Heart Crafted Poems - 2023
Viewing comments for Chapter 16 "Deux Parts"Musing of an old man
23 total reviews
Comment from lyenochka
I'm so glad that despite your unhappy family circumstances of your childhood, you were able to create a very happy and loving environment with your own family with children and grandchildren! Enjoyed your mono-rhymed quatrains to tell the tale. Best wishes in the contest!
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2023
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I'm so glad that despite your unhappy family circumstances of your childhood, you were able to create a very happy and loving environment with your own family with children and grandchildren! Enjoyed your mono-rhymed quatrains to tell the tale. Best wishes in the contest!
Comment Written 09-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2023
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I value your strong validation and support of my work.
Comment from Terry Broxson
It does sound like you have been blessed with a large family and managed to get it done without breaking any eggs. In short, you all did good. I enjoyed your poem. I have no suggestions that would improve it. Good luck in the contest. Well done. Terry.
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2023
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It does sound like you have been blessed with a large family and managed to get it done without breaking any eggs. In short, you all did good. I enjoyed your poem. I have no suggestions that would improve it. Good luck in the contest. Well done. Terry.
Comment Written 09-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2023
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Terry, I so appreciate your kind words.
Comment from Mark Kuglin
Nice work. It's touching and evokes imagery and emotion.
Something to consider:
When in poetry mode, it's acceptable to break the rules of regular sentence structure and punctuation.
I think you're subconsciously adhering to them.
Consciously freeing yourself of this constraint would give this piece and future work a tighter, flowing rhythm.
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2023
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Nice work. It's touching and evokes imagery and emotion.
Something to consider:
When in poetry mode, it's acceptable to break the rules of regular sentence structure and punctuation.
I think you're subconsciously adhering to them.
Consciously freeing yourself of this constraint would give this piece and future work a tighter, flowing rhythm.
Comment Written 09-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 10-Feb-2023
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Mark, thank you! I traditionally write in free verse, wherein I break freely with traditional structure. Your input is wise and well accepted.
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My pleasure
Comment from Jim Wile
This was a wonderful poem about two very different families you have been a part of. What an amazing contrast, which points out the great loss of the first family you were a part of.
I love the "known" you put at the end of the number of grandchildren line. Funny!
Great job.
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2023
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This was a wonderful poem about two very different families you have been a part of. What an amazing contrast, which points out the great loss of the first family you were a part of.
I love the "known" you put at the end of the number of grandchildren line. Funny!
Great job.
Comment Written 09-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2023
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Thank you for your thoughtfulness and kind comments, Jim.
Comment from JT traveller
A very wise and introspective poem clearly written by a man of experience in life.
Well versed, great flow and an enjoyable read.
Family means different things to different people. I have my husband and a handful of friends. This is my family and I am content.
Thankyou for sharing your poem. It was a joy to read.
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2023
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A very wise and introspective poem clearly written by a man of experience in life.
Well versed, great flow and an enjoyable read.
Family means different things to different people. I have my husband and a handful of friends. This is my family and I am content.
Thankyou for sharing your poem. It was a joy to read.
Comment Written 08-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 09-Feb-2023
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JT, then in your case life is complete and I am happy for you.
Comment from jake cosmos aller
very powerful and moving poem about family and how important family is as you get older. I seldom talk to my siblings you have inspired me to do so this weekend. Thanks
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2023
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very powerful and moving poem about family and how important family is as you get older. I seldom talk to my siblings you have inspired me to do so this weekend. Thanks
Comment Written 08-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2023
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Smiles !!
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Excellent entry for Family writing promptk contest. My kids are my precious treasure. They are my reason to live.
the rhymes didn't seem forced.
the structure make sense
it draw on my emotions
it presents strong images
I Would recommend it
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2023
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Excellent entry for Family writing promptk contest. My kids are my precious treasure. They are my reason to live.
the rhymes didn't seem forced.
the structure make sense
it draw on my emotions
it presents strong images
I Would recommend it
Comment Written 08-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2023
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Thank you.
Comment from Dolly'sPoems
In the blink of an eye our families grow up and the time flashes by and we have the opportunity to bring up children and nurture them. We prepare them for life as an adult and so the cycle continues and we are glad to be part of it. I enjoyed your journey here and wish you luck with the contest, love Dolly x
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2023
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In the blink of an eye our families grow up and the time flashes by and we have the opportunity to bring up children and nurture them. We prepare them for life as an adult and so the cycle continues and we are glad to be part of it. I enjoyed your journey here and wish you luck with the contest, love Dolly x
Comment Written 08-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2023
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My thanks for your good wishes,
Comment from poetwatch
Family is everything, author if one has love in their heart. :) I can see that you do. I also have three children and two grandchildren. Been married for forty-seven years, yet, it would feel like yesterday if it wasn't for all these aches and pain. :) This is a good entry for the Family Contest. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2023
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Family is everything, author if one has love in their heart. :) I can see that you do. I also have three children and two grandchildren. Been married for forty-seven years, yet, it would feel like yesterday if it wasn't for all these aches and pain. :) This is a good entry for the Family Contest. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 08-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2023
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PoetWatch -- Thank you and congratulations 👍👍
Comment from Anne Johnston
What a great entry for the Family contest. I like how you divided it into two parts. Our children and keep us busy and sometimes frustrated when they are little. But, oh what a blessing they are as they mature and become our greatest treasures.
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2023
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What a great entry for the Family contest. I like how you divided it into two parts. Our children and keep us busy and sometimes frustrated when they are little. But, oh what a blessing they are as they mature and become our greatest treasures.
Comment Written 08-Feb-2023
reply by the author on 08-Feb-2023
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Anne, thank you!
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You are welcome