard-earned money)
2. Money is the root of all evil (The love of money is the root of all evil. This is often misquoted. And it is possible that you want your character to misquote it that way)
3. the whole time I was in seminary school (I know a lot of people who have been to seminary, and they call it seminary, not seminary school. FWIW.)
4. Blonde (blond)
I really enjoyed this and I hope to follow along. Thanks for posting! Julie
Comment Written 31-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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Thank you for the edits. I will go correct them. I appreciate the nice review. Gretchen
Comment from Wayne Fowler
Well, well, well.
Nicely written.
Matrimony everywhere you look.
I'd say she needs to jump to the 'doing laundry stage' pretty quick.
I don't know why she kept Dougie's call a secret, though.
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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Well, well, well.
Nicely written.
Matrimony everywhere you look.
I'd say she needs to jump to the 'doing laundry stage' pretty quick.
I don't know why she kept Dougie's call a secret, though.
Comment Written 31-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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He told her if anyone knows he's alive, everyone will be in danger. Thank you for this nice review. Gretchen
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Yeah, I remember that, but dismissed it as hyperbole. Prob'ly shouldn't do that in FanStory. Things are there for a reason.
Comment from Rachelle Allen
Everyone knew this but Miranda, and that's a little surprising since she's usually so good about reading the room. But, I guess if you think of someone as a little brother, you imagine he's doing the same.
Nicely done chapter, Gretchen. Sorry I'm out of sixes.
xoxox
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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Everyone knew this but Miranda, and that's a little surprising since she's usually so good about reading the room. But, I guess if you think of someone as a little brother, you imagine he's doing the same.
Nicely done chapter, Gretchen. Sorry I'm out of sixes.
xoxox
Comment Written 31-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 01-Feb-2024
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She knew it, but never expected to have him come forward. Lol. Ignorance is bliss. Thank you, Rachelle. Gretchen
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Right. But her life is never without complications, so she should have imagined that, eventually, it was yet another wrinkle she'd have to iron out.
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
This post has excellent description of emotions and the interaction between Miranda and Aaron. I was surprised by the way Aaron backed down at rejection, expecting a stronger response. I enjoyed my read, thanks, kay
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reply by the author on 04-Feb-2024
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This post has excellent description of emotions and the interaction between Miranda and Aaron. I was surprised by the way Aaron backed down at rejection, expecting a stronger response. I enjoyed my read, thanks, kay
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 31-Jan-2024
reply by the author on 04-Feb-2024
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Aaron is a peacemaker. Too soft to pose a threat. Miranda would put him in his place and he knows it. Lol. Thank you for this. Gretchen