Indecision
Free Verse ~ Love poem20 total reviews
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Excellent entry for the Love Poem Poetry Contest. It reminded me of my exhusband. LoL
Great response to T.S. Eliot's "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock"
Good luck in the contest.
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
Excellent entry for the Love Poem Poetry Contest. It reminded me of my exhusband. LoL
Great response to T.S. Eliot's "The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock"
Good luck in the contest.
Comment Written 22-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
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Thank you very much, Gypsy!! So sorry for the late response!!
Melissa
Comment from Pantygynt
This is an exceptionally fine response to Eliot's Prufrock'. You have followed his style well and made good use of the device known as fragmentation which works well in this context. I was a bit surprised this had not attracted more six star reviews, so I hope this will go some way towards redressing that.
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2023
This is an exceptionally fine response to Eliot's Prufrock'. You have followed his style well and made good use of the device known as fragmentation which works well in this context. I was a bit surprised this had not attracted more six star reviews, so I hope this will go some way towards redressing that.
Comment Written 22-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2023
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Thank you Jim. I really appreciate your evaluation of this piece. I always struggle with self confidence when writing FreeVerse. I am much more comfortable with metered rhyme. I think the downbeat feelings evoked in this piece do not encourage six star reviews... no matter the quality, plus it really helps to read Prufrock first to come away with that feeling of indecision and the woman's frustration that results from it. Again, thanks so much for teaching the classes. They have made a world of difference in my writing!!
Hugs, Melissa
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I can understand your lack of confidence. That is rooted in the fact that, by definition there are not the firm rules of form applicable to formal verse. But remember, read aloud and ask yourself whether it sings.this piece of yours sang for me.
Comment from Tom Horonzy
I have read his poem maybe thrice, or more. Thanks for the remnder to reread it once more.
Where have you been my FS friend? It has been some time since I heard of or from you. Hope all has been well.
As for this piece, I feel a draft with the castle walls chilling me to the bones of yesteryear. Well done.
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
I have read his poem maybe thrice, or more. Thanks for the remnder to reread it once more.
Where have you been my FS friend? It has been some time since I heard of or from you. Hope all has been well.
As for this piece, I feel a draft with the castle walls chilling me to the bones of yesteryear. Well done.
Comment Written 22-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
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Hello Tom. I am so very sorry for the late response... life has been super busy and I can't seem to slow down enough to write. So glad you enjoyed this verse. It was my homework assignment for the FreeVerse class that Jim taught last week. Hugs!
Melissa
Comment from Daylily
This clearly expresses the thoughts of many hearts wanting--and waiting--for a desirable response that never arrives. The concluding verse reveals a strong, accurate, and healthier appraisal of the situation that allows the woman to move forward into a better situation. This is an excellent entry in the contest.
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
This clearly expresses the thoughts of many hearts wanting--and waiting--for a desirable response that never arrives. The concluding verse reveals a strong, accurate, and healthier appraisal of the situation that allows the woman to move forward into a better situation. This is an excellent entry in the contest.
Comment Written 22-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
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Thank you so much!! Sorry for the late reply.
Comment from royowen
A beautifully written and composed dedication to the TS Eliot's classic work. You've made this a wonderful apt and nicely written free verse poem dear Melissa, great write my friend, well done, blessings Roy
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
A beautifully written and composed dedication to the TS Eliot's classic work. You've made this a wonderful apt and nicely written free verse poem dear Melissa, great write my friend, well done, blessings Roy
Comment Written 22-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
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Thanks so much Roy! Hugs!!
Melissa
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Most welcome
Comment from dragonpoet
Hi Melissa,
This is a sad situation where love doesn't need to be lost. If she loves him so much she should let him know. It she thinks he love her that it doesn't matter who says it first. Maybe he is waiting for her to say "I love you" first.
Good luck in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
Have a good week,
Joan
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
Hi Melissa,
This is a sad situation where love doesn't need to be lost. If she loves him so much she should let him know. It she thinks he love her that it doesn't matter who says it first. Maybe he is waiting for her to say "I love you" first.
Good luck in the contest.
Keep writing and stay healthy.
Have a good week,
Joan
Comment Written 22-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
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Thank you so much, Joan!! I appreciate your thoughts on this verse!
Melissa
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Don?t mention it,
Melissa.
Joan
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
I think there is so much frustration in unrequited love and you captured the essence of it here in your magical free-write with some subtle internal rhyming within Melissa. A very clever and talented post, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
I think there is so much frustration in unrequited love and you captured the essence of it here in your magical free-write with some subtle internal rhyming within Melissa. A very clever and talented post, much enjoyed, love Dolly x
Comment Written 22-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
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Hi there Dolly. First, I'm so sorry for the late response!!! This piece was homework from the FV class Jim taught this past month. We read Eliot's "The Love Story of J. Alfred Prufrock" and I just HAD to write a rebuttal. LOL. Thanks so much!!
Melissa
Comment from Alexandra Trovato
Those who are frustrated, have not found love, in my view. This is an excellent poem, well though out and written. You use descriptive words and imagery to express feelings to which many readers will relate. Through my own journey in life, I have found that love ends questions. When love exists there are only answers and goals that come true.
Best wishes,
Alexandra
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
Those who are frustrated, have not found love, in my view. This is an excellent poem, well though out and written. You use descriptive words and imagery to express feelings to which many readers will relate. Through my own journey in life, I have found that love ends questions. When love exists there are only answers and goals that come true.
Best wishes,
Alexandra
Comment Written 22-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
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Thanks so much Alexandra for your insightful comments. Sorry for the late response!
Melissa
Comment from Bill Schott
This free verse, Indecision, speaks with vivid language to the couple kept ununited by one of the pair's inability to commit. The fallback decision is to place the passion in oneself and make commitment there.
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reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
This free verse, Indecision, speaks with vivid language to the couple kept ununited by one of the pair's inability to commit. The fallback decision is to place the passion in oneself and make commitment there.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 22-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 29-Oct-2023
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Thank you Bill!
Melissa
Comment from Sally Law
Sad poem in reply to the man that can't seem to get it done in the love department. Had one of those early on before my husband. Wonderfully penned and illustrated in this unique poetry form too.
One misspelled word: childish or possibly childless. I'm not sure.
Sending you my best today as always and best wishes for the upcoming contest.
Sal XOs
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2023
Sad poem in reply to the man that can't seem to get it done in the love department. Had one of those early on before my husband. Wonderfully penned and illustrated in this unique poetry form too.
One misspelled word: childish or possibly childless. I'm not sure.
Sending you my best today as always and best wishes for the upcoming contest.
Sal XOs
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 22-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 22-Oct-2023
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Thank you so much, Sally. Yes, I knew one too and was so frustrated. This was my homework for the FS Poetry Class on FreeVerse that we finished yesterday. I so love the classes!! I really appreciate your comments and I will go and edit the word. Hugs!
Melissa