Reviews from

Heart Crafted Poems - 2022

Viewing comments for Chapter 78 "Life gives and takes"
Musings of an old man - 2022

23 total reviews 
Comment from Marienkiefer
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Nature is not always kind but it heals itself and is regenerative. Even the scar is the healing formed over the injury and that protects, whether on trees, animals, etc.

My favourite line:
-Life like nature leaves many scars-. I love that line in your poem, showing the vulnerability as well as the scar that heals and protects the injury.
-I love the sweet grass in your poem.

A lovely poem.

 Comment Written 11-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 11-Oct-2022
    Marie, I delight in your pleasure of reading one of my poems. Thank you!
reply by Marienkiefer on 11-Oct-2022
    My pleasure🌸
Comment from Tom Horonzy
Excellent
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Maybe I should spread my wings and try writing one of these or those but suppose I get stuck, unlike you, who wrote this kyrielle so well. Some have it; others want it but won't get it even if they tried. I lie. I'm too set in my ways, I suspect.

 Comment Written 11-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 11-Oct-2022
    Smiles
Comment from Wendy G
Excellent
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A very nicely written kyrielle. I didn't realise that one could repeat differing lines from the stanzas. Your poem is well written and well presented, so sending good wishes for your entry.
Wendy

 Comment Written 11-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 11-Oct-2022
    Thanks Wendy, I believe this is unique based on the contest rules.
Comment from GWHARGIS
Excellent
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I liked this mainly because of the metaphors. The old boxcars are a favorite line. Life does taunt and torment sometimes only to be calm and nurturing the next. Great poem. I thoroughly enjoyed this. Gretchen

 Comment Written 10-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 11-Oct-2022
    Gretchen, thank you!
Comment from nomi338
Excellent
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Things that bruise and leave scars but do not kill or destroy is instructive. Only a fool continues actions that bruise and scars until death does occur. The wise find something less damaging to do.

 Comment Written 10-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 11-Oct-2022
    I have to agree, my best lessons came form life?s bruises created by wrong choices.
Comment from Jesse James Doty
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This speaks volumes about the need to slow down. I love the line Rising troubles like old boxcars become abandoned lifeless stars.
The musicality of the words sings and I love poetry that sings out loud.
This deserves a sixer as far as I am concerned.
I love the chosen picture it is quite suited for this piece. Thank you for sharing this lovely poem with all of us. You deserve to win the contest.
Jesse

 Comment Written 10-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 11-Oct-2022
    Jesse, I am quite humbled by your words and six star validation, thank you!
reply by Jesse James Doty on 11-Oct-2022
    Well deserved, my friend!
Comment from Liz Westfall
Excellent
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I really enjoyed this. I am getting familiar with kyrielles, and they are so interesting. I love the picture you attached and your word choice. I enjoy the imagery and metaphors you've created, as well.

 Comment Written 10-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 11-Oct-2022
    Thanks!
Comment from estory
Excellent
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It's an interesting take on that pastoral romantic sensibility, and in this poem full of nature images, you focus on the pain and struggle of life. Life is a struggle and we have to rise to the challenge of it. There are those trees blasted by lightning to prove it. estory

 Comment Written 10-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 11-Oct-2022
    Big smiles of acknowledgment! Thank you!
Comment from Teri7
Excellent
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This is a very well written Kyrielle poem you have penned. You used very good descriptive and true words. You used very beautiful imagery from the art work you chose. Best wishes in the contest. Teri

 Comment Written 10-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 10-Oct-2022
    Thanks much!
Comment from robyn corum
Excellent
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Dear Mystery Writer,

This is a nice example of a Kyrielle! The rhyme scheme is dependable and formatted nicely.

If I have one suggestion to offer - maybe not even for this poem if you don't want to - but it's a nugget to keep in your pocket for other pieces...

Rising troubles, like old boxcars,
become abandoned lifeless cars.
--> you really want to try to stay away from using the same word or root-word to rhyme. (Here- 'cars')
--> consider something else - stars/jars - or etc.
--> you could go for a near-rhyme like 'shards', maybe

Otherwise, I think you have a great entry for the contest -- good luck!

 Comment Written 10-Oct-2022


reply by the author on 10-Oct-2022
    robyn, as always, my thank you!