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Viewing comments for Chapter 43 "butterfly lune"
keep your hope alive....

54 total reviews 
Comment from jaded831
Excellent
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I can picture the butterfly emerging from a cocoon and flying off to add beauty to the world. Simple yet powerful and creates a beautiful image. You can never go wrong with a poem about nature, we all can relate.

 Comment Written 22-Jan-2022

reply by the author on 22-Jan-2022
    thank you jade :_)
Comment from Jesse James Doty
Excellent
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This is an excellent lune. I love how it opens with a caterpillar emerges and then the last line says beautiful flier, this is an usual ending to the very familiar story of a caterpillar turning into a butterfly. Focusing on it taking flight brings a visual to my mind but I would have preferred to see a picture of a butterfly taking a flight instead of no picture. Other than this I find nothing I would change about this poem.
Have a wonderful weekend!
Take good care of yourself and remember to always take flight as the butterfly does!
Jesse


 Comment Written 22-Jan-2022

reply by the author on 22-Jan-2022
    thank you jesse :-)
Comment from Monica Chaddick
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This is a beautiful poem. It says a lot in just a few syllables. Just a suggestion - I think some color would have added to your work, as well as a picture. That's just my opinion, however. Thank you for sharing.

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2022

reply by the author on 22-Jan-2022
    and thank you for reading, monica :-)
Comment from Gloria ....
Excellent
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The shape rather looks like a butterfly. Their metamorphosis is quite spectacular and you have captured the "mirror" imaging quite well and to form.

Wishing you great luck with the voters.

Gloria

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2022

reply by the author on 21-Jan-2022
    thank you gloria :)

    don't forget to vote
Comment from Gert sherwood
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Hello unknown author
A good entry for the lune contest.
I think it's not too late and find an image of a butterfly to enhance your lune.
Gert


 Comment Written 21-Jan-2022

reply by the author on 21-Jan-2022
    thank you gert :-)

    don't forget to vote
reply by Gert sherwood on 21-Jan-2022
    when and where do I vote?
reply by Gert sherwood on 21-Jan-2022
    when and where do I vote?
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2022
    go to where is says "contests" and click on "vote" then go the the contest you want to vote is. today is the only day to vote in this contest
reply by Gert sherwood on 21-Jan-2022
    I cannot vote why

    33 Word Spiritual Fiction
    Deadline in 3 days and no place to votee
reply by the author on 21-Jan-2022
    hmm no idea
Comment from Bill Schott
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This lune poem, Butterfly, has the right set up and takes the pulse on this example of the metamorphosis which changes worm into the warm, lovely butterfly. Nice.

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2022

reply by the author on 21-Jan-2022
    thank you bill :)

    don't forget to vote
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Excellent
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Excellent entry for the Write a Lune writing prompt contest. Good syllables count and connection between lines. I like the presentation and imagery. Good luck in the contest.

Gypsy


 Comment Written 21-Jan-2022

reply by the author on 21-Jan-2022
    thank you gypsy :-)

    don't forget to vote
Comment from Janetsue
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It is always amazing how a creeping caterpillar can change into something as beautiful as a butterfly. This is an excellent lune offering the reader something substantial to ponder...mainly, how something with llittle appeal can become so striking. Best wishes in the contest.

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2022

reply by the author on 21-Jan-2022
    thank you spangle :-)

    don't forget to vote
Comment from Wendy G
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I like the idea of this one, with the thought of the metamorphosis of a caterpillar into a butterfly. Very simply expressed. Best wishes for your entry.
Wendy

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2022

reply by the author on 21-Jan-2022
    thank you wendy :)

    don't forget to vote
Comment from The Mom/DarleneThomson
Excellent
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Your Lune-style poem is wonderful. The flow is great. I also googled to check if the poem could be centered and found that you're correct. https://poetscollective.org/poetryforms/lune/ You painted a beautiful picture of the butterfly hatching. Best wishes in the contest. Blessings, Darlene

 Comment Written 21-Jan-2022

reply by the author on 21-Jan-2022
    ooh i like that site! lots of forms listed! :-)
reply by The Mom/DarleneThomson on 22-Jan-2022
    I am glad you found it useful. I was a little hesitant to share it. But I like their definition of the Lune poem better than Fanstory's. Best wishes in the contest.