Reviews from

Coffee With Iris

Viewing comments for Chapter 30 "Leaving is Hard"
Two opposites meet and connect.

26 total reviews 
Comment from nancy_e_davis
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Wow, the room will really be crowded with ghosts when I go! Nearly everybody I love is in the other side. This is a good chapter. Tasteful and comforting to someone like me. I do know this. My Mother had a massive stroke which had paralyzed her, but on her deathbed she sat up and reached out toward the door of the room.
Dad said My grandfather him, "Well, they've come to get me son," no one was in the room except him and his father.
Well done. Nancy:)

 Comment Written 28-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 28-Aug-2023
    I thoroughly believe we all will have our favorites escort us home. Too many people have had the same experience as Iris, for it not to be true. Thanks so much. Gretchen
Comment from Alexandra Trovato
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is an excellent story. I enjoy reading it. Your entire presentation is good. You use descriptive words that draw in a reader and made him or her think. I live the authentic dialogue. It was very touching.

Best wishes!

Alexandra


 Comment Written 27-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 28-Aug-2023
    Thanks so much. I'm glad you find my story interesting. Gretchen
Comment from Jay Squires
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is a moving chapter, not at all syrupy, as you feared.

Allow me a small suggestion, Gretchen. "I hear the distant sobbing of Jameson." This is such a crucial line and I think it would do you better service in the active voice, "I hear Jamison's distant sobbing." It's the natural conclusion for what had to pass. I liked your introspective writing from Iris' viewpoint, bordering on stream of consciousness.

 Comment Written 27-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 28-Aug-2023
    Thanks, Jay. Iris had to have her final chapter. And of course, it had to be with all of those she loved. I'm so glad you liked it. One more to go. Gretchen
Comment from pome lover
Excellent
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well, I was close to tears on this one. If it had been longer, I probably would've succumbed. But, her happy reunion with her husband was lovely, as well as the prospect of the same with her son.
Very good!!
Katharine

 Comment Written 27-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 28-Aug-2023
    Thanks, Katharine. I'm so happy you liked it. Gretchen
Comment from Rachelle Allen
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

It's short, but I think that's smart. Dragging it out wouldn't have made it better in any way. And it's not syrupy. It's real...and what we all hope is true when "the time comes."

I thought you did a fine job here.


 Comment Written 27-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 28-Aug-2023
    Thanks, Rachelle. You and Jay Squires are my writing compass. Lol. If you all don't like it, I start over. Gretchen
reply by Rachelle Allen on 28-Aug-2023
    Wow. That is QUITE the compliment. Thank you, Gretchen.

    My go-to person that way is Michele Harber.
Comment from Teri7
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Gretchen, This is a very well written ending, I just hate that is is over. What about Jameson? Are you going to write something about him again? It would be really good if you did so he could have a happy ending. I do believe when we leave this earth we will see Jesus and our loved ones that have gone on before us! Beautiful job my friend. love and blessings, Teri

 Comment Written 27-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 27-Aug-2023
    One more chapter. Jameson will see this story out. Thanks so much for this. Gretchen
reply by Teri7 on 27-Aug-2023
    Yaay!!!
Comment from Katherine M. (k-11)
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Posts about death work best when they are short in my opinion. I am confused though. Is this the end or not? On the one hand I don't see how it can be anything but, but on the other I am missing Jameson's closure. kay

 Comment Written 27-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 27-Aug-2023
    Jameson will be the last chapter. He will get his closure. Thanks so much for this. Gretchen
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
Excellent
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Oh my goodness Gretchen, this is heartbreaking and the pull of death is something no one can resist. We always knew this was going to happen, but it is always hard to hear the words spoken here. You handled this moment so expertly and gave the reader some peace here, love Dolly x x x

 Comment Written 27-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 27-Aug-2023
    Thanks Dolly. I was hoping it wouldn't be too sad. Thank you for riding this story out. Gretchen
reply by Dolly'sPoems on 28-Aug-2023
    I have thoroughly enjoyed this story Gretchen x x x
Comment from Carol Hillebrenner
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

It is short but it is really quite lovely. I think the hope it gives anyone who reads it makes it a fantastic way to end Iris's time on earth. I hope we now see how Jamison confronts his new life. Unfortunately, he is not yet divorced.

 Comment Written 27-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 27-Aug-2023
    He has the next chapter and will finish the story. Thanks for this awesome review. Gretchen
Comment from BethShelby
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

It doesn't sound syrupy at all. It is beautiful way for a life to end. It is always harder on the ones left behind. When you end it like this it doesn't leave the reader feeling sad.
Beth

 Comment Written 27-Aug-2023


reply by the author on 27-Aug-2023
    I didn't want sadness to be the main objective. Wanted peace and her reward to be the main thing. Thanks so much for this six and your understanding words. Gretchen